Presenting — in honor of British Cheese Week — three approaches to cheese thievery:

1) Play dumb.

2) Get tough.

3) Oh, F it.

related: The right to bear fruit

The tenth-floor kitchen at this office has no fewer than ten of these painstakingly laminated, clip-art-covered notes — and our anonymous submitter says this kitchen is only the tip of the iceberg.

“Nearly all of the notes in our office receive the same attention to detail,” our submitter says. “Every time I come to work I have to remind myself that I’m not in a cartoon fairy-tale land of fun.”

related: It takes a “genius” to come up with a potluck theme like this one

Our submitter in London snapped a photo of this note in the kitchen of the PR agency where she works. Exactly what you’d expect to find at office full of “communication professionals,” no?

related: Switch to tea

Our anonymous submitter sneakily snapped a photo of the whiteboard at a friend’s house in Urbana, Illinois.

related: Oh sweetie, I love it when you talk dirty!

Our anonymous submitter says his coworkers were taking stacks of paper towels from the bathroom and putting them in kitchen.

“HR evidently does not agree with this practice and decided to enact a one-towel play in the breakroom kitchen,” he says. (The office billing manager added the follow-up on the towels’ behalf.)

related: This is not positive communication

As this sign from a Montgomery, Alabama breakroom shows, “PopCorn Users” remain one of the most persecuted groups in the workplace today.

related: Bizarre pardoning accident

“A few years back I was living in a halfway house in Canberra where theft from the communal kitchen was a common problem,” writes Alex in Australia. “One morning we woke to discover that the fridge had gone missing.” (The coffee in question was stolen from a cupboard, but apparently the owner thought removing the fridge was the best form of attack.)

The fridge incident went unresolved for many months, Alex says, because none of the residents could be bothered to move it back inside…and nobody had $3 to spare. In fact, he says, no one ever seemed all too concerned about the whole thing, explaining, “because we spent most of our money on vice, we had no food to put in the fridge anyway.”

Eventually (long after aAex moved out) the fridge was declared a traffic hazard, and a charity took it away.

related: Um, Rene Hall?

I didn’t think i’d ever see a kitchen appliance more inappropriately anthropomorphized than this fridge, but I think this dishwasher note (from an anonymous submitter in England) dials the WTF-factor up to 11.

related: The passive-aggressive note has not been destroyed; it has been solved