PassiveAggressiveNotes.com » opening/closing

Bad dog! Stop that! Right now!

Kerry — Fri, 01 Apr 2011 01:16:40 +0000

When I read this landlord’s note…

…this is roughly the image that came to mind:

Anyone else?

Please take me at my word that I’ve been working out lately

Kerry — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 02:07:23 +0000

Our anonymous submitter didn’t catch the original note about “slaming [sic] the door,” but you can get a pretty good idea of what it said based on the carefully worded response from the recipient, John (who, like Dustin, simply isn’t aware of his own strength at times).

Meanwhile, this note, as seen by Felix in Atlanta, was clearly left by a neighbor without a law degree.

(I’m guessing a dog; cats are way more passive-aggressive.)

related: Door-slamming sign slam

>>Crushing

Kerry — Fri, 08 Oct 2010 03:05:48 +0000

Paul has lived in his apartment in Berlin for 15 months, but this note is the first time he’s heard a single complaint about his door. Especially annoying, Paul says, is the fact that it’s anonymous, “even though it could possibly have been written by only one of two people,” and that it’s written in English, “which most expats would consider an insult.”

Just another example of how — no matter smiley faces you sprinkle throughout — your oh-so-courteous anonymous note is probably just going to leave everyone more “pi**ed off.”

>Closing<< is usually the wrong term to describe this. >>Crushing<< is mostly the better term. :-( If your door is broken , let it repair from our beloved [redacted] or Repair it yourself or Use your key to close it in a way, not bothering your neighbors. ....and kindly give this info your visitors too ;-) Greetz & Peace" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4139/4767057071_7135a658f2.jpg" alt="Dear Neighbours, some people livin here , are really pi**ed about the way, you close your door, when coming/leaving. >>Closing<< is usually the wrong term to describe this. >>Crushing<< is mostly the better term. If your door is broken , let it repair from our beloved [redacted] or Repair it yourself or Use your key to close it in a way, not bothering your neighbors. ....and kindly give this info your visitors too ;-) Greetz & Peace" width="500" height="375" />

related: Wie bitte(r)?

extra credit: “Greetz” [urbandictionary.com]

Ain’t that the gospel truth?

Kerry — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 02:12:34 +0000

Chris says this note was slipped under his apartment door by one of his “typically passive-aggressive Seattle neighbors.” And no, he adds, he hadn’t noticed. Perhaps because the door was lacking in aggressively punctuated parenthetical statements!! (Homeowners dues??)

Personally, I am just luuurving the nice little call-and-response rhythm this note has got goin’ on. I eagerly await the OutKast “Rape Burgle Murder” remix!(!!)

related: Everyone: shut it

Everyone: shut it.

Kerry — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 13:44:53 +0000

“The screen door to our block of flats is broken,” says our anonymous submitter in Australia, “which has provoked some rather unique responses from my fellow residents.”

related: But who’s counting?

But who’s counting?

Kerry — Sun, 16 Mar 2008 12:19:16 +0000

Writes an anonymous New Yorker: “Our neighbors hate us because we are the youngest in the building. Thus, any malfunction that occurs in the building results in notes directed towards us. And yes, this note was a follow-up to another note (seen at left) also directed at us.”

Happy St. Patrick’s Day, kids!

related: infinite note project

The sincerest form of passive-aggression

kerry — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 19:18:07 +0000

Laura in Boston says one of the restrooms at her school is a real note bonanza. The inside of the stall features no fewer than four individual notes about proper flushing etiquette, and immediately outside the restroom are two (slightly contradictory notes) about proper door opening/closing procedure.

But what’s most interesting? How a couple of those notes look awfully familiar...

Office anthropomorphism

kerry — Sat, 29 Dec 2007 19:30:14 +0000

Many offices, it seems, are a regular Disneyland of what only appear to be inanimate objects. The evidence?

From Frank in San Francisco, a sentient sponge:

From Amy in Annapolis, Maryland, a talking toilet:

From Ben in San Antonio, Texas, a talking door:

And then there’s my favorite – from an anonymous submitter in Washington, D.C. – a talking (and walking) microwave:

(Most baffling…where on earth did that clip art come from?)

related: I guess that’s why

You gotta keep ’em separated

Kerry — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 12:45:07 +0000

This delightful note comes to us from the wilds of suburban Orange County, California. “There is a door at my school (a private college) that is constantly propped open,” explains Amy, a grad student. “Up until yesterday, the note on the door said, ‘Please close door.’ I have NO idea about the microwave burning, or what the note writer has against skateboarders.”

Adds Amy: “How does one burn a microwave, anyway? Maybe they put one microwave inside of another microwave?”

Two points for chutzpah, but zero for originality

Kerry — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 01:43:16 +0000

Writes our anonymous submitter in Corte Madera, California: “We have a lot of passive-aggressive notes up around the office, and most of them are addressed to the entire office staff in common areas. You can imagine my surprise when after eating lunch and going out for a smoke break with some coworkers today, we came back to find a bit of passive-aggressiveness on our lunch table — not 15 minutes after we had left it. Grrrrr.”

More choice guilt-trips from this office — including yet another “your mother doesn’t work here” note, follow.

Vaguely hostile hostel

Kerry — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 02:07:15 +0000

Frequent troublemaker Team Cassandra sends us a dispatch from her trip to old Montreal. The charmant hostel she stayed in had 32 hostelers, two bathrooms, one kitchen, lots of awkward signage, and an overall vibe of, “I’ve said this 10, 000 times and I’m not saying it again.”

is that a question or a command!?!?

Kerry — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 18:42:53 +0000

found on the company dishwasher by pete m.at the bottom: “if you would like a lesson in telling the difference between the machine being on or not, please see reception.” (now that’s a power point presentation i’d love to see.)