Explains our submitter in Maryland: “Housemate is pregnant. She doesn’t like it when we leave the AC on.” (Ya think?)
Entries Tagged as 'preggers'
July 15th, 2013 · 76 Comments
October 23rd, 2012 · 108 Comments
If the consequences of eating a Hot Pocket aren’t enough to deter you from buying them, you should know that storing them in your freezer at work or school is still a risky proposition. (And no, Snoop won’t be there to back you up.)
Exhibit a) Spotted by Anna in Oakland, California:
Exhibit b) Spotted by Diana in Green Bay, Wisconsin:
Exhibit c) Spotted by David in Austin, Texas:
Exhibit d) Spotted by Charlie in New York:
Exhibit e) Spotted by Angie in Atlanta, with apologies for the blurriness:
(Delicious, you say? Michelle? Is that you?) And lastly…
Exhibit f) From Princeton, New Jersey:
September 8th, 2011 · 117 Comments
Writes Amber in Minnesota: “My friend works in accounting for a local restaurant chain, and every once in awhile she has to go through credit card receipts if something isn’t adding up correctly. She’s found some pretty interesting gems, but this one takes the cake.”
[Adds the Not-Pregnant Notewriter: THANKS FOR THE 'TAKES THE CAKE' COMMENT, AMBER. REALLY.]
February 18th, 2011 · 69 Comments
I’ll admit it: I had to read this note and the accompanying explanation about three times before I grasped that “hair baby” was supposed to refer to the leftover strands that someone in Tricia’s dorm keeps leaving in the shower drain.
But speaking of babies…as Massimo noticed, this Boston-area Walgreens is apparently hoping to capitalize on your drunken New Years/Valentine’s Day sexual escapades. (Or else they’re just really, really curious?????)
related: Please clean ALL your feathers.
extra credit: The incredible hair baby of Manchester [Dailymail.co.uk]
May 20th, 2010 · 96 Comments
So, these two crazy kids (both of whom still live with their parents, according to our submitter), had a lil’ accident. A really exciting one! So exciting they decided the best way to share the news was en masse, via Facebook status update! So be excited for them, dammit!!!
related: Children are such a blessing.
May 11th, 2010 · 105 Comments
Our Bay-Area submitter returned from lunch one day to find this note from an anonymous concerned coworker.
“I’ll admit that I’ve gained about 15 pounds recently,” she says. However, “At 4’11 and normally around 95 pounds, even with the extra 15 I’m still within an acceptable weight range for my height.” But the real kicker, says our submitter?
“I’m also 5 months pregnant. I just haven’t made a big deal about it by talking incessantly about it or demanding special treatment like I’m God’s gift to the world just because I got myself knocked up.”
(So, uh, I think that’s a no, she won’t be seeing you there.)
Because a true friend would never turn down an opportunity to play stupid games and buy you expensive crap
April 11th, 2010 · 122 Comments
…especially when the invitation is extended via your Facebook wall to everyone you know.
Or (oopsies!) almost everyone you know.
extra credit: STFU, Parents
March 7th, 2010 · 72 Comments
Facebook: always there to remind you of all the fun you’re not having.
related: Socializing (you’re doing it wrong)
June 26th, 2009 · 90 Comments
This all-staff e-mail is like a fetus-sized version of one of my favorite self-righteous masterpieces. (How this one got buried in my inbox for so long, I have no idea.)
It comes to us courtesy of Jennifer in Chapel Hill, N.C., who notes: “In this instance, ‘local users,’ is everyone in our corporate HQ — including the president, vice presidents, directors, legal counsel, etc., who don’t typically utilize the refrigerator in the staff break room.”
related: It must have been a pretty big bite
extra credit: STFU, Parents
July 8th, 2008 · 214 Comments
The most irritating part of finding this note propped on her keyboard, says Jackie in Philly, is that she wasn’t the person who requested dark chocolate in the office vending machine. “In fact, I can’t stand the stuff!” (In that case…hello, baby shower gift?)
related: Bun — er, — pizza in the oven