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Entries Tagged as 'retail hell'

Questionably moist bills

June 8th, 2015 · 82 Comments

Summer’s here! And you know what that means….

Due to rising summer temperatures, we will NOT be accepting boob or sock money. Questionably moist bills are subject to denial. We're sorry, but it's gross.

(via reddit)

Meanwhile, our submitter Ellen spotted this one at a drive-through daiquiri-store in Louisiana. “Apparently, you can buy everclear in a Styrofoam cup at 11 am without leaving your car, just you can’t pay for it with boob money.”

Due to sanitary reasons. We will not and cannot accept money that comes out of a bra.

related: Elevator nose grease. It’s a thing, apparently.

 

Tags: money · retail hell · that's disgusting · that's unsanitary

No food, no farts, no drama

March 13th, 2015 · 56 Comments

Spotted by Heather in P-town, Mass:

If you are crazy, stay out!

related: The snotty video store clerk lives!

Tags: retail hell · tourists

High Street high jinks

November 9th, 2014 · 33 Comments

Writes our submitter from London: “I can only imagine the local politics that brought about this pre-Christmas gem of a note in the historic town if Lewes, England.” Any Lewes locals out there who could shed some light on this light-box snub?

We were not asked to join in the high street archive display (despite being the most photographed building!) so instead of a light box we have a cardboard box! enjoy!!

related: Fish fingers and custard then, yeah?

Tags: retail hell · U.K.

Crafty like a fox

February 4th, 2014 · 46 Comments

Apparently the employees of this retail establishment in North Carolina didn’t take it seriously when the ladies from the shop next door asked them to stop blocking their employee entrance with garbage cans. (Perhaps  they didn’t understand what was meant by Don’t make us bedazzle your asses?)

One day, our submitter says, one of the offending trash cans was found covered in gift wrap, complete with a bow. Sadly, no photo was taken pre-unwrapping, but this sign remains in the shared hallway as a reminder.

Anything left up against this door is likely to be bedazzled, modge-podged, or glittered.  Seriously.  We love sparkly s%#&!

UPDATE: It looks like our crafty crafters followed through on their threats!

It's a fire exit

 

Make art, not war

related: Girls gone wild…with colored markers.

 

Tags: garbage · North Carolina · rainbow-colored · retail hell

If you’ve worked in retail, you can probably relate

August 8th, 2012 · 114 Comments

Writes Stephanie in Houston: “Looks like someone got a little tired of folding shirts.”

SHIRTS ALL SIZE LARGE ALL JUST ALIKE

related: Thanks for NOT shopping here!

Tags: Houston · retail hell

Welcome to Los Angeles

June 28th, 2012 · 52 Comments

Writes Lesley in Los Angeles: “My friend owns a store in Downtown L.A., and he constantly gets people (mostly tourists) coming in to ask him where they can find a public restroom. I guess he finally got fed up.”

All bathroom info requests must be done in iambic pentameter. (Also, we don't know where any public restrooms are. Welcome to downtown Los Angeles.)

related: The town recommends you hold it.

Tags: Los Angeles · most popular notes of 2012 · retail hell · toilet · tourists

So…atheists shop for free?

December 8th, 2011 · 43 Comments

Spotted by Analee at Houston’s annual Nutcracker Market, “a holiday shopping wonderland“…

This business belonds to God. If you steal from us you are stealing from Him. It's much cheaper to pay our price than His. Thanks!

related: No, He uses Vaseline.

Tags: God · guilt trip · Houston · retail hell · stealing

It’s a backbreaker.

December 4th, 2011 · 15 Comments

As amused as Emily in Houston was by this item description at the local Salvation Army store, she had to empathize a bit with the poor sucker who wrote it. (“The desk really was large and heavy-looking,” she says.)

The Salvation Army Family Store and Donation Center - $39.99 Item: HEAVY Desk Description: It's a backbreaker

related: We don’t want your ugly couches and heavy desks.

Tags: Houston · retail hell

Where cursing thieves with crippling violence has a 2000-year-old precedent

October 4th, 2011 · 28 Comments

Spotted by Vicky at an antiques shop in Bath, England: a modern twist on the ancient local tradition of curse tablets. (To quote Wikipedia: “About 130 curse tablets have been found at Aquae Sulis, now Bath in England, where many of the curses related to thefts of clothes whilst the victim was bathing.”)

Notice, to all prospective Shoplifters: We strongly recommend that prior to committing your despicable act you purchase one, or maybe two, of our very reasonably priced walking sticks (only £2 each) because if we catch you they will be a vital aid to you for at least 6 months. -Rolfey's P.s We also have a multi camera CCTV system

related: Law & Order: Social Media Unit

extra credit: Curse tablets of Roman Britain

Tags: not-so-veiled threats · retail hell · stealing · U.K.

Not one for small talk, eh?

September 7th, 2011 · 33 Comments

Spotted by Helen in the window of a shop in Haworth, West Yorkshire.

(It was closed.)

BEFORE YOU ASK: YES, A LOT OF SHOPS ARE CLOSED. NO, I DON'T KNOW WHEN THEY'LL BE OPEN. NO, I DON'T KNOW IF THEY'LL BE OPEN. IN FACT, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHEN THIS SHOP WILL BE OPEN. YES, THE WEATHER IS POOR/BEAUTIFUL/CRAP. NO, WE DON'T SELL NEWSPAPERS.

related: A not-so-subtle clue that your co-worker isn’t up for cubicle small talk

Tags: "customer service" · let me stop you right there · retail hell · small talk · U.K.