Entries Tagged as 'roommates'

Well, someone’s feeling a little chippy…

May 18th, 2011 · 59 Comments

How long will your slob of a flatmate neglect her fallen french fry on the filthy carpet of your shared living space?

Well, if your flatmate is Bex in Stoke, England…long enough for it to be transformed into a small art installation, apparently.

Hi Bex I'm your floor chip I miss you XXX

EAT ME

related: Grimace and the fry kids

Tags: anthropomorphism · cleaning · food · roommates · U.K.

And don’t you DARE clean out the freezer — I have important bills in there!

May 1st, 2011 · 91 Comments

“My roommate is a total slob,” says Elinor in Toronto, so after two weeks away from the apartment, she wasn’t too surprised to see the kitchen piled high with several delightfully fragrant, filled-to-the-brim garbage bags. When she went to throw them out, Elinor discovered one of the bags was actually filled with clothes, so she put that one in her roommate’s room.

The next morning, Elinor found both of these notes slid under her bedroom door.

[note 1:] Dear Elinor, You threw out an important bag of clothes that was in the kitchen. If you don't know what it is, don't touch it. -for FUCK SAKES! [note 2:] Never mind -found it ...sorry

related: Stop! Don’t chute!

Tags: garbage · Oops? · roommates · Toronto · touching

Some relationship advice from your roommate

April 10th, 2011 · 53 Comments

Vanessa in Baton Rouge can vouch that that the state of her friend Charles’s bathroom and boudoir is “perpetually dirty.” Oddly, though, “of all the times I’ve been over to Charles’ apartment with his girlfriend, I’ve never, ever seen his roommate.”

(Which makes me wonder…could this note from Charles’s “roomie” actually have been written by said girlfriend? I’m not sure which scenario would be more passive-aggressive.)

Charles, Here's a thought. If you would like your girlfriend to come over more, maybe you should try cleaning up your room and BATHROOM. love, roomie :)

Tags: "helpful" advice · Baton Rouge · cleaning · roommates · sig o · signed with love · smiley

Roommate wanted: NO OLDS!

March 27th, 2011 · 49 Comments

To the genius in Illinois who posted this want ad: if your experience interviewing random would-be roommates hasn’t convinced you already, our archives provides ample proof than “bitchy” is far from synonymous with “old.”

Roommate Needed ASAP No Old people please I don't need a bitchy old roommate. lv. message 450 per mo.

related: Snowed in? Come meet your neighbors! (Unless you’re like, old.)

Tags: Illinois · old folks · roommates

I can feel your teeth clenching from here :)

March 22nd, 2011 · 74 Comments

Be afraid, roomies. Be very afraid.

maybe someone should do the dishes? because it kind of smells like shit in here :D (i won't be doing them because I've done them the last 4-5 times) LOVE YOU GUYS :)

related: I don’t complain.

Tags: "helpful" advice · dishes · martyr complex · odor · roommates · signed with love · smiley

Kitty Containment: A global issue

March 14th, 2011 · 102 Comments

Greta from Sydney couldn’t help but take notice when her new flatmate affixed no fewer than five pleas for feline containment around their home. Greta’s takeaway? “I don’t think I’m supposed to let the cat out.”

The cat ('Bones') is now here. he has to stay in for at least 2 weeks. IF YOU OPEN ANY DOOR OR WINDOW: MAKE SURE THE CAT CAN'T ESCAPE

DON'T LET THE CAT OUT K,THX

DON'T LET THE CAT OUT


Don't Let the cat out (he's in there)DON'T LET THE CAT OUT

While this plethora of preventative postings might strike some as overkill, Jens from Oman informs us that his flatmate did in fact release his friend Jerry’s cat “while in an intoxicated state.” Though the cat was recovered, a “massive reward” was required, prompting Jerry to place these helpful notes on their front door.

Just in case you are stupid enough not to remember I live here

DO NOT let the cat out when u leave or open this door

Finally, we received this bulletin from Michelle and Guy, spotted at their local postoffice in Harpers Ferry, West Virginia. Though not actually passive-aggressive, we still felt that it was our civic duty to share this alarming note with our readers.

Attention Cat Owners!

related: I’M A CAT. It’s okay for me to play outside. Seriously.

Tags: animal welfare · blitzkrieg approach · cats · roommates

That rug really tied the room together, did it not?

March 7th, 2011 · 129 Comments

So, like, “our friend got really drunk and stayed in our room, but when she got up to pee, she opened up the door to our suitemate’s room instead of the bathroom and peed on the rug,” writes our submitter in California. “It was apparently his favorite rug and since he’s spoiled, he asked her to get him a new one.”

Um, okay. “Spoiled,” or not, I’m gonna have to side with the dude here. Offering to clean/replace the rug seems like the very least Drunky McDrunkface could do, no?

Hey Christina, Thanks for pissing on our carpet while we were trying to sleep. You owe me a new one, and maybe you shouldn't drink so much. Your friends in 21C.

related: You’re not wrong, Walter.

Tags: actually totally reasonable · California · drizzunk · frenemies · piss · roommates · thanks (but not really)

I love you, you’re perfect, now leave

February 28th, 2011 · 66 Comments

Writes an anonymous roommate  in Virginia: “Apparently living with me and my roommates is so terrible that after leaving the house, this girl felt the need to advise [my other] ‘rooms’ to stay at her boyfriend’s house and not with us.” Adds our (not-at-all bitter) submitter: “The only batteries she needs to recharge are the ones that go in her vibrator.”

Rooms [sic], I need to go home & charge my batteries. The energy in this house literally sucks the life out of me and I need to be somewhere that makes me happy right now. I LOVE YOU, and I hope you stay at Chris's tonight!

related: Why can’t we all just get along? Don’t be bitches!

Tags: literally incorrect word usage · mean girls · nice stationery · roommates · signed with love · Virginia

The most inane thing since sliced bread

September 8th, 2010 · 76 Comments

Really, folks? You share a kitchen and a bathroom, and this is all you’ve got to complain about?

::sigh:: White bread problems…

This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen in a fridge. You can't REFRIDGERATE [sic] TOAST!

Matt if you crinkle anymore [sic] bread I will put those pieces in your bed :)

(Thanks to Sarah Jane in Australia and Michelle in Canada for submitting!)

related: Is this a thing now?

extra credit: Toasted Toast Post-it Notes [Amazon.com]

Tags: Australia · bread · roommates · siblings · smiley · spelling and grammar police · Waterloo

Live and not-so-active roommate culture

August 22nd, 2010 · 78 Comments

Elana in North Rustico, Canada spotted this tart exchange inside her friend Shannon’s fridge.

Shannon, no doubt hoping to avoid getting called out for interfering with her roommate’s yogurt supply, wrote the first note. Her roommate Michael, perhaps taking issue with the note’s mildly patronizing tone, fired back with his own written retort. And as for the yogurts? Yup, still in the fridge.

These yogurts expired July 24 Today is Aug 12. What should we do? Run for our lives

related: Who’s the smartass?

Tags: Canada · fridge · most popular notes of 2010 · rebuttals · roommates · smartass · yogurt