Courtney’s friend Tom found this note — from our newest contender for douchecanoe of the year) — on the windshield of his Toyota FJ Cruiser.
Entries Tagged as 'questionable logic'
September 9th, 2013 · 69 Comments
May 14th, 2013 · 52 Comments
Our submitter has been couchsurfing his way through the living rooms of strangers across the country, and recently made a stop in Portland, Oregon. One morning, after leaving his dirty clothes in a pile near the rest of his stuff, he returned later to find…a surprise.
Adds our submitter: “Everyone in Portland seems to do things like this. All. The. Time.”
related: Put a bird on it!
September 26th, 2011 · 41 Comments
Q. When is a door not a door?
A. If you ask a 10-year-old with a joke book: “When it’s ajar.” Otherwise…whenever somebody says so.
Exhibit a) from Trent in Melbourne, Australia:
Exhibit b) from Michael in North Carolina:
Exhibit c) from Laura in Greenville, South Carolina:
Exhibit d) from Shannon in Albany, New York:
Exhibit e) from Summer in Austin, Texas:
And lastly, a straight-up Magritte shout-out:
August 31st, 2011 · 85 Comments
Well, lookie here: this office in Florida has a “Jeff” of their own!
July 24th, 2011 · 49 Comments
Writes Stacey in Massachusetts: “The church around the corner from my house is famous for the little rants on their sign, but this one definitely takes the cake.” Obviously, texting while driving isn’t cool, but as Stacey put it: “For a church, it just seems a bit…hostile.”
Meanwhile, I just opened up the August issue of Texas Monthly to see this slightly more gently worded version…
related: Sincerely, God
extra credit: Church sign generator
May 9th, 2011 · 84 Comments
Note: the following message has explicitly NOT been approved by Jack Donaghy. (Do not be fooled by that GE logo at the bottom of the page.)
Remarkably enough, our submitter, Dan in Milwaukee, says the following message was NOT penned by a satirical television writer, but rather by an anonymous member of the office Green Police. (The two pennies — payment for 2011′s extra energy usage — were then added later by an anonymous member of the office Bullshit Police.)
This is, of course, simply a new strategy in the ongoing war being waged in kitchenettes across the world by the United League of Office Workers Who Have Nothing Better to Complain About.
April 18th, 2011 · 78 Comments
“The crayon note showed up about two months before the response,” says Monica at Goucher College, “but both have been a source of great entertainment.”
related: Comrades, take notice!
extra credit: A lesson from Barney! **********
March 17th, 2011 · 75 Comments
Gloria in Pennsylvania spotted this warning — sort of a New Testament twist on the old “lamb’s blood on the doorpost” trick — posted on a neighbor’s apartment door.
Now, maybe it’s because I’m a godless heathen, but if I ever took up a life of crime, I think I might find this sign from a West Virginia convenience store (as photographed by Matt in Brooklyn) just a bit more convincing.
February 9th, 2011 · 67 Comments
Our submitter in Malaysia called this auto-reply from her coworker “a great way to ensure consistent passive-aggressiveness in the workplace, even when you’re busy holidaying.” (As always, just click the image to enlarge.)
It reminded me of these “instructional instructions” from the manual that James in the U.K. received with his DVD player.
related: Gee, that’ll show ‘em
January 26th, 2011 · 133 Comments
After a night of heavy drinking, Dani in Baltimore woke up with a killer hangover that turned positively murderous when she noticed that her bottle of Gatorade — which she’d been saving in anticipation of her post-hangover re-hydration needs — was missing from the fridge.
Assuming her husband must have taken it, Dani quickly dashed off this exclamation-point-heavy tirade (which, of course, is “passive” only in the sense that she chose to sit down at the keyboard instead of going straight for the butcher knife).
A few hours later, however, says Dani, “I remembered that I had actually drunkenly finished the bottle of Gatorade the night before, in an attempt to avoid said hangover. Oops!”
I’m hoping this little “oops” was a come-to-Jesus moment for Dani that showed her the error of note-writing ways, but if not…well, Dani’s husband: consider yourself warned. Because seriously, this is America, not another planet!
related: You are on Uncle Paul’s list!