Shaun in Austin spotted this mysterious complaint in the men’s room at his office. (Apparently all of the males employed there are very, very sensitive.)
Entries Tagged as 'rhetorical question'
January 24th, 2012 · 59 Comments
July 24th, 2011 · 49 Comments
Writes Stacey in Massachusetts: “The church around the corner from my house is famous for the little rants on their sign, but this one definitely takes the cake.” Obviously, texting while driving isn’t cool, but as Stacey put it: “For a church, it just seems a bit…hostile.”
Meanwhile, I just opened up the August issue of Texas Monthly to see this slightly more gently worded version…
related: Sincerely, God
extra credit: Church sign generator
October 21st, 2010 · 160 Comments
Cait spotted this artful example of parental passive-aggression “in front of a very, very wealthy residence” in New York’s East Village. “I get that ripping up the flowers was a douchey move,” Cait says, “but this seems a little over the top.”
To which I’d add: Um, yes. (They had me at the first semicolon.)
Meanwhile, across the globe, another 4-year-old was given a similar learning experience. In Australia, however, they don’t bother beating around the bush.*
*Apologies. Bad pun intended.
Tags: Australia · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · guilt trip · kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · New York · rhetorical question · runaway run-on sentences · semicolon abuse · stealing · TL;DR · Won't somebody think of the children? · You call that punctuation?
May 13th, 2010 · 139 Comments
Every day, you watch them, in horror: Those vile, germ-laden, nether-region-wiping creatures who don’t wash their hands after using the toilet. Confronting the offenders directly wouldn’t work, because, well, you’re passive-aggressive, and that’s just not how you roll. So what to do next?
Well, you could dazzle them with some accusatory statistics…
…or attempt to appeal to the altruists in the audience.
And maybe try to lure in the sports fans with the promise of some fun trivia!
If they see through that little scheme, you could try patronizing your patrons outright…
…or just straight-up treat them like four-year-olds. (“Did you wash your hands?” “Yes.” “DID YOU WASH YOUR HANDS?” “I said yes!!!”)
Perhaps even a dash of reverse psychology?
Of course, those less-straightforward techniques just might just backfire on you. In that case, you could play the bully with THE CLIP ART THAT MUST BE STOPPED.
Or, if your clip-art collection is a bit larger…release the dragon!
Not scary enough? Maybe it’s time to bust out the F word.
Or the even scarier F-word: FECAL-ORAL.
And if that still doesn’t work? Well, I guess you’ll just have to flounce away, invest in some latex gloves, and vow to hold it ’til you get home.
(Thanks to Jen in Houston, Jenni in Spokane, Marley in Pittsburgh, Lindsey in Memphis, Laura in Richmond, and the many anonymous submitters for their contributions.)
extra credit: “On Washing Hands,” by Atul Gawande
extra extra credit: “Maybe You Touched Your Genitals” Liquid Hand Soap
December 16th, 2009 · 214 Comments
As this note from Columbus, Ohio demonstrates, ’tis the season to be hilariously self-righteous!
related: All I want for Christmas
March 23rd, 2009 · 116 Comments
Our submitter, Glenn, says this all-staff e-mail “just kinda sucked the life out of us” around his office. “It was like a Mom saying ‘Guess what, kids?” in a really excited voice, and then saying ‘You’re going to the dentist!!!‘”
But the best part of this note — besides the pitch-perfect forced jollity — is the fact that at the time this message was sent, only one person in the office (Glenn) happened to have long sideburns and a “fun” faux hawk. So, gosh darn it, life is still good!
related: the classic all-staff e-mail
October 28th, 2008 · 88 Comments
“If it wasn’t for the handwriting,” says Lauren in California, “I would have guessed my mom wrote it.”
Meanwhile, Carson in Valencia found this note (crudely laminated with packing tape) attached to a tree while walking his dog in the park. “Maybe next time Maggie will think twice about leaving her ceramic cats unattended,” he says.
And in Seattle…
“In the pot-snatcher’s defense, people leave furniture and the like on the street all over this area of town as acts of charity, so it definitely would have been an easy mistake for anyone to make,” Josef says, adding: “When I took this picture, the homeowner was glaring at me from the garage the whole time. Bad vibes, man.”
related: Neighborhood Crazy-Watch
March 24th, 2008 · 43 Comments
Spotted by doppelfrog at London’s Paddington station…
related: Water, water everywhere
December 4th, 2007 · 125 Comments
November 8th, 2007 · 147 Comments
This just in: starving unborn children aren’t the only casualties of office fridge lunch thievery. As one anonymous New Yorker reports, now the sick and the infirm are being picked off, too!
(Thank you kindly? Best wishes? Hungry on the 12th floor, you kill me.)