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Entries Tagged as 'restaurant'

It’s like an entire episode of Seinfeld on one door

May 15th, 2011 · 61 Comments

From the NON-public restroom inside a deli in Bishop, California:

Wow! This place is awesome! The food is great! That is what you should be saying if you bought something. But instead you're starting to feel guilty about free loading on our rest room. Maybe the

related: “If it wasn’t for the toilet, there would be no books.”

Tags: "customer service" · bathroom · California · etiquette · guilt trip · restaurant

No Bowl Movements Allowed

April 25th, 2011 · 34 Comments

From Jake in Richmond…another one for the “WTF?” files.

Please Do NOT Attempt To Move The Toilet! Thanks, Management.

related: All MALES using this toilet must sit.

Tags: now that's management · restaurant · Richmond · toilet · WTF?

The Year of the Rabbit is off to a lucky start!

February 10th, 2011 · 37 Comments

…at least that’s the spin the managers of this Atlanta restaurant are going with.

Great news! Terminated one server today! More shifts for others, keep up the good work!  Len & Lili

(Thanks to Nicole and her friend Sam for submitting.)

related: Recession incentive plan

Tags: Atlanta · fired · now that's management · restaurant

The restaurant patrons from hell

January 18th, 2011 · 344 Comments

It was a the peak of the lunchtime rush, explains our submitter, a waitress at a busy Chili’s restaurant, and these customers made it clear early on that they weren’t happy with their meal. As you can see from the check, she says, “My manager already comped $18 dollars worth of food that they complained about” — not to mention that when the entrees were remade (for free), the customers ate every last bit — and enjoyed a free dessert as well.

“Apparently, that wasn’t enough, however,” our submitter says. At the end of the meal, “they were still charged for the appetizers they ordered (which they devoured and didn’t complain about),” but somehow they still felt morally superior enough to dine and dash. Adds our waitress: “Tipping may be optional, but walking out on your bill is still theft.”

Absolutely Horrible Service !! Therefore we are only paying half.

Meanwhile, this customer’s approach (as submitted by Thomas in Palo Alto), is just bad form. Homophone fail!

No tip cuz your a BITCH

related: A friendly tip from your waitress

Tags: restaurant · that's illegal · tipping

The Mad Hatter’s Tea Party Rules

December 5th, 2010 · 44 Comments

Our submitter spotted this amazing stream-of-consciousness manifesto inside a small tea shop in Hertfordshire, U.K. “I especially like the lack of punctuation, constantly shifting tone, and preachy generalizations,” she says. “Apparently it’s not enough to simply request that customers wipe their feet or use a trash can — it’s necessary to subject them to a generational guilt trip as well.”

No Muddy Boots - Switch off mobile phones - Keep young Children Seated  What ever next!!!  It is worth reminding ourselves why it is we feel compelled to introduce restrictions and notices of any sort on our customers.  We can assure you that we would rather not!!!  The problem seems to be that we as a society we appear to have less respect for each other than in previous generations.  For example should it really be necessary to have a rule banning people from walking through the tearoom in muddy boots or to request mobile phone be switched off or to have a notice for the Ladies Loo -  Apparently so............  Ladies, PLEASE Use the Sanitary Disposal Bags for relevant items And place in the green bin that has been provided for this sole purpose  DO NOT Flush the disposable bag or any other item that has not gone through your system down our Old and very sensitive system!!!  (Its just not nice - the exception being the loo paper)  Perhaps we should simply have a customer code of conduct that reminds every one to consider others at all times

related: That must be some damn good coffee…

Tags: "customer service" · ellipses-crazed · exclamation-point happy!!!! · kids today · now that's management · restaurant · U.K.

That must be some damn good coffee…

October 5th, 2010 · 143 Comments

“I was walking by a local café and this two-page, handwritten rant stopped me in my tracks,” says our submitter in Montreal. “I was so disturbed I went home and returned immediately with my camera, just in case the owner suddenly got sane (or had some sense talked into him) and decided to take it down. This is someone who should clearly not be dealing with the public.”

