Entries Tagged as 'most popular notes of 2010'

You burned my feelings

April 26th, 2010 · 206 Comments

One Saturday, John was in the basement watching the end of a football game when his 8-year-old daughter came down to ask when they’d be leaving for the beach. Just another 20 minutes or so, he told her.

“Eventually, the game ended and we went out,” John says. “But when I went to bed that night, I found this note sitting on my pillow. The tragedy of it all, combined with the warning — and offset by the pretty border and the flower — really make for a lovely package.”

Never put nature aside for telivision [sic]. You burned my feelings today, and I am warning you never to do what you did today again.

related: Mad, but not mad enough to forego a French braid

Tags: Father-daughter notes · football · guilt trip · kids · Minneapolis/St. Paul · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · TV · warning

My Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Parents

April 14th, 2010 · 129 Comments

When I was a kid, my mother liked to say that I had a “flair for the dramatic.” Just ask her about the My Little Pony sewing machine she promised — I mean crossed her heart and hoped to die promised — that I could have when I turned six. (I’m still waiting.)

If only my parents had sent my temper-tantrum-throwing little bratty self to time-out armed with pencil and paper! Then we might have precious mementos like this one, written by the youngest daughter of our anonymous submitter from Pennsylvania. After being sent to her room for bad behavior, darling daughter — “a chronic notewriter” — slipped this under the door for her parents to discover.

Dear Mom and Dad don't bother to give me dinner im [sic] not that hungry - From The saddest person in the world

(The crossed-out “Love” is what kills me.) And of course, it’s not just little girls who resort to such melodrama.

As Sara in Phoenix explains, ”My husband and I were outside one evening, deaf to the ‘screams’ of my 9-year-old son, Eliot. Apparently, he was in his room and bumped his fish tank, causing a small amount of water to slosh out, and he panicked. When we came back inside, we found the above note shoved under our bedroom door. Upon examination of said fish tank, we could find zero evidence of leak-springing…but then, we were also laughing pretty hard at the indignant note — especially its closing and postscript.”

Dear Mommy & Jon  You almost cost the life of my bob my fish. It sprung a leak, next time if you here me screaming 'HELP MY FISH TANK SPRUNG A LEAK, PLEASE HELP ME Come Help Me' COME HELP worringly, eliot P.S. It was temporary

Adds Sara: “P.S. Bob is fine.”

related: The joys of motherhood

Tags: guilt trip · kids · martyr complex · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · p.s.

Completely valid rebuttals

March 30th, 2010 · 103 Comments

More proof that — no matter how in the right you are — writing a note about it makes you kind of an airhose, too. Especially if you’re using Comic Sans.

From Elizabeth at CMU in Pittsburgh:

Do you leave annoying notes in the hall? You just might be self-righteous.

And from Drake at BYU in Provo, Utah:

DO NOT LEAN ON AIRHOSE!!! DON'T USE COMIC SANS!!! Better than Papyrus. TrueBetter than Papyrus. True

related: Please pickup your prints pomptly

extra credit: The man behind Comic Sans [wsj.com]

Tags: college life · Comic Sans Alert · door-slamming · most popular notes of 2010 · rebuttals · Utah

There are crazy people out there, you know

March 26th, 2010 · 177 Comments

“We custom-ordered some stamps with our youngest daughter’s face on it to mail birthday party invitations,” writes Pablo in Virginia. “There were extras, so we used them to pay some bills.” Apparently, one of those envelope recipients found this small act of thrift somewhat less than adorable.

Dear Tenant, This postage stamp is an outrage! If this is in fact your daughter or if you have any relation to this child, Alexis...do you realize you're exploiting her to the public? You stuck a picture of a child on an envelope with your return address...Anyone could get a hold of this and do god knows what...there are crazy people out there you know! You should think twice before flaunting your child to the world. Have a lovely day, God bless.

Adds Pablo: “The creepy part? This note was deposited in our mailbox anonymously, making us think the real crazy person is the author.”

related: Cloudy with a chance of hate mail

Tags: crazypants · going postal · kids · kinda creepy · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · pleasantries as afterthought · Virginia

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got Call of Duty 4 on pause

March 22nd, 2010 · 88 Comments

Jack and Sarah in Tacoma, Washington both spotted this note taped to the window of a coffee shop outside the Fort Lewis military base in Tillicum. While I particularly enjoy the slow crescendo of this note, I’m not sure the manager of the H&R Block across the street would feel the same.

Dear Tillicum Thieves, While I appreciate your initiative and hard work I'd like to suggest you not break our window. There is an H&R Block across the street and I'm certain their computers are much newer and nicer than ours. I live in the neighborhood and would appreciate you not stealing from a local non-profit that provides services to soldiers and veterans. Also, I will shoot you in the fucking face. Thanks! The Management

related: Raging against the little guy

Tags: most popular notes of 2010 · not-so-veiled threats · stealing · vandalism · Washington state

How’s that for a low price guarantee?

March 16th, 2010 · 119 Comments

Wayne and his son were watching the Kite Festival in Huntington Beach, California when they noticed these signs outside a shop on the pier. Says Wayne: “It was a cool store.”

LOW PRICE GUARANTEE  We guarantee that you can ALWAYS find something for at least a little less than what you bought it for if you look long and hard enough. What's the point? You're here now.

PRICES SUBJECT TO CHANGE BASED ON CUSTOMER ATTITUDE - WE OFFER EXTREMELY HIGH QUALITY & EXTREMELY LOW PRICES....PICK ONE

HAGGLING POLICY  You're in Huntington Beach, Tijuana is about 3 hours south. Our pricing is excellent, and our service is even better. However, if you still want to try for entertainment value, we always enjoy an exceptional effort.

