Entries Tagged as 'Oops?'

Did somebody say “snail mail”?

December 1st, 2010 · 107 Comments

Before her husband left on his first military deployment, Sarah in San Diego sent out an e-mail to the whole family with info about how everyone can stay in touch while he’s away. To avoid any potential in-law drama, she even had her husband read and sign off on the e-mail before sending. What neither Sarah nor her husband took into account? The Uncle Paul factor.

Her husband’s Uncle Paul, Sarah explains, is a mailman/postman/letter carrier — whatever the correct term is. (Based on Uncle Paul’s reply, she says, “I’m clearly not up enough on the intricate etiquette of the U.S. Postal Service to know.”)

Sarah oh Sarah, Greetings and Happy Post Thanksgiving. Congrats.........you have officially made

related: This is why your postal worker is disgruntled

Tags: e-mail · exclamation-point happy!!!! · family · going postal · holiday spirit · Oops?

Feeling of failing

November 21st, 2010 · 116 Comments

Our submitter, a college student in Wisconsin, passes along this “debackle” of an e-mail a girl in her art history class recently sent to all the other students in the class — and, in a particularly gutsy/idiotic move — to the professor, too.

Adds our submitter: “The funny thing is that the class is actually very enjoyable, the instructor has never changed a test date/format, and the lectures are always well organized and engaging. Judging from all the spelling errors, she might want to drop art history and pick up an English class instead.”

Hi. I'm a classmate forced to suffer with you on this painful road of the history of art. I am reaching out to anyone who is struggling to keep up with the changing tests, the lack of pertanant [sic] information, and the hair pulling debackle [sic] of lecture.  I'm looking for people who are up for study groups and that are willing to share the load when figuring out where the hell we're going.  Feel free to contact me if your [sic] interested in hooking up and NEVER TAKING THIS CLASS AGAIN!  I'm willing to work and desprate [sic] not to do this again.  All my info is listed below, texting or e-mail is best.

related: One final critique — put the damned phone away!

Tags: college life · e-mail · Oops? · spelling and grammar police · Wisconsin · your/you're

Hard times with hard water

August 8th, 2010 · 83 Comments

This seems like a reasonable enough request to ask of your housemates…except for the fact that, as Jason explains, “Our water is full of assorted minerals (and who knows what else), and drips from the ceiling above the bathtub all day.”

Please stop urinating in the bathtub. None of us need to deal with that.

So those yellow stains in the tub? Yeah, not urine. Just evidence of a bathtub in need of some serious scrubbing. (And those pink stains on the water cooler? Probably not lipstick.)

But if your shower smells like piss…well, it’s gonna be hard to blame that on hard water.

Dear Pee Bandit,  Sometime the shower smells like urine. Whoever you are, please stop.  Love, the rest of us

related: Who takes a crap in the shower?!

Tags: bathtub · Oops? · piss · shower · signed with love

Exes and Ohs

July 29th, 2010 · 111 Comments

It all started when Erin in Toronto sent her uncle a Christmas card. Actually, scratch that — it all started three years ago, at Erin’s wedding, the last time Erin actually saw her uncle in person.

Before the wedding, Erin explains, “Linda (my uncle’s girlfriend) RSVP’d that she’d attend, and then then didn’t bother to show up, meaning we had to pay for her meal anyway.” (Not that she’s bitter about that or anything!) “Since then,” Erin says, “I assumed they had broken up and have addressed the annual Christmas card to just my uncle and cousin.”

Now, while that might sound a bit hasty (or even, dare I say…passive-aggressive),  in Erin’s defense, the Christmas cards she received were only signed by her uncle and cousin — this year’s included. And yet, in what appears to be a last-minute back-of-the-envelope calculation, “Linda chose this year to remind me that she was still kicking around,” Erin says.

Hi Erin! In case you weren't aware I live here as well (13 years). Thanks! Linda

On the flip side of things, receiving mail addressed to one’s ex can be a disturbing experience as well. I’d say this intercepted message speaks for itself.

Nancy cheated on her husband while he was deployed to Iraq and no longer lives at this address. Return to sender.

related: There are NO pre-paid legal executives (OR FEMALES!) living here!

Tags: Christmas · ex drama · family · going postal · Oops? · Texas · Toronto · weddings and bridezillas

No snitchin’

June 21st, 2010 · 91 Comments

“So, this note was left in my mailbox (along with those of our other neighbors, I assume) back in March,” says our submitter in Connecticut. Although this one starts with out with seems like run-of-the-mill suburban blahblahblah, the second paragraph throws out a hell of a curveball.

