My favorite part of this landlord-chiropractor dispute in Brooklyn is the (professionally printed?) “tenant snuck out over the weekend” sign. How long has this landlord had that one in reserve?

Meanwhile, Dan in Dallas received this direct-mail don’t from a doc he’s dubbed “Dmitri the chiropractor.”

related: spinal manipulation

Presenting the winner of the creative spelling (and spacing) of the year award, spotted by Rob in the recently-painted elevator of his Brooklyn apartment building. It has a lovely lyric quality to it, no?

related: Your are welcome to our home

Writes our submitter in Harpers Ferry, West Virginia: “A local candidate for county commissioner claimed that he was going to run the county like he runs his businesses.” (You know: straight talk, no bullshit, that kind of thing.)

So, if you were a Jefferson County voter, what would be your take on the guy based on this sign, from the dumpster area at one of his rental properties? Destined for law-making, right?

related: What is about dog shit that pushes Brooklynites over the edge?

Writes Tim in Berkeley: “Although this note is over 17 years old, I think it’s still worth submitting, at the very least as an example of notes from a bygone era. I received this note from the apartment manager when I was a senior at Rice University, living in an off-campus apartment. Admittedly, I wasn’t the cleanest tenant — but what 20-year-old college kid living alone in a studio apartment is?”

Adds Tim: “The really sad thing was that I had cleaned my apartment before this note — she should have seen the place before!”

related: be informed, homeland security will be

Sure, those luxury condos going up all over downtown Austin might look swanky, but our anonymous Austin submitter says her building offers plenty of exciting local color you won’t find in those glass-and-steel towers.

Perks include: 1) the building’s property manager, a character known for his impassioned screeds about everything from trash cans to expired vehicle registrations, and 2) a recurring sewage back-up that flows into the downstairs bathrooms of all the units. Rock ‘n’ roll, dude!

“The roto-rooter has said repeatedly that the backup is caused by roots growing into the sewer system,” our submitter says, but that explanation didn’t seem to satisfy her tireless PM. Now he’s offering tenants flexible lease arrangements, too!

related: A filthy hap pit

While other passive-aggressives plow through post-its with wild abandon, the caretaker of Kale‘s building in Winnipeg has a more economical style.

P.S. Vetta, I think the only thing that would make me love this note more is if your postscript began with “I wish…”

related: And what’s your Christmas wish?

Octavio in Munich says that his landlord (who shares the same apartment) is a regular high priest of paternalistic little — the entire flat is covered with them. On the bathroom wall, for example, this glorious collage is what stares back at those seated on the throne. (Altogether now: “holy shiße!”)

going OUT?…
must turn the light OFFFF!!!

so, then…
byeeeee!…

please!!!
use the toilet brush!!!

.

PES picked this note out of an apartment building in Newark, New Jersey in 2004 because he loved the third paragraph, which is oh-so-amazing. Add in the peculiar diction and the glorious redundancy of it all, and you’ve got one fucking delicious note.

related: Your to lazy

extra credit: For more deliciousness, be sure to check out the stop-motion shorts at eatpes.com.