Entries Tagged as 'moms & dads'

thanks for the geography lesson, dad!

November 2nd, 2009 · 145 Comments

our anonymous submitter from chicago says she and her four siblings recently received this somewhat cryptic e-mail from dear old dad. explains a: “the initials refer to our names (and spouses’ names, where applicable). dad lives in west bloomfield. i’m pretty sure it means he wants us to visit?”

related: love, dad

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Tags: e-mail · guilt trip · illinois · moms & dads

yeah, so your mom does live here. point being?

August 20th, 2009 · 108 Comments

k, so, we’ve all seen a million notes like this…

(check out that sad little orphan S!)
 
 
 
…but it actually takes a real mother to poke a hole in that logic.

related: your mother doesn’t work here. or here. or here.

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Tags: moms & dads · p.s. · signed with love · smiley · your mother doesn't... · your/you're

daddy’s little smartass

August 16th, 2009 · 46 Comments

nick in florida was in his car one day, when he “pulled up at a light, looked to my left, and immediately started laughing.” he quickly pulled out his iphone, snapped a photo, then get stepped on the gas before daddy dearest could get out and beat the crap out of him.

meanwhile, lisa in maryland [...]

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Tags: car · florida · kids · maryland · moms & dads · smartass · smiley

(you know the book)

August 6th, 2009 · 187 Comments

our submitter from honolulu lives with two roommates…in a house that belongs to one of those roommate’s parents. (mayday! mayday!)
one day, apparently, mother dearest decided to come over for an unannounced visit. surprise!

(click to enlarge)
related: i can has guilt trip?

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Tags: Hawaii · cleaning · guilt trip · jesus · moms & dads

but a mother’s love is the best gift of all…right?

July 29th, 2009 · 116 Comments

andrea in beaver dam, wisconsin says her friend mckenna woke up on her 19th birthday to find this note on the counter from mom.
(you can tell it’s heartfelt because of the underlining.)

related: when a card just won’t do

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Tags: birthday · moms & dads · wisconsin

love, dad

July 26th, 2009 · 104 Comments

while returning a long-lost battery charger, kaitlin’s dad echoes the sentiments of parents with adult children everywhere.

meanwhile, sarah in greenville, s.c. shows the downside of giving in to parents’ nagging for unfettered access.

related: why you should not be facebook friends with your parents

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · facebook · moms & dads · san francisco · signed with love · south carolina

and those cheetos were my baby’s yellow dye #6

June 26th, 2009 · 90 Comments

this (long-overdue) all-staff e-mail is like a fetus-sized version of one of my favorite self-righteous masterpieces. (how this one got buried in my inbox for so long, i have no idea.)
it comes to us courtesy of jennifer in chapel hill, n.c., who notes: “in this instance, ‘local users,’ is everyone in our corporate hq — [...]

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Tags: all-staff e-mail · moms & dads · north carolina · office · preggers · stealing

subtle on the nose, with an oddly cloying finish

June 24th, 2009 · 55 Comments

writes devra in san luis obispo, california:  “i’m visiting my parents in napa, where they both work at wineries. they recently found out that i smoke cigarettes, and though i’m sure they disapprove, there has been little to no discussion on the matter. my mom wanted me to go with her to a tasting today, [...]

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Tags: moms & dads · odor · smiley · smoking

happy reinforcing gender stereotypes day!

June 21st, 2009 · 112 Comments

writes jim in colorado: “when i attempt to cook, i typically use way too many pots, pans and utensils and sometimes tend to skip instructions. (i actually made hard boiled eggs and set the smoke detectors off.) anyway, the other night i made cheeseburger pie and forgot to precook the meat. i woke up the next morning [...]

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Tags: food · kitchen · moms & dads

if she were really passive-aggressive, she’d get the fence secretly electrified

May 18th, 2009 · 168 Comments

writes chris in riverside, california: “my friend eric essentially has a LAN center in his garage. cigarettes and energy drinks are the diet of choice and we (usually 5 to 7 people lanning there at any given time) piss on his fence so we don’t flush the toilet too many times over the evening.  he [...]

