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Entries Tagged as 'roommates'

Some things to know about your new roommate

October 18th, 2012 · 106 Comments

Shortly after he moved out, our submitter in Canada discovered that her ex-roommate had glued a memo for the room’s future occupant inside his bedroom closet — “his final passive-aggressive attempt to get under my skin.”

Caution: Some things to know Her dog stinks up entire house so close your door and get an air freshener. Roommate plays loud music and stays up all night talking on Skype and POF (very annoying) She has a high body temperature and never turns on heat, she will tell you to buy a box heater (annoying) Arguing with her is like boxing a glacier She yells at her dog all the time (annoying as fuck) She has an annoying voice and is a control freak She washes dishes and doesn't take them out of sink (annoying but also just fn weird) Overall, we're dealing with quite the peculiar roommate, good luck!

related: You’re not as bad as everyone warned me you’d be!

Tags: "helpful" advice · Canada · roommates

Signed, The Cat

September 27th, 2012 · 70 Comments

From a house full of roommates in Texas, our submitter calls this “a prime example of ‘dogs have owners, cats have staff.’”

Anna, please clean my vomit. Thanks. —Cat

related: Hendrix is the cat

Tags: cats · cleaning · roommates · vomit

The Go to Hell™ Bouquet

June 13th, 2012 · 19 Comments

“My friend and her roommate did not get along at all in college,” says Bryan in Chicago, “to the point where they were only communicating by notes for the last six months they lived together. This is the last note my friend left before officially moving out.”

I cleaned most of the apartment so please keep it tidy while you move out  - Kelsey.  P.S. go to hell

related: When frenemies attack!

Tags: cleaning · mean girls · p.s. · roommates

Flowcharts for a positive apartment-sharing experience

June 5th, 2012 · 56 Comments

Four roommates, a half-gallon of stolen ice cream, and 9 months worth of unflushed toilets went into the making of these two flowcharts.

Refrigerator flowchart

Bathroom Flow Chart: for a positive lavatory experience!

related: Hover & Flow(chart)

Tags: battle of the sexes · flow chart · food · fridge · most popular notes of 2012 · Ohio · roommates · toilet

Monster in my bed

April 22nd, 2012 · 130 Comments

Writes our submitter in Virginia: “One of my (two) roommates is convinced that someone is sleeping in her bed when she is not here. Even though NO ONE has slept in her bed, angry text messages have been exchanged about these mystery sleepover guests, but (like everything else) she has never confronted us face to face. The other night, I stumbled across this gem on her pillows when I dared to enter her room to turn off the light she leaves on for days upon days.”

Do NOT sleep in my bed. I will be able to tell, and I will be PISSED. I respect your stuff, so please respect mine. And if you think this note is weird, I think it's even weirder that you're in here reading it. :)

related: Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Quarters

Tags: roommates · sleeping · smiley · Virginia

When frenemies attack

April 17th, 2012 · 90 Comments

Well, girls, I’d say you have at least few things in common…unfortunately for the rest of us.

ATTN Roomies: You are jerks for locking me out of the room while I was in the shower. I hate you all. We have nothing in common anymore, and are officially no longer friends. That is all. -Caley

Dear Caley, We did that on purpose. We all secretly hate you. We have nothing in common. -Ayesha :) P.S. We're gonna do it again...

related: Yes, this is from a college campus.

Tags: college life · heart · mean girls · roommates · smiley · Texas

How to deal with a chronically messy roommate once and for all

April 1st, 2012 · 19 Comments

The strategic box placement — in what appears to be a minefield of dog turds — is bad enough. But the really passive-aggressive part? Apparently, the box wasn’t taped shut on the bottom.

Since you were too busy to clean anything before you moved out, I thought I'd save you a few trips up the stairs for the rest of your stuff. You're welcome!

related: “I don’t miss them.” 

Tags: cleaning · Idaho · moving/not moving · roommates

Right…that seems like a logical response.

March 13th, 2012 · 49 Comments

Dave in London returned home one day to find all of his clothes missing. Apparently, this was his roommate’s rationale.

When you slam the door I woke up and feel deprived of sleep all night. Therefore I took your clothes. I hope you got the point.

related: “Dollar sign flower slams easily”

Tags: door-slamming · London · roommates

Well, that’s terrifying.

March 6th, 2012 · 35 Comments

Though this may look like the the bloody rantings of a serial killer, Tino in Stuttgart, Germany says this was simply his flatmate’s way of stating his displeasure at the ongoing lack of parity in toilet-paper purchasing.

(Tino’s rough translation: YOU ASSES[,] BUY SOME TOILET PAPER.)


And my favorite part…


related: Comrades, take notice!

Tags: Deutsche · Germany · heart · roommates · toilet paper

The slippery slope is slippery

February 26th, 2012 · 53 Comments

When it comes to this particular student share house, “It seems that the pure, unadulterated essence of corporate greed is found in forgetting to turn of the tap,” our submitter writes. “Clearly, society is a snarky bitch.”

Louise, not everyone has chosen the same destructive path as you have, mindless corporate MUPPET, and not everyone wants to set the world ablaze with greed, extortion and squander. So please, next time you use the toilet, turn the tap off. Many thanks, Society

P.S. Corporate Muppet, you say?










related: A not-so-friendly handshake

Tags: bathroom · roommates · The Earth · U.K.