Entries Tagged as 'old folks'

But…but…I’m late for bingo!

September 11th, 2014 · 41 Comments

Zee spotted this warning in the basement parking garage of her small senior citizens‘ building in Indiana, where, she says, “a few of the residents prefer posting anonymous notes to dealing with their issues directly.”

*PLEASE* SLOW DOWN SPEED IS 10 MPH NEXT TIME I WILL PUBLISH YOUR NAME AND YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!

…and other residents, not so much.

If you know their name, why not talk to them directly - or to the board - instead of leaving a passive-aggressive note?

related: That means you, young man in the blue Subaru!!

Tags: driving · Indiana · old folks · rebuttals · you know who you are

This is why people hate the Millennials

November 11th, 2013 · 285 Comments

Writes our submitter, a college student in Colorado who I would really like to smack some sense into: “We had a change in professors midway through the semester in my fiction workshop. The new professor does not understand that his class is not the absolute most important thing in the universe.”

(just click the image below to enlarge)

Rather than write a lengthy explanation of why it is a bad idea to come to my class without reading the material, or why typing away on your laptop or checking FB while I am speaking (or worse, while yours peers are leading discussion) is rude, I decided instead just to thank those of you who consistently come into class prepared and enthusiastic.

related: So, you were hoping to get an A for “asshole-like entitlement”?

Tags: actually totally reasonable · college life · Colorado · kids today · most popular notes of 2013

Dear toilet fairies: You totally suck at poetry.

September 5th, 2013 · 66 Comments

Katie says this was propped up in the ladies room at a senior citizen apartment building in Florida. Adds Katie: “I don’t care that they think the floor is dirtier, I’m not touching the floor either!”

Tinkle, tinkle, little star, Above the potty you hover so far. Crouching but high and almost motionless, Trying to avoid any germs, I guess. Very little do you know, More trouble lurks far below. You needn't worry about germs on the seat, Because the real germs to avoid are below you. Go ahead and plop your hinny right on down, You're sitting on the cleanest seat in town. Now, it you still insist on standing to pee, You are just leaving a mess for me. Author: Un-expecting Victim

related: Hover & Flow(chart); The Rhyme That Must Be Flushed

Tags: clip art catastrophe · Florida · old folks · pure poetry · toilet

Get Rich or Die Tryin’

March 14th, 2013 · 49 Comments

Ashley spotted this notice in the community room at her grandma’s senior living community in Minnesota. Says Ashley: “Apparently acting like a grown up is still hard when you’re over 80.”

Concerning Bingo Days: Many of you have come into my office complaining about each other from people yelling or giving orders or how many cards you should be able to have or coming in late! I will address the yelling and being disrespectful first. Everyone here is adults. There should be no reason why you can't be respectful to each other. Please try and refrain from opening your mouth and making it miserable for the people that are down here playing for fun and enjoyment! Next how many cards can I have? Well that's easy too. You can have as many that you can handle without infringing on your fellow players. So that means if you can't keep up and have to keep asking them to repeat the number then guess what? you have too many cards. Or if you take too many that there are not enough for everyone than guess what? You have too many cards. And third but not least please respect your fellow players and try to be down stairs and in your seat by 1:30. Remember Bingo is fun not to try and get rich or cut throat your neighbor. It's to get out of your apartment and see your neighbor and visit and enjoy the game. Enough said! Try acting like grown ups and set an example for each other. Thank you. Manager

related: The Rules for Strip Bingo

Tags: Minnesota · most popular notes of 2013 · old folks · spelling and grammar police · that's disrespectful

The cat came back

October 9th, 2012 · 67 Comments

I know I’m asking for trouble here, but when John in Missouri passed along this exchange between his father’s neighbor (an “interested animal lover”) and his father (a reluctant one), I just couldn’t resist.

Sir- I hope you are putting fresh water out for the gray cat on these very hot days. I see him laying out on your stoop looking miserable! It would be nice if he could come inside. The elderly lady that use to live there took good care of the cats. An interested Animal Lover

If the cat does not want to look quite so miserable it could go to the shade in the back yard. It will not drink water even on hottest days. I tried. I think the hot days are over. As you said, it is not my cat. It could sleep in garage if it wants to. It will not drink water, I have a witness. Please take the cat. Feed it. Water it. Please. Let it mess up your house.

Confidential to John’s Dad: I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

related: The Great Outdoor Cat Debate of 2012

Tags: "helpful" advice · cats · most popular notes of 2012 · neighbors · old folks

Another year older, but not necessarily wiser

March 30th, 2012 · 83 Comments

“When I saw the first post on Facebook, I thought it was a rather aggressive joke,” our submitter says. “Then I saw her response two days later, when only 45 people (yes, I counted) wished her a happy birthday on her wall.” What a tough world we live in! (sob)

Tuesday: "It's my birthday tomorrow I am expect a Facebook post from everyone. Thanks" Thursday: "Thanks to everyone who posted on my facebook wall for my birthday. I am disappointed in those of you who saw it was my birthday and did not post wishing me will, but I guess that that is the world we live in and I am coming to accept that in my 22 years of age. Thank you"

related: Facebook, a place for narcissists

Tags: birthday · Facebook · kids today · most popular notes of 2012

DON’T STOP (being old and cranky)

December 7th, 2011 · 49 Comments

Kids today!!!

[STOP] That means YOU young man in the blue Subaru and turn the music down

(Thanks to Robyn from Durango, Colorado for the submission.)

related: Roommate wanted…NO OLDS!!!

Tags: Colorado · driving · kids today · most popular notes of 2011 · old folks

Grandpas can guilt-trip, too!

May 19th, 2011 · 45 Comments

Dara’s birthday is coming up, and her grandpa sent her this card. (Explains Dara: “He calls birthdays ‘anniversaries’ because ‘you only have one birth day.’) Nice, huh? And we haven’t even gotten to the guilt-trippy part yet.

“He lives in Florida and I live in upstate New York.” Dara says. “I went to visit my parents in NYC a few weeks ago and he chose to visit them the day after I left. Somehow that’s my fault.”

Hi Dara. Happy Anniversary. We don't see enough of each other but I guess that can't be helped. All my love GrandPa

related: Don’t worry, I’m alive. Not that you’d care. I’m only your mother!

Tags: Binghamton · birthday · family · guilt trip · New York · old folks · signed with love

Oh Grandpa, you tell the funniest bedtime stories!

April 12th, 2011 · 65 Comments

Hannah spotted this gem above the sink of dirty dishes in her San Francisco office.

Someday when you're wondering why you're alone and society has all but crumbled around you, you'll think back to the dishes you left in the sink and you'll say

related: May the sanctity of the sink prevail!!

Tags: dishes · guilt trip · kids today · most popular notes of 2011 · San Francisco · TL;DR

Roommate wanted: NO OLDS!

March 27th, 2011 · 49 Comments

To the genius in Illinois who posted this want ad: if your experience interviewing random would-be roommates hasn’t convinced you already, our archives provides ample proof than “bitchy” is far from synonymous with “old.”

Roommate Needed ASAP No Old people please I don't need a bitchy old roommate. lv. message 450 per mo.

related: Snowed in? Come meet your neighbors! (Unless you’re like, old.)

Tags: Illinois · old folks · roommates