Dear Neighbor: A member of the Health Department knocked on my door today to report a complaint of stagnant water in the swimming pool in my backyard. It was reported to them that the pool has been idle for two years and has standing stagnant water in it. Let me assure you that when we decided not to open the pool (to swim in) last summer, we contacted the Health Department and had to go down there and sign for (there is a public record of this) mosquito larvae killer tablets. The pool was treated all spring, summer, and fall last year (2009). Sometime after we closed the pool last fall, we noticed this winter that all of the water had drained out of it. The recent rains have left water in there for now and the pool is being treated once again with the mosquito larvae killer tablets. We hope to have the leak in the pool repaired this summer and have it operational, but until that time it will be treated appropriately. In 30 days, I will request via the Freedom of Information Act who reported this Health Violation to the city without having the courtesy to even inquire of me what the status of the pool is. At that time, I will publish that person's name as it will be a matter of public record. Thank you for your time and concern. Your Neighbor

“To be honest, I’m surprised the notewriter hasn’t taken to the street with a megaphone, demanding that the cowards who called the Health Department show themselves,” our submitter says. No such luck, however. ”My wife and I are dying to know who the snitch was,” he says, “but we’ve been left hanging!”

He adds: “I’ve considered mailing the writer an anonymous note stating that, strictly speaking, leaving notes in our mailboxes without paying postage is a violation of federal law. You know,  just to throw some fuel on the fire.” (I’d say submitting the note to this note is probably good enough.)

related: Thanks for your concern, but you have no idea what you’re talking about.

Tags: Connecticut · MYOB · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · Oops?

Feel free to apologize

May 16th, 2010 · 39 Comments

“I found this posted on every vertical object within a block radius around Adam’s Point in Oakland,” says submitter JasonP. (I particularly enjoy point #4 of the response.)

Just a point of advice - If you're going to vandalize someone's building, don't be stupid enough to put the same logo on your vehicle and park it 4 blocks away 4 days later. Now I have your license plate number. Enjoy speaking with the cops.   1. I DID NOT

Meanwhile, a set of neighbors in Vancouver, B.C. were tussling over a similar case of mistaken identity.

Feel free to apologise

related: I’m not creepy, in fact…I’m quite gay.

extra credit: “But he was dressed like a ‘gang person,’ you guys!”

Tags: "helpful" advice · CAPS LOCK · exclamation-point happy!!!! · graffiti · mistaken identity · neighbors · noise · Oakland · Oops? · rebuttals · Vancouver · vandalism

Because a true friend would never turn down an opportunity to play stupid games and buy you expensive crap

April 11th, 2010 · 122 Comments

…especially when the invitation is extended via your Facebook wall to everyone you know.

So you find out who your true friends are when you have a baby shower...I guess I will look at this as a blessing in disguise, because now I know that true friends aren't flakes, and flakes are not your friends!

so I had my baby shower last weekend and I have to say Im fairly disapointed [sic] in all the people that not only didnt show up but didnt even call so thanks everyone!!!!!!

thanks to all my punk ass friends for not coming to my kids b-day party... if you didn't want to go why in the hell did you say you would in the first place?? assholes

Or (oopsies!) almost everyone you know.

I would like to thank our friends for coming to M-'s very special first birthday party...OH WAIT....none of you showed up! :( I would like to thank Angel (I can always count on you) and Cathy and our course our families for making it great! Luv u!

related: Your Facebook friends…just not that into you.

extra credit: STFU, Parents

Tags: cry me a freaking river · frenemies · it's my party · kids · martyr complex · Moms & Dads · Oops? · preggers

Princess Marmalade has been notified

March 24th, 2010 · 70 Comments

“Recently our neighbour falsely accused us of sending him a (passive?) aggressive letter,” says Joe in the U.K. “He was not a happy bunny.” Before an all-out note war commenced, however, the real culprit was apparently identified. Joe received this sincere note of apology the next day.

HELLO!! SORRY ABOUT YESTERDAY I'VE FOUND OUT WHO PUT THE NOTE THROUGH MY DOOR IT WAS THE IDIOT WHO LIVES AT [redacted] WHO HAS IS HOUSE UP FOR SALE I WOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYONE'S CAR AND HE CAN PARK ANYWHERE HE AS NO CONSIDERATION FOR ANYONE ELSE HOWEVER PLEASE TELL YOUR CAT NOT TO SHIT ON MY FRONT GARDEN

Adds Joe: “We’re not really sure what the car thing is about — probably a reference to the original note we didn’t send!”

related: (Don’t Fear) The Creeper

Tags: car · cats · neighbors · non-apology apology · Oops? · shit · U.K.

…and “B” for Busted

January 6th, 2010 · 68 Comments

Pitchfork gave this performance by Patrick (“guy in a band”) and A (“friend of guy in band”) — a 7.2. Be sure to read from the bottom up!

...and

related: perfect for each other

Tags: Facebook · Oops?

(Don’t Fear) The Creeper

January 3rd, 2010 · 170 Comments

I live in an apartment complex where most people know each other and are generally on good terms,” says Jin in California…or so he thought. As it turns out, there’s a pool of bold-underlined-all-caps-highlighted frustration simmering (oh-so-hilariously) just below the surface.

Hey you! Yes YOU! (The Peeping Tom): If I EVER catch you looking through my window again I swear on everything I hold dear that my cooter will be the last thing your pervy eyes will ever see again.

To the person who saw me peeping at you

related: Be more private with yourself

Tags: bold underlined italics · California · CAPS LOCK · double-entendre alert · high on highlighter · holiday spirit · mistaken identity · most popular notes of 2010 · neighbors · non-apology apology · not-so-veiled threats · Oops? · rebuttals · sad face · sex sex sex