Entries Tagged as 'office fridge'
Sigh. Half the people in your department just got pink-slipped, your 401(k) is worth shit, and now, just when you thought things couldn’t get any worse…they’re coming for your muffin, too.
All in the name of shareholder value!
(Leaked by Sayf in Greenwich, Connecticut.)
related: Lean cuisine
extra credit: Morgan Stanley cancels Christmas, jobs [dealbreaker]
Tags: Connecticut · Greenwich · money · not-so-veiled threats · office fridge · rebuttals · stealing · touching
The tenth-floor kitchen at this office has no fewer than ten of these painstakingly laminated, clip-art-covered notes — and our anonymous submitter says this kitchen is only the tip of the iceberg.
“Nearly all of the notes in our office receive the same attention to detail,” our submitter says. “Every time I come to work I have to remind myself that I’m not in a cartoon fairy-tale land of fun.”
related: It takes a “genius” to come up with a potluck theme like this one
Tags: "helpful" advice · blitzkrieg approach · clip art catastrophe · gloriously redundant · microwave · office · office fridge · popcorn
Our anonymous submitter spotted these notes in the shared kitchen of a “professional building” — one our submitter says is full of shrinks. Perhaps one of them could deduce whether “i.e. me” fits the DSM’s criteria for a diagnosis…or whether she’s just having a little trouble with her Latin.
related: eau dear
extra credit: “food odors at work” [chowhound.com]
Tags: casual xenophobia · food · Freudian shit · i.e. or e.g. it's all greek -- or is it latin? -- to me · odor · office fridge · oh snap
Like this phrase, there are a few irritating little pieces of clip art that keep popping up in submissions over and over again. Hovering somewhere near the top of most-wanted list is this pouty little white-gloved dandy.
From the factories of Pittsburgh…
…to the cube-farms of Virginia, this perspiring misanthrope has been spreading his message of intolerance with impunity.
But, once again, it’s a note from a church bathroom (this one spotted by Jess in Boston) that really pushes things to a whole new level of divine didacticism.
Can I get a witness?!
related: clip art crimes
Tags: bathroom · Boston · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · exclamation-point happy!!!! · gloriously redundant · most popular notes of 2008 · neighbors · office fridge · Pittsburgh
Tags: "helpful" advice · food · FYI · Minneapolis/St. Paul · office fridge
Tags: excessive underlining · London · milk · office fridge · stealing · U.K. · Yahoo
After noticing a tell-tale crisping sleeve in the garbage, Charlie in New York spotted this helpful directive on the office fridge.
(Though if you ask Jim Gaffigan, the thief was really doing the guy a favor.)
related: I swear this isn’t some kind of viral marketing campaign
Tags: "helpful" advice · New York · office fridge · stealing · visual aids
Joe in Northern Virginia has amassed a pretty divine collection of office fridge notes over the years, the best of which portend various forms of karmic/economic/physical retribution.
related: It must have been a pretty big bite
Tags: "accidental" "borrowing" · ellipses-crazed · food · karma's a bitch · licking · not-so-veiled threats · office · office fridge · Reston · stealing · Virginia
Nobody likes it when food goes missing from the office fridge, but one V8-drinking facilities staffer in Savannah, Georgia wanted to make her displeasure a bit more official.
Adds our anonymous submitter: “As you can see, the pest control department took appropriate action.”
related: If the TSA was in charge of the office fridge?
Tags: beverages · Georgia · office · office fridge · Savannah · stealing
This just in: starving unborn children aren’t the only casualties of office fridge lunch thievery. As one anonymous New Yorker reports, now the sick and the infirm are being picked off, too!
(Thank you kindly? Best wishes? Hungry on the 12th floor, you kill me.)
Tags: cleaning · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · guilt trip · ital overkill · New York · office fridge · questionable logic · rhetorical question · sarcasm · thanks (but not really)