Entries Tagged as 'love & marriage'
Jo in Australia received this message from an ex-boyfriend via the dating site OKCupid. “This was where we met, so I guess he was trying to be poignant,” Jo says. “For obvious reasons,” — a.k.a. THEY WERE BROKEN UP — “I neglected to call him on his birthday. This clearly brought up more deep-seated self-esteem issues.” Nothin’ sexier than that!
“Replying to him is out of the question,” Jo adds — “I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of words.” Instead, she took the passive-aggressive approach: submitting it to this site.
related: So glad we’re not together!
Tags: Australia · birthday · ex drama · just not that into you · online dating · thanks (but not really)
It all started when Erin in Toronto sent her uncle a Christmas card. Actually, scratch that — it all started three years ago, at Erin’s wedding, the last time Erin actually saw her uncle in person.
Before the wedding, Erin explains, “Linda (my uncle’s girlfriend) RSVP’d that she’d attend, and then then didn’t bother to show up, meaning we had to pay for her meal anyway.” (Not that she’s bitter about that or anything!) “Since then,” Erin says, “I assumed they had broken up and have addressed the annual Christmas card to just my uncle and cousin.”
Now, while that might sound a bit hasty (or even, dare I say…passive-aggressive), in Erin’s defense, the Christmas cards she received were only signed by her uncle and cousin — this year’s included. And yet, in what appears to be a last-minute back-of-the-envelope calculation, “Linda chose this year to remind me that she was still kicking around,” Erin says.
On the flip side of things, receiving mail addressed to one’s ex can be a disturbing experience as well. I’d say this intercepted message speaks for itself.
related: There are NO pre-paid legal executives (OR FEMALES!) living here!
Tags: Christmas · ex drama · family · going postal · Oops? · Texas · Toronto · weddings and bridezillas
The following message is a bit long, yes, but I had to post it because it reads uncannily like what I imagine as the epistolary novel of the future — complete with an unreliable narrator à la the Adrian Mole Diaries (or the sub-par American ripoff, Youth in Revolt).
It comes to us from Helen in Northern Ireland, who gives the following backstory: ”So, I met a friend of a friend on a night out and he offered to ‘walk me home.’ Seeing right through that clever ruse, I left, only to be bombarded with no fewer than four texts, a Facebook message and a voicemail all saying some inebriated yet romantic things.”
Months later, Helen ran into a mutual friend of this would-be Lothario, and casually said something along the lines of, ‘He tried to walk me home once, but I think he is a bit strange.’ Shortly thereafter, she received this gem of a Facebook message. “Luckily,” Helen says, “he removed and blocked me from Facebook immediately after sending it. Nice chap!”
related: And women like u wonder why u get judged and labeled shallow
Tags: Facebook · just an asshole · just not that into you · oh no you didn't · spurned lover · TL;DR · U.K.
Scix in Salt Lake City, Utah found this Valentine tucked into a book at a local thrift store run by the Mormon Church. “The idea of using any edition of The Rules to get your kids married is kind of scary,” he says, but imagining the sweet, naive Mormon mom behind it (doing EVERYTHING IN HER POWER) makes it kind of cute…if a bit absurd.
related: We are sure you will be a beautiful bride, but…
Tags: nice stationery · Salt Lake City · signed with love · weddings and bridezillas
Katie in Oklahoma City was cleaning out a box of wedding memorabilia when she rediscovered this note from her mother, written just after she paid for Katie’s wedding dress.
Although I know a lot of brides who would have immediately ripped this card (and the enclosed check) to bits, Katie accepted the gift with impressively good humor. “I found it funny,” she says, “because it’s just the way my Mom is. She signed my Dad’s name too, but it’s from her…just her.”
“Oh, and just FYI,” Katie adds, “I think I weighed 115 pounds at the time this note was written.”
related: Loose lips shrink hips?
extra credit: We hope there’s a Borg scale for every bride! [LIFE magazine, 1961]
Tags: "helpful" advice · a little insensitive · hey fatty · Moms & Dads · money · most popular notes of 2010 · Mother-daughter notes · oh no you didn't · Oklahoma · signed with love · weddings and bridezillas
Gail in Pennsylvania says the Ann Taylor Loft store at her local mall has a small table stocked with paper and crayons — “an offering to the busy mother who has been forced to bring her pesky little children along for a shopping trip.”
When she took a closer look at the table’s scribblings, however, she had to chuckle at the sitcom-like image of a grown man stuffed into one those kiddie-sized chairs. Adds Gail: “I wonder if Greg’s wife ever saw her wonderful husband’s little PA note to the world? Well, here’s her chance!”
related: Happy reinforcing gender stereotypes day!
Tags: actually totally reasonable · battle of the sexes · martyr complex · message to all intended for one · Pennsylvania · retail hell · sig o
Facebook: always there to remind you of all the fun you’re not having.
related: Socializing (you’re doing it wrong)
Tags: Facebook · frenemies · preggers · weddings and bridezillas
As a Valentine’s Day gift to you all, I present you with this epic love story (which Teddie in Minneapolis discovered pinned to the bulletin board in his apartment building).
Teddie’s love note to this love note: “I love that this person (he? she?) used commas, ellipses, and possibly a semicolon, but no periods. I also love how the all-caps rant in the middle segues into a plea to be Myspace friends again with an offhand ‘anyway.’ Also, what happened to her dad?”
Oh, Charles. You are so SUPER ATTRACTIVE I can hardly help myself. Deseray doesn’t know what’s she missing!
related: perfect for each other
Tags: ex drama · Minneapolis/St. Paul · p.s. · runaway run-on sentences · spelling and grammar police · spurned lover · TL;DR · WTF? · xoxo · You call that punctuation?
Writes Brittney in California: “Apparently, my mom’s boyfriend was stuck with an insufficient amount of toilet paper, and being passive aggressive (because he really is) he decides to write a note about it and stick it on the mirror, rather than confront her.”
And, in the end….everybody loses!
related: I’m not here to wipe your dirty butt
Tags: California · rebuttals · sad face · sig o · smiley · toilet paper
On a lark, Michelle in Florida posted a profile on the online dating site OKCupid after taking one of the site’s quizzes late one night, allowing the site to pull most of her interests and whatnot from Facebook.
“I didn’t think anything more of it,” she says, that is, until she got this “helpful” message — apparently one adjunct university professor’s idea of a charming conversation starter.
Tags: "helpful" advice · online dating · unsolicited feedback