Entries Tagged as 'retail hell'

So…atheists shop for free?

December 8th, 2011 · 43 Comments

Spotted by Analee at Houston’s annual Nutcracker Market, “a holiday shopping wonderland“…

This business belonds to God. If you steal from us you are stealing from Him. It's much cheaper to pay our price than His. Thanks!

related: No, He uses Vaseline.

Tags: God · guilt trip · Houston · retail hell · stealing

It’s a backbreaker.

December 4th, 2011 · 15 Comments

As amused as Emily in Houston was by this item description at the local Salvation Army store, she had to empathize a bit with the poor sucker who wrote it. (“The desk really was large and heavy-looking,” she says.)

The Salvation Army Family Store and Donation Center - $39.99 Item: HEAVY Desk Description: It's a backbreaker

related: We don’t want your ugly couches and heavy desks.

Tags: Houston · retail hell

Where cursing thieves with crippling violence has a 2000-year-old precedent

October 4th, 2011 · 28 Comments

Spotted by Vicky at an antiques shop in Bath, England: a modern twist on the ancient local tradition of curse tablets. (To quote Wikipedia: “About 130 curse tablets have been found at Aquae Sulis, now Bath in England, where many of the curses related to thefts of clothes whilst the victim was bathing.”)

Notice, to all prospective Shoplifters: We strongly recommend that prior to committing your despicable act you purchase one, or maybe two, of our very reasonably priced walking sticks (only £2 each) because if we catch you they will be a vital aid to you for at least 6 months. -Rolfey's P.s We also have a multi camera CCTV system

related: Law & Order: Social Media Unit

extra credit: Curse tablets of Roman Britain

Tags: not-so-veiled threats · retail hell · stealing · U.K.

Not one for small talk, eh?

September 7th, 2011 · 33 Comments

Spotted by Helen in the window of a shop in Haworth, West Yorkshire.

(It was closed.)

BEFORE YOU ASK: YES, A LOT OF SHOPS ARE CLOSED. NO, I DON'T KNOW WHEN THEY'LL BE OPEN. NO, I DON'T KNOW IF THEY'LL BE OPEN. IN FACT, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHEN THIS SHOP WILL BE OPEN. YES, THE WEATHER IS POOR/BEAUTIFUL/CRAP. NO, WE DON'T SELL NEWSPAPERS.

related: A not-so-subtle clue that your co-worker isn’t up for cubicle small talk

Tags: "customer service" · let me stop you right there · retail hell · U.K.

Law & Order: Social Media Unit

August 29th, 2011 · 55 Comments

Kelly in Halifax was on her way to the bus terminal when a note in the window of a small souvenir shop caught her eye. A few days later, she spotted an update, too.

On Facebook, YouTube...PLEASE HELP ME FIND THEIR PARENTS. They need to know what their children do outside their homes. Their shoplifting behaviors should be stopped and corrected. Collin, please turn yourself in. If not, a criminal charge will be made.

On Facebook, YouTube...PLEASE HELP ME FIND THEIR PARENTS. They need to know what their children do outside their homes. Their shoplifting behaviors should be stopped and corrected. The young man on the photo has made an apology to the store. His photos will be removed when he pays for the products.

(And no, the black bars weren’t present in the original photos.)

related: Well, that’s one way to get your landlord’s attention.

Tags: Canada · Halifax · public shaming · retail hell · stealing

…and leave off the last “S” for “stolen”?

August 24th, 2011 · 39 Comments

Allie in Ypsilanti, Michigan was walking into her local Target store when she noticed this little art installation on the sidewalk outside. Granted, she says, “The closest Wal-Mart is about two miles away, and I have no idea how the cart got there either.”

The chalk artist had also drawn purple arrows across the parking lot in the direction of the Wal-Mart, and while Allie says she didn’t check to see if the chalk lines extended all the way to the store, “drawing the arrows but not taking the cart back would have been pretty P-A.”

Thi [sic] is from Wal-Mart. How did it get here?

Meanwhile, Michi spotted this piece of guerilla knitwork chained to a post near NYU. (“It was, on inspection, empty.”)

DON'T STEAL FROM PUBLIC

related: To whoever left this cart here — you are precisely what is wrong with America!

extra credit: Why Wal-Mart’s current business model is doomed [AdAge]

Tags: Michigan · retail hell · WTF?

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