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Tags: actually totally reasonable · california · moms & dads · piss · smoking · toilet

is your babysitter trying to get in your kid’s pants?

May 15th, 2009 · 336 Comments

so, i pretty much have a policy of not posting notes submitted by the people who wrote them. i made an exception for this one because i think the really passive-aggressive part of the story is the behavior that inspired it. you might disagree. nonetheless — on to the backstory, from an anonymous dad in [...]

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Tags: MYOB · moms & dads · north carolina

thanks, mom, for reminding me why i moved out in the first place

May 10th, 2009 · 93 Comments

writes our anonymous submitter: “i’m the oldest of four girls, none of whom are living at home. in fact, we’re all currently living in different states. my mom resents the fact that we don’t want to spend the rest of our lives living under her roof. on mother’s day she screened my call, then mass-texted [...]

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Tags: e-mail · martyr complex · moms & dads · text message

i’ll have u know

May 6th, 2009 · 290 Comments

a busy working mom in austin, texas got this little love note on her blackberry from her sixteen-year-old son. (michael is his friend, by the way,  not the craft store.)

in the end, our submitter adds, he didn’t take the bus after all. total bluff!
related: friends don’t lie 2 friends

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Tags: austin · e-mail · high school · kids today · moms & dads · signed with love · spelling and grammar police

really, mom, you shouldn’t have

April 19th, 2009 · 90 Comments

writes our anonymous submitter: “unable to visit my mother last year for mother’s day, my partner and i sent her a box of chocolate truffles and an antique brooch. this is her ‘thank you’ note (which is really more like a ‘fuck you’ note).”

the final “fuck you,” of course, is the nearly indecipherable handwriting. here’s [...]

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Tags: moms & dads · thanks (but not really)

why you should not be facebook friends with your parents…or grandparents

April 8th, 2009 · 140 Comments

writes halley in idaho: “yeahhh, that’s my mom and my grandpa right there. (this is what happens when old people join facebook.)”

related: busted by facebook
extra credit: facebook embroidery

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Tags: birthday · facebook · moms & dads · old folks

wanna touch the baby?

April 6th, 2009 · 372 Comments

“my co-worker had a ‘meet our bundle of joy’ party in a common space of his apartment building,” says our anonymous submitter in new york city, and these notes were peppered throughout the space.
he adds: “not only did i opt out of ‘touching’ their baby, i also passed on digging into the bowl of ruffles.”

meanwhile, [...]

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Tags: "helpful" advice · CAPS LOCK · hygiene · moms & dads · new york

i’m calling your bluff on this one, mom

March 4th, 2009 · 76 Comments

amy spotted this attached to a mailbox in monroe, north carolina. writes amy:  “i have no idea which flower it was (there were many that were still left on the porch), but i was impressed by the effort the victim took with this note — it was written on poster board and left up for [...]

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Tags: birthday · guilt trip · moms & dads · north carolina · plants · sad face

just wait ’til he finds out the truth about the whole “fat guy down the chimney” thing

December 22nd, 2008 · 85 Comments

sarah from san fran was taking a little stroll in berkeley, california last december when she saw a house that clearly belonged to the “more is more” school of holiday decorating.
you know the type: “giant candy canes, red bows, lights, even one of those life-sized plastic snow globes that blows confetti snow all around inside [...]

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Tags: guilt trip · holiday spirit · moms & dads · stealing · vandalism

it’s on my dresser, next to my rolling papers

October 27th, 2008 · 125 Comments

jeff in grand blanc, michigan says one of his friends found this note on her bed one day when she came home from school. (and no, you can’t go live there.)

related: passive (voice) abuse

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Tags: drugs · laundry · michigan · moms & dads · visual aids

cloudy with a chance of hate mail

August 14th, 2008 · 241 Comments

for their daughter’s first birthday, mr. and mrs. schmidt decided it would be fun to throw a casual little backyard get-together at their home in rochester, minnesota.
like the good church-going minnesotans they are, the schmidts sent out this e-mail invite to their small-ish congregation of about 200 people, expecting maybe 20 or 30 to stop [...]

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · birthday · minnesota · moms & dads · spelling and grammar police