PassiveAggressiveNotes.com » licking http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com funny (if not necessarily "passive-aggressive") notes from pissed-off people Wed, 08 Feb 2012 19:51:33 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 I Can’t Believe It’s Not (My) Butter http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2012/01/15/butter-thief/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2012/01/15/butter-thief/#comments Sun, 15 Jan 2012 22:51:34 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=20839 Tommy in Norway isn’t the only one getting butt-hurt over butter.

From the U.K…

I don't know your name, but you have seen stealing my butter. Put it back in the fridge or I will lick EVERYTHING.

to Australia…

Beck' s butter: Lisa if you touch it ur dead!!!!

to Ireland…

Stop eating our butter, and anything else that is ours.

it’s beginning to look like this butter crisis might be going global.

Meanwhile, in America…

related: A bitter butter battle

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2012/01/15/butter-thief/feed/ 28 It’s not funny, it’s my sandwich http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/12/05/its-not-funny-its-my-sandwich/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/12/05/its-not-funny-its-my-sandwich/#comments Wed, 05 Dec 2007 22:11:42 +0000 kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/12/05/its-not-funny-its-my-sandwich/ Joe in Northern Virginia has amassed a pretty divine collection of office fridge notes over the years, the best of which portend various forms of karmic/economic/physical retribution.

IT's not funny! It's not a joke! It's STEALING...and it could cost you your job! Please be sure that you don't "accidentally" eat someone else's food!

BEWARE One of your coworkers is a thief and so completely lazy that they stole my sandwich. They stole a HOMEMADE sandwich. Who steals food in the first place? And honestly, who steals a non-packaged product? Do you really want something someone else handled? From now on, I suggest everyone sneezes on and profusely licks their food prior to bringing it to work. I know I will.

The the ignorant person who stole my lunch between yesterday and today: I just wanted to let you know that I have strep throat and you'll notice I had partially eaten the food. Don't be surprised if you get sick.

related: It must have been a pretty big bite

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/12/05/its-not-funny-its-my-sandwich/feed/ 138 Can I lick it? http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/10/08/can-i-lick-it/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/10/08/can-i-lick-it/#comments Mon, 08 Oct 2007 04:18:01 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/10/08/can-i-lick-it/ No, you can’t  — at least not near the copy machine at Erin’s office in Indianapolis.

Please use the sticky finger & not saliva

Meanwhile, Alvaro’s office in Madrid is having licking issues of its own near the office coffee machine. (Translation: “Please do not lick this teaspoon/ it’s for collective use.”)

Please do not lick this teaspoon; it's for collective use

And the licking doesn’t stop there…

PUBLIC NOTICE: PLEASE REFRAIN FROM LICKING OUR WINDOWS

Do not Lick Pressurized Lumber

DO NOT LICK

DO NOT LICK FENCE

p.s. before you leave, please wipe your feet really good on the rhythm rug. kthx!

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