Rule 3 (c): Once the transaction is complete and the owner has given you an opening you may engage in social chit-chat.

Rule 3(b) Remember, first things first you are here to buy coffee.

Rule 3 (c): Once the transaction is complete and the owner has given you an opening you may engage in social chit-chat.

related: The Sushi Nazi

Tags: "customer service" · Montreal · most popular notes of 2010 · now that's management · restaurant

A clue that your whole “half-caf, extra hot, non-fat dressing-on-the-side” thing might be a bit much

September 23rd, 2010 · 94 Comments

“Perhaps I was a bit too particular about what I wanted when I ordered my salad at lunch,” admits Daniel in Seattle. “I found this when I pulled it out of my bag back at the office.”

1 Bitch Salad

And from the Athens, Ohio Dept. of Disgruntled Baristas


related: Have it your way, jerk

Tags: cranky barista · most popular notes of 2010 · Ohio · restaurant · Seattle

Don’t you want to LIVE?

September 13th, 2010 · 70 Comments

These two notes — both from Oregon — give me the urge to grab a gigantic fistful of napkins…and then noisily blow my nose with them. I mean, really. Wouldn’t a simple “Al Gore Knows” have sufficed?

Do you NEED that STACK of napkins? Did you know napkins come from TREES. TREES make oxygen. OXYGEN gives you LIFE! Don't you want to LIVE? I do, that's for sure! Think about it!! PLEASE conserve!!! Thank you! (No shit!!!)

NAPKINS are for current customers of this store only! They Are Not Kleenex

(Thanks to Anonymous in Wilsonville and Brad in Albany for submitting!)

related: Your light switch has blue balls.

Tags: "customer service" · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · irregular capitalization · Oregon · restaurant · The Earth

Things not to flush down the toilet: your hopes, your dreams…your sweaters

September 1st, 2010 · 60 Comments

Linda spotted this little work of artistic genius at Louie’s Cafe in Santa Fe, New Mexico:

Don't Flush: Tampons Maxi Pads Paper Towels Cigarette Butts One Night Stands Cellphones Condoms Love Letters Junk Mail Sweaters Socks Hopes Goldfish Dreams Diapers Make-up Wallets Maps Gum Poetry Babies Puppies  Your Ex

related: Please do not flush…anything.

Tags: all clogged up · most popular notes of 2010 · restaurant · toilet

Service with a snarl

August 23rd, 2010 · 77 Comments

Fact: Working in a customer service position that necessitates long-term exposure to one’s fellow humans carries a significant risk of developing acute, potentially incurable, misanthropy. And if you’re stuck in the middle of nowhere, treatment is especially hard to find.

Exhibit a) From a roadside store in “the armpit of California, as witnessed on separate occasions by both Dirk and Danielle

We have no choice but to be here. We have already spent a fortune on this business. In order to run this business in the middle of nowhere it costs us a fortune. You have a choice to be a customer or not. Thank you for not complaining to our employees. We are here to serve you.

We have no choice but to be here. We have already spent a fortune on this business. In order to run this business in the middle of nowhere it costs us a fortune. You have a choice to be a customer or not. Thank you for not complaining to our employees. We are here to serve you.

Exhibit b) From a NON-fast food restaurant in the backwaters of Louisiana

Without any further notice: Prices subject to change without notifying the customer, yes you the customer. No refunds or exchange...once you order, once we start cooking,NO refunds or exchange. Includes anything in the store that's for sale. WE ARE NOT FAST FOOD WE ARE NOT FAST FOOD

Exhibit c) From a diner in a speck of a town called Endicott, Nebraska. (Adds submitter Jill: “They also have a stuffed two-headed calf!”)

Notice! This is not Burger King. You get it my way or you don't get the son-of-a-bitch at all

related: How’s that for a low price guarantee?

Tags: "customer service" · restaurant · retail hell