PassiveAggressiveNotes.com » recycling http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com funny (if not necessarily "passive-aggressive") notes from pissed-off people Wed, 08 Feb 2012 19:51:33 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Your punishment for forgetting your reusable grocery bags http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2012/01/18/excuse-me-im-recycled/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2012/01/18/excuse-me-im-recycled/#comments Thu, 19 Jan 2012 03:29:23 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=20859 Writes Kiki in Melbourne: “Have you ever seen a sack act so bitchy and sanctimonious all at once? I can’t believe a plastic bag’s attitude actually started to piss me off!”

Well, Kiki, it could be worse.

related: …and F the Polar Bear!
extra credit: I (don’t) use plastic bags.

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2012/01/18/excuse-me-im-recycled/feed/ 46 …and F the Polar Bear! http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/12/29/f-the-polar-bear/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/12/29/f-the-polar-bear/#comments Thu, 29 Dec 2011 23:48:39 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=20035 Jess in St. Louis says this dumpster “is definitely a manifestation of the microcosm of American value clashes that is my block.” Adds Jess: “Hopefully we can all survive the cardboard waste of Christmas in one piece.”

Whoever threw away all that cardboard. Do it again and I'll fill your yard with it. Don't be an Asshole. Recycle. [Response] QUIT Being a Nanny-State, Progressive, Liberal, ASS and try to FORCE me to recycle if I don't want to. FU & F the Polar Bear! And if I catch you in my yard, realize, I support the 2nd Ammendmant [sic]. this was written by someone who choses to recycle.

Whoever threw away all that cardboard. Do it again and I'll fill your yard with it. Don't be an Asshole. Recycle.

QUIT Being a Nanny-State, Progressive, Liberal, ASS and try to FORCE me to recycle if I don't want to. FU & F the Polar Bear! And if I catch you in my yard, realize, I support the 2nd Ammendmant [sic]. this was written by someone who choses to recycle.

related: The right to bear fruit

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/12/29/f-the-polar-bear/feed/ 56 Sure, she’s dumb as a box of hair, but… http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/12/04/hair-recycling/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/12/04/hair-recycling/#comments Mon, 05 Dec 2011 02:10:06 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=19969 Apparently Meaghan’s roommates weren’t happy with how she disposed of her bang trimmings in the recycling bin. But c’mon, at least she didn’t leave em in the sink or the shower drain, right? Or…maybe she was confused about how the whole “locks of love” thing works? Or…aww, screw it. Can’t you bitches all just get along?

Hey bitch (Meaghan)! Hair is not recyclable! (I hope your new haircut looks really stupid!) -N & B

related: Dear mother of hair baby…

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/12/04/hair-recycling/feed/ 49 Perhaps your boss is due for a little chat with HR? http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/28/please-kill-yourself-now/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/28/please-kill-yourself-now/#comments Wed, 28 Sep 2011 20:44:36 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=19466 The sign to the left was posted by the boss at an office in Oneonta, New York. (Adds our submitter: “He claims the spelling was autocorrected by Word.”)

Without even getting into the finer points of what might constitute a “hostile work environment,” I think it’s safe to say that encouraging your employees to commit suicide isn’t the best management technique.

IF YOU ARE NOT INTELLEGENT [sic] ENOUGH TO RINSE OUT THE EMPTIES, PLEASE KILL YOURSELF NOW. [response:] What about not being able to spell

(Of course, some managers might disagree.)

You don't call retarded people retards. You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded.

related: Signs you might be stuck in a soul-sucking job

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/28/please-kill-yourself-now/feed/ 31 So close, and yet… http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/01/so-close-and-yet/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/01/so-close-and-yet/#comments Fri, 02 Sep 2011 00:40:29 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=19305 Darin in Chicago came across the note on the side of his neighbor’s garage just as he was throwing his own dog’s crap in the trash can. (This is kinda like getting out the new roll of TP, but then leaving it on the side of the sink to get wet instead of just putting it on the dispenser…except, worse.)

