Entries Tagged as 'noise'

Launching a cannonball at the breeders

March 9th, 2010 · 284 Comments

Emily in Richmond, Virginia says this note was recently posted in her apartment building, “right next to a note complaining about a) the tenants in the building that have parties and don’t clean up the beer that gets left in the hallways and b) the laziness of the dog owners in the building that don’t [...]

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Tags: exclamation-point happy! · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · kids · more aggressive than passive · neighbors · noise · richmond · spelling and grammar police

A review of last night’s performance

February 17th, 2010 · 193 Comments

Aleister in London found this critique slipped under his door after an impromptu Thursday night sing-along.  “I am a big fan of my neighbours’ critical opinion,” Alastair says. “I won’t offer much defense other than that our music selection was exceptional and I was on my way to work when I found it.”
Well done, Flat [...]

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Tags: actually totally reasonable · london · neighbors · noise

WiFi for passive-aggressives

December 30th, 2009 · 169 Comments

When even leaving a note is too direct…you folks with wireless networks still named “linksys” or “trendnet” are clearly missing out on a priceless opportunity to piss off your neighbors.

(Thanks to submitters Paul in St. Paul, Stirling in Salt Lake City, Arcadiy in Seattle, Denise in Rochester, Sara in Berkeley, Liz in Austin, and Breanne [...]

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Tags: dogs · neighbors · noise · sex sex sex

Really professional, for real.

December 27th, 2009 · 56 Comments

Writes our (only slightly embittered) submitter in Connecticut: “My coworker works the receiving department in a car parts warehouse. Even though he works in a warehouse he likes to pretend he works in an office by sitting at his workstation all day working on ‘problems.’ He put this up because apparently people actually doing work [...]

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Tags: bold underlined italics · noise · spelling and grammar police

Do these stilettos match my broomstick?

December 9th, 2009 · 261 Comments

Sarah in London found this note — and the cheeky response — posted in the lobby of her former apartment building.
“Entry to the flats is by way of a concrete outside walkway,” she explains. “Unfortunately, if someone has noisy heels, the sound tends to reverberate throughout the building.”

Of course, the above complainer isn’t the only [...]

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Tags: exclamation-point happy! · london · neighbors · noise · rainbow-colored · signed with love · smartass · that's disrespectful

euphemisms of disturb

December 2nd, 2009 · 334 Comments

Our submitter in Dublin, California was leaving her apartment for work one morning when she found this syntactically-challenged note stuck to the door. “I assume my anonymous complaining neighbor has the wrong apartment number because A.) My husband and I do not have children and B.) For all but one of the dates listed no [...]

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Tags: california · neighbors · noise · sex sex sex · spelling and grammar police

the good samaritan

September 17th, 2009 · 204 Comments

Julia in Australia attended a New Year’s Eve party in an affluent neighborhood. The next morning, after she came to, she realized her digital camera was missing. when she back to search for it, she found this sign posted up all around the local park.

related: oh, the rancher and the mcmansioner should be friends
extra credit: [...]

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Tags: actually totally reasonable · australia · drizzunk · neighbors · noise · p.s. · the po-po

just a rat in a cage

September 10th, 2009 · 174 Comments

Writes Leslie in London: “Janine was having some serious keyboard RAGE and posted this request to our office’s online help desk…which every single person in the company can see…including Daniel.”

This post is dedicated to my cube-mate Leah, who recently received a surprise “gift” — a quiet-touch keyboard — from our boss, which succeeded in making [...]

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Tags: london · noise · office

Can you hear me now, biotch?

July 22nd, 2009 · 160 Comments

Our anonymous submitter — a college student in Michigan — “borrowed” this note under the pretense of reading it to empathize with the recipient. “While the note itself is straight up aggressive,” she says, “I do know that it has followed months of passive-aggressiveness.” And most of these complaints, she says, are totally legit. “I’ve [...]

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Tags: hygiene · michigan · noise · roommates · that shit is disgusting · university

Get your “nozzle” off my “hose”

July 20th, 2009 · 128 Comments

“We’ve had trouble with our downstairs neighbors since we moved in,” says Sara in Madison. “Well, really just one of them, a woman in her fifties.” This neighbor’s most recent dose of crazy appeared in the mailbox Sara shares with her roommate (“Little Buddy,” in crazy lady-speak).

I kinda prefer this note without any explanation whatsoever, [...]

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · crazypants · neighbors · noise · old folks · wisconsin

A text from the big guy upstairs (or downstairs)

June 15th, 2009 · 131 Comments

As far as he can tell, Chris in Portland thinks this anonymous text was sent by his downstairs neighbor after a morning of hitting the snooze button one too many times. “Needless to say,” Chris admits, “this was not the first time I had ignored the alarm  clock.”
What’s strange, Chris says, is that he has [...]

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Tags: cell phone · neighbors · noise · portland · text message

tap tap revenge

May 19th, 2009 · 158 Comments

Our anonymous submitter found this on his keyboard at work one morning. His sheepish explanation? “I guess I really get into the music on my iPod…”
Admittedly, the note-writer has a point — that shit is annoying, yo! — but the contrarian in me still thinks the rest of the office needs to chip in and [...]

