Entries Tagged as 'noise'
When even leaving a note is too direct…you folks with wireless networks still named “linksys” or “trendnet” are clearly missing out on a priceless opportunity to piss off your neighbors.
(Thanks to submitters Paul in St. Paul, Stirling in Salt Lake City, Arcadiy in Seattle, Denise in Rochester, Sara in Berkeley, Liz in Austin, Breanne in Oklahoma City, and Payal in Pleasanton, California…all of whom, no doubt, have secured wi-fi networks. Right, guys?)
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Tags: dogs · most popular notes of 2009 · neighbors · noise · sex sex sex
Writes our (only slightly embittered) submitter in Connecticut: “My coworker works the receiving department in a car parts warehouse. Even though he works in a warehouse he likes to pretend he works in an office by sitting at his workstation all day working on ‘problems.’ He put this up because apparently people actually doing work were drowning out his Rush Limbaugh broadcast.”
related: just sayin’
Tags: bold underlined italics · noise · spelling and grammar police
Sarah in London found this note — and the cheeky response — posted in the lobby of her former apartment building.
“Entry to the flats is by way of a concrete outside walkway,” she explains. “Unfortunately, if someone has noisy heels, the sound tends to reverberate throughout the building.”
Of course, the above complainer isn’t the only person who has a problem with stilettos…a.k.a. “fucking shoes”?
related: The two-word compromise you’re looking for: zip wire
Tags: door-slamming · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · irregular capitalization · London · neighbors · noise · rainbow-colored · shoes · signed with love · smartass · that's disrespectful
Our submitter in Dublin, California was leaving her apartment for work one morning when she found this syntactically-challenged note stuck to the door. “I assume my anonymous complaining neighbor has the wrong apartment number because A) My husband and I do not have children and B) For all but one of the dates listed no one was home to make any noise.”
She adds: ” We do, however, have other neighbors next door who are quite loud, and I’ve often been woken up to the sounds of moans, grunts and something heavy slamming into an adjoining wall.” (You know, just like that part in Big where they play pinball and jump on the trampoline!)
“When my husband saw this he laughed pretty hard and wondered aloud weather ‘kids jumping on the bed‘ was a euphemism for loud sex.”
related: Down and dirty down under (dear)
Tags: California · neighbors · noise · sex sex sex · spelling and grammar police
Julia in Australia attended a New Year’s Eve party in an affluent neighborhood. The next morning, after she came to, she realized her digital camera was missing. when she back to search for it, she found this sign posted up all around the local park.
related: oh, the rancher and the mcmansioner should be friends
extra credit: i’ll say sorry, but i’m not taking off my glasses [youtube]
Tags: actually totally reasonable · Australia · drizzunk · neighbors · noise · p.s. · the po-po
Writes Leslie in London: “My co-worker, Janine was having some serious keyboard RAGE and posted this request to our office’s online help desk, which every single person in the company can see…including Daniel.”
This post is dedicated to my cube-mate Leah, who recently received a surprise “gift” — a quiet-touch keyboard — from our boss, which succeeded in making her feel even more self-conscious about her “loud typing.”
Sadly, she observed, the IT department has no solution for the cringe-inducing sound our fellow coworker who insists on clipping her nails at her desk.
related: Suck on this!
Tags: London · noise · office
Our anonymous submitter — a college student in Michigan — “borrowed” this note under the pretense of reading it to empathize with the recipient. “While the note itself is straight up aggressive,” she says, “I do know that it has followed months of passive-aggressiveness.” And most of these complaints, she says, are totally legit. “I’ve been in the adjoining room while she’s in the bathroom and it’s pretty offensive.”
related: Your new best friend
Tags: college life · hygiene · Michigan · noise · roommates · that's disgusting
“We’ve had trouble with our downstairs neighbors since we moved in,” says Sara in Madison. “Well, really just one of them, a woman in her fifties.” This neighbor’s most recent dose of crazy appeared in the mailbox Sara shares with her roommate (“Little Buddy,” in crazy lady-speak).
I kinda prefer this note without any explanation whatsoever, but if you’re still craving more, Sara explains…sort of. “I had, in fact, bought and put a nozzle on the outside hose so I could spray down an animal cage. We do not, needless to say, have parties in the laundry room. In fact, we’ve never had a party, ever, because we’re too afraid of her.”
related: sheena is a paintballer
Tags: CAPS LOCK · crazypants · neighbors · noise · old folks · Wisconsin
As far as he can tell, Chris in Portland thinks this anonymous text was sent by his downstairs neighbor after a morning of hitting the snooze button one too many times. “Needless to say,” Chris admits, “this was not the first time I had ignored the alarm clock.”
What’s strange, Chris says, is that he has no idea how the neighbor got a hold of his cell phone number. “My only thought is that about a month prior to receiving this text, I left my phone number on a post-it on the front door of the building so the UPS delivery guy could get a hold of me. They must have held onto that number the whole time, just waiting for the absolute breaking point.”
Creepy…but kind of genius, right?
related: Recipe for roommate discord
Tags: cell phone · neighbors · noise · Portland · text message
Our anonymous submitter found this on his keyboard at work one morning. His sheepish explanation? “I guess I really get into the music on my iPod…”
Admittedly, the note-writer has a point — that shit is annoying, yo! — but the contrarian in me still thinks the rest of the office needs to chip in and get our submitter a set of these.
related: Suck on this!
Tags: Arizona · music · noise · office · Scottsdale