Entries Tagged as 'not-so-veiled threats'
September 26th, 2007 · 94 Comments
Sounds like somebody in this Seattle office is havin’ a little ‘roid rage.
What’s Muscle Milk, you ask? Well, say its makers, “Muscle Milk is arguably America’s favorite protein.” Apparently because unlike, say, chicken, Muscle Milk comes in flavors like “egg nog,” “chocolate banana crunch” and “root beer float.”
related: Try a bite
Tags: all-staff e-mail · CAPS LOCK · Comic Sans Alert · ellipses-crazed · not-so-veiled threats · office fridge · sarcasm · Seattle · spelling and grammar police · stealing
September 25th, 2007 · 79 Comments
From Jasmine in Georgia…
Tags: excessive underlining · Georgia · kids · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · rainbow-colored
“You know when you drink so much that you can’t remember what you did the night before?” asks our anonymous Scottish pizza bandit. “Sometimes we’re lucky enough to encounter certain things which trigger memories of our alcohol-fueled rampage. I was lucky enough to come across this the next day.”
Tags: fridge · guilt trip · not-so-veiled threats · pizza · roommates · sarcasm · Scotland · spelling and grammar police · stealing
Attention: corporate emergency in the Chicagoland area!
Meanwhile, in Seattle…
Adds our anonymous submitter, “All the glassware for all departments is washed by the poor lab slaves at least twice a day, and then promptly returned to the shelves. How much glassware are they using that they notice if a beaker or two went missing?”
Tags: a little uptight · and that's an order · Chicago · crazy boss · excessive underlining · not-so-veiled threats · office · office supplies · Seattle · spelling and grammar police
“Random people seem to have a lot of fun vandalizing Portland’s many bus stops,” says Kathryn. “Several of the stops I use frequently have had their schedules removed, which is oh-so-helpful. The other day when I went to the stop in front of my office to go home, I noticed this little note. They even took the time to laminate it!”
Tags: die bitch die · Portland · rhetorical question · vandalism
Craig from Nottingham, England snapped these at the pub where his cousin works. (Apologies for the blurriness — just pretend you’ve already knocked back a few pints.)
By the way, if you’d like to go meet Stephen and shake his hand, Craig says the name of the pub is The Flowing Spring, in Henley. Stephen seems like a kindred spirit to Desi’s New York dungeon master, no?
Tags: bar · CAPS LOCK · cleaning · crazy boss · excessive underlining · not-so-veiled threats · Nottingham · office · U.K.
September 10th, 2007 · 84 Comments
As this example from Winston-Salem, N.C. shows: hell hath no fury like a lactose-loving office worker.
The thief might be depending on the fridge’s contents as a source of food, but mercy? Don’t count on it.
Tags: cheese · itemized list · North Carolina · not-so-veiled threats · office · office fridge · stealing · Winston-Salem
Our anonymous submitter has held on to this e-mail for more than five years now, but she still has no idea what she did to offend the sender. She barely knew him at the time, she says, “and needless to say, I don’t know him any better now, except I have a better handle on his mental state.”
Tags: CAPS LOCK · e-mail · excessive underlining · not-so-veiled threats · questionable logic · spelling and grammar police
Joshua brings us this amazing pair of notes from his apartment building in Philly.
The backstory: “A bulk package of cat food (probably 20 or so cans) was delivered and sat in the hallway for about 4 or 5 days. We could see what it was because the sides of the package were cardboard, but the top was clear plastic. (Like what you’d find at Costco). On day 3 or 4 of the cat food being left in the hallway, the plastic had been torn back and a few cans were taken.” The next day, the package was claimed, and this note appeared…
Two days later — luckily, after Joshua snapped a photo — the note disappeared. In its place…
A day later, the response note was torn down, too.
Tags: cats · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · Philadelphia · rebuttals · smiley · stealing · thanks (but not really) · that's illegal
While Jessica was a college student in Boston, she lived in a five-person apartment with one friend and three strangers. Jess says apartment issues were rarely (if ever talked about directly (there was but one “meeting), but were instead handled through a series of “love notes” from Anne, like this one.
Most of the points in this letter, Jessica adds, were directed at one person in particular — her friend, with whom Anne shared a room. And when Anne was told to “remind people to clean” at the meeting, Jess says she and her roommates were simply referring to when and if it began to bother her. Oh, and the building’s rodent problem was a pre-existing condition.
Tags: Boston · cleaning · dishes · garbage · guests · not-so-veiled threats · vermin · water · Your mother doesn't...