You pick up the dog crap, but insist on leaving it next to the garbage can. I don't understand.

I don’t really understand the logic here either, but perhaps this particular dog owner is still dealing with the scars from dealing with neighbors like this one, from Ottawa:

OLD LADY If I Catch You In The Act Of Putting Your Dogs Crap In Our Cans. I Will Cut Off Your Head And Bolt It To The Hood Of My Car

related: This is not a trash can

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/01/so-close-and-yet/feed/ 99 The cycle of (not) recycling http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/29/the-cycle-of-not-recycling/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/29/the-cycle-of-not-recycling/#comments Sun, 29 Aug 2010 23:47:53 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=16404 These notes — the first from on office in California, the second from an office in Arkansas — both seem like they’re following the same not-quite-finished flowchart for acceptable office paper usage.

Before you take a sticky... Could this be done in Notepad?? (or Text Edit) If not, recycle when you're done!

A FULL PAGE FOR THIS?? HEAR OF

Really, you’re in for a scolding no matter what. And as our submitter Hannah noticed — in this bizarre exchange from the copy room at a school in Spartanburg, South Carolina — contrition only seems to further incense the office Paper Nazis.

I am sorry for wasting this paper. It's people like you that should be struck from the earth!!!

related: Nothing fosters community like shared networked printers!

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/29/the-cycle-of-not-recycling/feed/ 49 What do God, recycling, and ultramarathons have in common? http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/09/what-do-god-recycling-and-ultramarathons-have-in-common/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/09/what-do-god-recycling-and-ultramarathons-have-in-common/#comments Tue, 10 Aug 2010 04:44:05 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=16301 Uh, you got me. The employees at the Arizona Blockbuster store where the manager posted this sign were similarly stumped. Writes our submitter: “I’m all for recycling, but I have to wonder who’s forcing her to run a 100k marathon…not to mention what that has to do with recycling paper.”

Nothing with personal information on it! Everything else! I have to run 100k marathon, you bitches can recycle. It's God's Way. :)

related: Al Gore knows

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/09/what-do-god-recycling-and-ultramarathons-have-in-common/feed/ 62 Thinking outside the box http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/07/07/thinking-outside-the-box/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/07/07/thinking-outside-the-box/#comments Thu, 08 Jul 2010 03:20:37 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=15832 “I have lived in my crappy building for over two years,” says our submitter from New York’s East Village. “It provides great entertainment, as we get a new set of notes built up on the wall every few months about issues such as people stealing Internet or the building smelling like cat pee. Then someone tears them down and we start over. (Though the building does usually smell of cat pee.)”

In the latest installment of note wars, the opening strike was launched by (she thinks) the building super.

Please do not put cardboard Boxes in Front of Building by Garbage. Leave in Hallway Lobby + Super will dispose properly.

Then some other anonymous apartment dweller threw in his or hew own (slightly flashier) take on the matter.

PLEASE REMOVE THIS CARD BOARD RECYCLING IS OUTSIDE. THIS NOT A DOOR-MAN BLDG.

And lastly…

These signs contradict one another. If we can't put the boxes outside and we can't put them in the hallway, where, may I ask, are we to put them? Thank you.

UPDATE: The box weighs in.

And as for that whole “New Yorkers are jerks” stereotype? This cardboard breakdown — spotted by Dianna in Santa Barbara, California — shows that when it comes to condescending rants, East Coasters don’t have a monopoly on rudeness.

For the person who placed this discard in the trash area! Everyone or rather most people sharing this facility are aware at the ELEMENTARY level (as per the sign on the gate) that YOU break the cardboard down and place it in the recycle container. CONCLUSION: People like you will have a visceral reaction as usual and neglect your personal responsibility. You are predictable. Trash personnel and recycle pick up people are not your lackys [sic] nor are your neighbors.

related: Stick this down your garbage chute

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/07/07/thinking-outside-the-box/feed/ 86 Are you proud to be an American? http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/07/04/are-you-proud-to-be-an-american/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/07/04/are-you-proud-to-be-an-american/#comments Sat, 04 Jul 2009 20:44:23 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=11139 Our anonymous submitter lives in a university flat in the U.K. with four other guys. “Three of us (myself, an American, and a Brit) always take out the garbage and recycling when it’s our turn, but the two other international students seem to think it’s somehow beneath them. There must have been some unpleasantness while i was away for Easter break, because I came home to find this note stuck to the kitchen door, courtesy of my American flatmate.”

