Shannon in New York saw this note posted on the fence of the nearby community garden while she and her roommate were taking her dog for a walk for. The thought of a little old lady glued to her binoculars at 4 in the morning, this had them laughing for many prepositional phrases of time.
related: the right to bear fruit
Tags: CAPS LOCK · Clearly a non-native English speaker · excessive underlining · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · New York · spelling and grammar police · stealing · WTF?
Amy spotted this attached to a mailbox in Monroe, North Carolina. Writes amy: “I have no idea which flower it was (there were many that were still left on the porch), but I was impressed by the effort the victim took with this note — it was written on poster board and left up for quite a few days.”
(And the posterboard…was a birthday gift…purchased with her own money!!!)
related: “no” questions asked
Tags: birthday · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · guilt trip · martyr complex · Moms & Dads · North Carolina · sad face · stealing
Both of these signs would have gotten their points across perfectly well in just a few words…but the true passive-aggressive always knows how to convey his or her true meaning with just one more choice phrase.
Exhibit a) from Paula in Logan, Utah:
Exhibit b) spotted by my pal Brooke in Savannah, Georgia:
related: That means you, Edith
Tags: flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · lOWERCASE l · old folks · pleasantries as afterthought · Savannah · Utah
Three U.S. cities where nature-lovers might want to keep their hands to themselves:
1. Austin, Texas
2. Macon, Georgia
![To the Fucktard who stole my watermellon [sic]: It was not even RIPE yet. But I'm sure you didn't notice when you were high on crack. Leave my fucking plants alone! —Proud owner of a .45 and a 38 special](http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3247/2747836840_d49a3453d3.jpg "To the Fucktard who stole my watermellon [sic]: It was not even RIPE yet. But I'm sure you didn't notice when you were high on crack. Leave my fucking plants alone! —Proud owner of a .45 and a 38 special")
3. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
(Thanks to Don in Austin, Elizabeth in Macon, and Jasmine in Pittsburgh for risking the wrath of some devoted gardening/second amendment enthusiasts to document these warnings.)
related: No “questions” asked
Tags: Austin · blame it on the crackhead · CAPS LOCK · exclamation-point happy!!!! · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · Georgia · Macon · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · Pittsburgh · spelling and grammar police · stealing
“Working in a university library, you get used to a lot of ‘quirky’ personalities,” says our anonymous submitter in Manhattan, Kansas. “So far, this is the only one that has decided to put pathology to paper.”
Tags: CAPS LOCK · college life · exclamation-point happy!!!! · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · Kansas · nonsensical spacing · touching
I love how the notewriter quickly abandons the initial pretense here, then completely throws in the towel with the last line.
Thanks to Adam in San Francisco for spotting this masterpiece!
Tags: "accidental" "borrowing" · CAPS LOCK · confusion??? · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · sad face · San Francisco · stealing
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