“You know when you drink so much that you can’t remember what you did the night before?” asks our anonymous Scottish pizza bandit. “Sometimes we’re lucky enough to encounter certain things which trigger memories of our alcohol-fueled rampage. I was lucky enough to come across this the next day.”
Entries Tagged as 'roommates'
September 24th, 2007 · 128 Comments
September 22nd, 2007 · 163 Comments
As a little weekend bonus, I bring you this screed from the Smith Daily Jolt’s alumnae forum. Yes, it’s long.
September 1st, 2007 · 200 Comments
The Coast newspaper in Halifax recently invited its readers to share their “passive-aggressive roommate tales.” (Gee, what a novel idea!)
My favorite part:
Excerpts from a 34-point note sent to a former roommate:
2. Your rent was always late and it was not paid in full.
4. You used the dishes and baking ware that we provided to you and often did not clean them, left them to ruin, or left them for someone else to clean because you were too busy rushing out the door to go party when you had all day off. If you have all day off, do something more than try to find someone, anyone to hang out with that night that just so happens to have a car and is willing to pick your lazy ass up.
22. Your friends have no right to use and mess up our bathroom. You have your own, it’s part of your room. Also, if they are going to be putting fruit remains in our garbage can, have them removed before they rot. While we’re on the subject…
23. Fruit flies. Need I say more?
25. We were quite upset that you didn’t buy us anything for Christmas worth more than $3. It’s not the money really, but $1.50 each, that’s just insulting. We noticed that week you borrowed money from your current fling to go out and party. I hope you did buy a self-help book at Chapters like you said you were planning.
29. When people have to work very early in the morning, like at 5am, it’s not very nice to have your loud-mouthed boyfriend chatting with you all night, take it somewhere else. Like his mom’s house where he still lives…
30. The clogged toilet thing, you got off easy on that one. Plumbing and property damage is a lot more important than rushing out the door to hang out with your friends. Prioritize.
33. The comment you made about being the type of person who can’t live with someone is something you should take serious consideration of. How are you going to continue living your faux Sex and the City lifestyle if your goal in life is to find a man you can live with, and if you are not the type of person that can actually live with someone?” B.M.
Full story here; another choice excerpt after the jump.
August 23rd, 2007 · 242 Comments
Annie writes, “This a note my roommate left me expressing her discontent with me because I would, while straightening up, put her placemats back in the drawer. I was putting away her placemats to clean up…but also because they are the most hideous things I have ever seen [see exhibit b]. She also got mad at me for putting out my old bathmat while I was washing hers. I especially like that she assumes I will ‘trash it’ when I am ready.”
EXHIBIT B, the placemats:
August 8th, 2007 · 50 Comments
In all fairness, says Brandi in Austin, “This note was written after our dishes became so caked with fungus that we had to buy new stuff. The smell was also REALLY bad.”
August 8th, 2007 · 108 Comments
Jenn in San Francisco received this little from a then-roommate who she lived with for a year but barely ever saw or spoke to. Says Jenn, “She was rarely seen outside the confines of her own room and seemed to prefer communicating electronically and then, only when absolutely necessary. So you can imagine, she probably stewed on the issue for a very long time. ” (Click the image to enlarge.)
Adds Jenn: Guess how this flexible-thinking roommate paid her bills? “By conducting CULTURAL SENSITIVITY TRAINING COURSES TO CORPORATE EMPLOYEES.”
July 31st, 2007 · 43 Comments
Back in 2006, Austin in London didn’t feel like confronting his roommate about the masses of hair that were clogging the bathroom sink. Instead, he wrote him this special poem.
Adds Austin: “My roommate never actually said anything about the note, but he did clean the drain out by the time I’d arived home…so I assume he got the message.”
July 30th, 2007 · 32 Comments
Justin in Winston-Salem, N.C. spotted this classic mom note on the fridge at his friends’ house — with a bonus roommate note, to boot!
Says Justin: “I love the magnet — not sure if it’s supposed to be a letter grade or not, but I prefer to think that it is. If they get an F, I’d get a negative B or so.”
(Wings, corn dogs, taquitos AND mac & cheese? Ah, college.)
July 26th, 2007 · 106 Comments
“Is it doubly passive aggressive to use this site to convey this message? I am the creator of this note, and the photo depicts actual conditions. I would love to send a post of this to said roommate at work.” —flushpatrol in Washington, D.C.
July 25th, 2007 · 50 Comments
Semarr prefaces this submission by saying: “I realize it’s not particularly *passive* aggressive, but in context it became so.” She explains:
There were eight people living in the house. One of them collected shelter cats and kept them in the basement. I found this note when I had come home from work very late at night. By morning, the board was blank and Jon L-W denied it ever existed, and all roommates at the next ‘house meeting’ refused to admit there were any aggressive undertones in house. Jon said he loved the cats. Other earlier voiced-behind-backs complaints were whole-heartedly denied.
Adds Semarr: “I moved out a month later.”
related: My cat-shit crazy neighbor