Adds our submitter: “I particularly like his choice of symbols to emphasize America as a ruling power: the stars and stripes, a cheeseburger, and Superman.” (And then, of course, there’s the note’s tone —  remarkably in line with American foreign policy!)

are you proud to be an american?

Happy 4th of July, everyone!

related: just doing their part to uphold the reputation of americans abroad

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/07/04/are-you-proud-to-be-an-american/feed/ 206 Tilt your head upwards. http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/01/04/tilt-your-head-upwards/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/01/04/tilt-your-head-upwards/#comments Sun, 04 Jan 2009 17:20:20 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=10240 Josh from Annapolis, Maryland says the first and last note in this exchange were apparently written by Stephen, a college student at a school “known for it’s obtusely intellectual, chronically spacey student body.”

The notes were gone within a few days, but Josh says the situation hasn’t exactly improved. In the meantime, he says, “I’m kinda worried for my own safety. I recently saw this kid chopping firewood in the backyard, so he definitely has an ax.”

Stop using a typewriter on looseleaf. It makes you look like a pretentious asshole. -a concerned citizen
related: passive-aggressive mad libs

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/01/04/tilt-your-head-upwards/feed/ 78 The return of Thx Sandra http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/10/20/thx-sandra-returns/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/10/20/thx-sandra-returns/#comments Mon, 20 Oct 2008 19:07:12 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=9823 Casey in Human Resources may have moved on, but not to worry — Thx Sandra is here to solve our global climate crysis!

Hello Ladies, This is your friend the thermostat. He likes to be at about 70 degrees in the winter and summer. If you are warm please look behind you and you will see a window. If you open that window fresh air will come in and cool you off. If you are cold you can use a space heater for $3 per week please see Casey in Human Resources if you need to sign up to rent one. Please be aware that our planet is in crysis [sic] and we need to take measures to reduce the trash we throw away and the energy we use (which includes the ceiling fan in Accounting!!!!!) and the recycle bins in the break room. I am sick of being the only conciensios [sic] person here. Thx, Sandra

related: It takes a “genius”

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/10/20/thx-sandra-returns/feed/ 149 Two points for chutzpah, but zero for originality http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/09/11/2-points-for-chutzpah-but-zero-for-originality/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/09/11/2-points-for-chutzpah-but-zero-for-originality/#comments Wed, 12 Sep 2007 01:43:16 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/09/11/2-points-for-chutzpah-but-zero-for-originality/ Writes our anonymous submitter in Corte Madera, California: “We have a lot of passive-aggressive notes up around the office, and most of them are addressed to the entire office staff in common areas. You can imagine my surprise when after eating lunch and going out for a smoke break with some coworkers today, we came back to find a bit of passive-aggressiveness on our lunch table — not 15 minutes after we had left it. Grrrrr.”

Clean up after your eat. (Wipe the food off the table and put the chairs back where they belong.) Just like the kitchen, Your mother doesn't work here either.

More choice guilt-trips from this office — including yet another “your mother doesn’t work here” note, follow.

This is a trashcan. It is not a recycling bin. If you turn around, you will find the recycling bin sandwiched between the fridge and the coffee pot. There is really no excuse not to recycle with it's so accessible. You're keeping waste out of landfills and taking a small step to help save the environment.

Note to self: If it's too hard for you to close these doors, maybe you shouldn't be opening them. (Ooo, sassy!)

Wash your dishes & silverware please, your mom doesn't work here

related: Your mother doesn’t work here (or here, or here, or here)

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