this (long-overdue) all-staff e-mail is like a fetus-sized version of one of my favorite self-righteous masterpieces. (how this one got buried in my inbox for so long, i have no idea.)
it comes to us courtesy of jennifer in chapel hill, n.c., who notes: “in this instance, ‘local users,’ is everyone in our corporate hq — [...]
Entries Tagged as 'preggers'
and those cheetos were my baby’s yellow dye #6
June 26th, 2009 · 90 Comments
Tags: all-staff e-mail · moms & dads · north carolina · office · preggers · stealing
the womb that would birth a thousand excuses
July 8th, 2008 · 213 Comments
the most irritating part of finding this note propped on her keyboard, says jackie in philly, is that she wasn’t the person who requested dark chocolate in the office vending machine. “in fact, i can’t stand the stuff!” (in that case…hello, shower gift?)
related: bun — er, — pizza in the oven
Tags: office · philadelphia · preggers · smiley
maybe it’s time for sally struthers to get involved
May 14th, 2008 · 141 Comments
with finals and thesis deadlines coming up, stress levels among grad students at uc-berkeley have been running high (which means attention to the finer points of, say, apostrophe use, are running low). and now there’s a lunch thief on the loose!
sadly, says our submitter, the note’s multi-pronged approach (guilt, threats, helpful advice) seems to [...]
Tags: apostrophe abuse · berkeley · california · food · fridge · kitchen · preggers · stealing · the homeless · university · warning
i’m pregnant…what’s your excuse?
March 23rd, 2008 · 100 Comments
amanda in fairhaven, mass. recently took her sister-in-law in for an ultrasound appointment, and she was a little frightened by this sign. (it was posted in three places inside and outside the restroom.)
related: bun — er, pizza in the oven
Tags: bathroom · exclamation-point happy! · massachusetts · piss · preggers
bun — er, pizza — in the oven
February 29th, 2008 · 126 Comments
zakir in montreal came home one night to find his roommate tristan ferociously scribbling this note for his other roommate, vincent. apparently, tristan was baking cookies on saturday night (aww) and when he turned on the stove, the entire apartment filled with smoke from the charred cardboard from vince’s frozen pizza. says zakir: “vincent’s [...]
Tags: double-entendre alert · heart · montreal · oven · pizza · preggers · smiley · south carolina · spelling and grammar police
it must have been a pretty big bite
June 29th, 2007 · 145 Comments
an amazing one from brian in cleveland:
Tags: CAPS LOCK · cheese · cleveland · exclamation-point happy! · moms & dads · more aggressive than passive · office · office fridge · ohio · pleasantries as afterthought · preggers · questionable logic · spelling and grammar police · stealing