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Tags: arizona · music · noise · office · scottsdale

just sayin’

May 1st, 2009 · 121 Comments

Passive-aggressive? Oh, heavens no! These are just a few selfless public service announcements.
From an office in Oregon…

New Zealand…

and Kentucky…

related: the overly friendly coworker: ruining your day since you held the elevator for her that one time

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · kentucky · noise · odor · office · oregon

definitely not kosher for passover

April 2nd, 2009 · 166 Comments

our anonymous submitter in tel aviv spotted this note outside the kitchenette of a client’s office. in case your hebrew is a little rusty, she also provided an english translation:
please feel free to pour drinks, cut up food, warm things through, stir and mix food, chop food up very small, taste things and eat until [...]

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Tags: hebrew · kitchen · noise · office · shit · the middle east

On jamming

April 1st, 2009 · 205 Comments

This note is so goddamn beautiful that if i just saw this floating around on Digg or something, I’d probably assume it was fake. And yet, Marta in Vancouver swears it’s for real.
She explains: “The guy who lives in one of the basement suites in our house left this on our front door after we [...]

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Tags: TLDR · canada · crazypants · music · neighbors · noise · vancouver

suck on this!

February 9th, 2009 · 98 Comments

passed along by the unfortunate hacker in question from littleton, colorado…

related: stay home!!!

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Tags: e-mail · heartwarming compassion · illness · noise · office · oh no you didn't

a new year’s resolution?

January 7th, 2009 · 237 Comments

liza, a student at mississippi state university, was up late one night writing a paper when her roommate asked her to stop — the noise of her typing was keeping her up. “i had a paper to write and i didn’t think i was making enough noise to warrant moving my workstation outside, so, i [...]

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Tags: meta · mississippi · noise · rebuttals · university

the slow build

October 9th, 2008 · 106 Comments

like so many passive-aggressive notewriters, the author of this note — which sarah in brockton, mass. says was posted in the elevator, front hallway, back hallway and the mailroom of her building after a particularly rowdy friday — just can’t seem to fully commit to sarcasm as a rhetorical technique.

(you know, because otherwise people [...]

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Tags: massachusetts · neighbors · noise · thanks (but not really)

buskers & broomsticks

September 18th, 2008 · 205 Comments

zora zero spotted this ongoing street-musician spat in portobello road market, london.

i’m not a londoner, but living near portobello road and complaining about the buskers seems like living near times square and complaining about the lights, no? i was cheered, therefore, to see the responses added by other more busker-friendly neighbo(u)rs at the bottom of [...]

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · cry me a fuckin' river · london · music · neighbors · noise · p.s. · saga · u.k.

just doing their part to uphold the reputation of americans abroad

September 2nd, 2008 · 119 Comments

edward says this sign was posted on every floor and inside all the elevators at the hotel that headquartered ucla’s study abroad program in granada, spain last semester.

can you blame them? i mean, really — what a waste of perfectly good manchego!

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Tags: actually totally reasonable · cheese · espana · exclamation-point happy! · noise · spain · university

the two-word compromise you’re looking for: zip wire

August 3rd, 2008 · 182 Comments

an anonymous submitter in ann arbor, michigan received this e-mail from a guy who just moved into her co-op (“basically a co-ed frat house”) for the rest of the summer. “we’ve tried to reason with him,” she says, to no avail. “when asked why he has to get up so early, he says, ‘i have [...]

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Tags: and that's an order · drizzunk · e-mail · michigan · noise · questionable logic · roommates · sleeping · spelling and grammar police · thanks (but not really) · university

i do, however, have a very charming coat rack

July 17th, 2008 · 150 Comments

christoph found this polite and friendly note on the door of his apartment in san francisco. a reasonable enough request, to be sure, except for the fact that — despite his neighbor’s claimed omniscience — “i don’t own any exercise equipment.”

(admits christoph: “it was likely a swivel chair…and my habit of rolling back and forth [...]

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Tags: a little patronizing · irregular capitalization · neighbors · noise · san francisco · washington

there will come soft pains

July 7th, 2008 · 239 Comments

this bit of poetry is brought to us by alex in vancouver, an innocent observer on the scene.

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Tags: drizzunk · noise · roommates · sleeping · thanks (but not really) · vancouver

TMI all around

June 23rd, 2008 · 119 Comments

daniel in new york spotted this note (and the follow-up) on the door of his soho office building’s restroom — “a nice single seater with a window.” adds daniel: “i understand the sentiment — my sphincter locks up like a vise with any distraction. but i do hope that the large white area on the [...]

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Tags: TMI · bathroom · cell phone · new york · noise · office · toilet

infinite note project

February 15th, 2008 · 87 Comments

faydra in gainesville, florida lives in an apartment complex she describes as “a step above dorm living” — 85 girls total, all of them coming and going at all hours. faydra’s next door neighbors kicked things off (with the most frightening clip art extravaganza ever) and things devolved from there. in chronological order:

related: a fancy [...]

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy! · florida · neighbors · noise · rebuttals · smiley