Approved Discounts

related: Just plane rude

Tags: "customer service" · blitzkrieg approach · CAPS LOCK · most popular notes of 2010 · retail hell

Launching a cannonball at the breeders

March 9th, 2010 · 284 Comments

Emily in Richmond, Virginia says this note was recently posted in her apartment building, “right next to a note complaining about a) the tenants in the building that have parties and don’t clean up the beer that gets left in the hallways and b) the laziness of the dog owners in the building that don’t pick up their dogs’ poop.”

If your baby cries all night-shut it up. No one wants to hear about your fucking MISTAKE! sorry if its been 12 FUCKING HOURS but not every1 is stupid and has to wake up early because of CRYING ASSHOLE. get the fuck over living in an apartment! WAH!!

related: Wanna touch the baby?

Tags: exclamation-point happy!!!! · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · kids · more aggressive than passive · most popular notes of 2010 · neighbors · noise · Richmond · spelling and grammar police

The joys of motherhood

March 2nd, 2010 · 141 Comments

Writes Sarah: “This note was written to me after I told my seven-year-old daughter to go to her room until she felt like being nice. I’m still trying to figure out what she really feels. Was it love mingled with regret…or slathering me with goodness in hopes of ending the misery in her room? Somehow I still think she meant what she originally said. Motherhood rocks!!!!”

I <3 U Mommy Dear Mom, You are my favorit [sic] mommy ever. I'm sorry for calling you a piece of poo. And I hate you and not going to my room. I love you Mommy  Love, your dauttre [sic] Karah

Meanwhile, Laura in California writes: ”My six-year-old daughter misbehaved at school, so she couldn’t go to the harvest festival. This didn’t go over well, so she wrote me this threatening note. When I laughed, she took it back to add ‘I (am) serious.’”

No luving Maggie in less you let me go I serious am

And it’s not just the girls. Liev in Gainesville, Georgia received this from her six-year-old son when — while trying to get dinner on the table for five kids clamoring for her attention — she had to tell him she did not have time to look at his latest Lego creation right this second. “This is his drawing of me yelling at him. The thing above him is his broken heart.”

The joys of motherhood

related: Mad, but not made enough to forego a French braid

Tags: art · heart · kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · not-so-veiled threats · signed with love · spelling and grammar police

Counter attack

February 25th, 2010 · 196 Comments

“Personally, I think all places should post this sign,” says Molly in Los Angeles.

We cordially ask that you...  Refrain from Call Phone Use At the Counter and Register  It's not that we don't appreciate your busy schedules, it's just nauseatingly rude and makes us feel less than human.  Thank You! -the people on the other side of the counter.

These days, it appears a lot of cash register-operators agree with Molly (and the fancy shop in Studio City where she buys her cheese).

To wit: exhibit a, from Betsey in Sumter, S.C.

Counter attack

Exhibit b) spotted by Otto at a sandwich shop in Frisco, Colorado

I wold love to take your order, As soon as you get off your Phone. -Thanx!!!

And so on and so forth.

But I’d like to draw your attention to this piece,  spotted by Jenna at a Pathmark pharmacy in Bayshore, New York, as a true masterpiece of the genre. With just a few carefully crafted words, it transforms this common sentiment into the ultimate in shame-inducing passive-aggression.

We promise...we won't interrupt you while you are on the phone. That would be rude of us.

related: Top five musical crimes perpetrated by record store customers in the 90s and 2000s

Tags: "customer service" · actually totally reasonable · California · cell phone · Colorado · etiquette · most popular notes of 2010 · New York · oh snap · South Carolina

Can you dig it?

February 21st, 2010 · 364 Comments

“When I first moved to Chicago,” says Mike, “my grandfather told me about parking in the winter. One would dig out a spot and insert a chair, reserving the spot for your trouble.” One of his neighbors, it seems, didn’t get the benefit of such grandfatherly wisdom.

Dear Transplant, You obviously haven't lived in Chicago long.

Neither, apparently, did Chris…who made the mistake of parking in an empty space outside his friend’s house in Chicago for few hours. When he got home, he found this note affixed to his mirror with glue.

Thanks for being so rude by parking in the space that I shoveled out for my family.

And of course, Chicago isn’t the only city that takes its snow-shoveling etiquette seriously.

Just ask Anna in New Jersey…

This table is not trash, it is mine. I am using it to mark my parking spot that I so diligently shoveled out twice yesterday.

Or Brooke in Indianapolis…

I spent 3.5 hours over 2 days to shovel this parking space out so i could get to work and earn a paycheck. Since parking on the street is my only option at the moment, I would ask that you respect my hard work in shoveling myself out and NOT take my spot to park.  Have your business spend money to plow your spots in front of your business if you would like a clean spot to park.  Regards, A homeowner with a sore back from shoveling so much snow!!!

Or Amy in Washington, D.C…

Dear "Neighbor": I'm sure you thought the Recycling Bin and Trash Bags were just there for decoration. When a person spends hours digging out a parking spot through two separate snowstorms, she has a right to park there upon her return.

Or Larry in Silver Spring, Maryland…

NOT COOL!!  You didn't take 3 hours to shovel this spot OUT!!  This is MY parking spot!!

Or Kristin in Pittsburgh…

PLEASE DON'T PARK HERE (or I will totally lose my shit!!)

Olivia in Albany…

Don't think about parking here   Shovel your own space  Thank you   Have a nice day

Or Chris in Boston…where they’re always keepin’ it classy.

Hey fucking asshole the barrel was there for a reason. I didn't shovel out the spot that you could park your shitbox in it you fucking dickhead.

related: Boston, a place for friends

Tags: Chicago · etiquette · most popular notes of 2010 · neighbors · parking · snow