Three U.S. cities where nature-lovers might want to keep their hands to themselves:

1. Austin, Texas

2. Macon, Georgia

3. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

(Thanks to Don in Austin, Elizabeth in Macon, and Jasmine in Pittsburgh for risking the wrath of some devoted gardening/second amendment enthusiasts to document these warnings.)

related: No “questions” asked

Writes Michael in Milton Keynes, England: “I have an ex-service ambulance which I use as a van. I had parked it on the road round the corner from me for a couple of weeks, and after two days I got a call from the town council’s abandoned vehicle unit. Then I got a few calls from the police. Today, when I decided to move it, I found this note on the window. I was almost tempted to buy something and abandon it there for real now…but that would be bad, wouldn’t it?”

related: But He took the wheel

This note from a “friendly neighbor” was put through the mailslot of Dan’s apartment in the heart of South Philly. Says Dan: “I wanted to put ‘thanks for the advice!’ on the door in response, but thought better of it.”

As infuriating as the note was, “I do love how they phoned in the underlining on ‘of’ and ‘the,’ then went to town with ‘curb,’” Dan says. “Thank you, friendly neighbor, for the best piece of bulletin board material I’ve ever gotten.”

related: Two birds with one snowman

When Sheena in Austin spotted this note on her neighbor’s front door, she couldn’t help but wonder: “If your doormat has sentimental value, maybe it should be hanging on your wall instead of sitting on the ground?”

related: Wrath mat

extra credit: Sentimental value: clothing stories from eBay

Christoph found this polite and friendly note on the door of his apartment in San Francisco. a reasonable enough request, to be sure, except for the fact that — despite his neighbor’s claimed omniscience — “I don’t own any exercise equipment.”

Admits Christoph: “The sound in question was likely a swivel chair…and my habit of rolling back and forth on it at 2 a.m.”

Meanwhile, Kate spotted this lonely stair-climber in the front yard of a nearby house in Snohomish, Washington. “It made me wonder whose stairmaster it really was,” Kate says, “and who wrote the note.” (A newly self-aware infomercial enthusiast? A bitter spouse?)

Alas, Kate says, “We may never know. The underused piece of exercise equipment was gone by morning.”

related: If you needed an excuse to skip the gym today
extra credit: The hawaii chair [youtube.com]

Where do you suppose this “anomous” Tampa, Florida resident stands on the whole nature-vs.-nurture debate?

Interested? here’s a free preview!

related: Your to lazy

Spotted in a high foot traffic area of Sausalito, California…

God bless the Bay area.

related: Gentrification is insanit(ar)y

Writes an anonymous submitter in Houston: “A neighbor in my building put up an Obama yard sign on the door of her apartment around the time of the Texas primary. When it disappeared, I assumed she took it down herself.”

Then up went this note — a cheerful bit of propaganda that oh-so-subtly disproves all those ugly stereotypes about “self-righteous Obama supporters” with a colorful blaze of moralistic tsk-tsking and First-Amendment flag-waving. (Woo! Obama ’08!)

related: A little bit of shameless gloating