Entries Tagged as 'old folks'
So, Brandon in San Diego had a party, and apparently people stayed out pretty late playing beer pong in the yard — a yard which happens to be just outside the bedroom window of the neighbors, an older couple in their 70s. The morning after, our submitter Mallory says, Brandon woke up to find this taped to his front door.
Final score: Brandon, o. Sweet little old lady, EPIC WIN!
related: My condolences on your birthday
Tags: actually totally reasonable · neighbors · noise · old folks · San Diego
Erin in Arlington, Virginia says this sign appeared in every elevator in her building during the D.C. area’s Snowmaggedon of 2010. “Apparently cabin fever requires drinks…and only people in their 20s and early 30s.”
related: no girls allowed
Tags: neighbors · Northern Virginia · old folks
Joel in Glendale, California was raised in a religious Christian family, and apparently someone let it slip to his grandmother (bless her heart!) that he’s — gasp!— an atheist. Aaaaand…let the backhanded compliments begin!
Dear Joel, I have heard that you say you’re an athesis [sic]. I don’t believe that because you have so many Christian qualities. You are honest, loyal, kind and giving- not to mention handsome and extremely talented. (Now —Those are gifts from God!) Please use this check to have a great New Years day Breakfast.
Adds Joel: “I’d like to point out that she mailed me this check for $20 after I asked her not to send me money and she promised she wouldn’t. Lying isn’t very Christian, Grandma!”
related: Waiting for the Rapture (and/or a thank you note)
Tags: a little patronizing · family · Grandma · Jesus · old folks
“I live in a condominium building that is popular with the elderly,” writes our submitter from the Chicagoland area. Recently, he says, the building’s board of managers put copies of this note in everyone’s mailboxes and posted it in the lobby (so guests wouldn’t be spared the details, either.)
Adds our submitter: “I don’t know what’s more inappropriate: losing control of your bowels in the hallway or distributing this memo to all the residents.”
Meanwhile in depressing economic news, Sara in Kansas City, Missouri says her company’s last Christmas party was held in — wait for it — the rec center of a local retirement home. Revelers who stopped by the restroom were greeted with this cheerful reminder of OMG SHOOT ME NOW.
related: Dr. Freud’s Salon Scatologica
Tags: CAPS LOCK · Chicago · disturbingly detailed · old folks · shit · that's disgusting
Writes Ben in Snohomish, Washington: “We visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don’t do so daily. She took the occasion of my son’s 11th birthday to take a shot at us.”
related: my condolences on your birthday
Tags: birthday · family · guilt trip · Jesus · most popular notes of 2009 · old folks · Washington state
While some old folks (and grandmothers in particular) are seasoned masters of the heart-tugging passive-aggressive guilt trip, there’s another breed of blue-hairs who’ve seemingly given up on all the social niceties and instead just give their unfiltered opinion on any subject at hand. their all-purpose excuse, as demonstrated by this example from Tacoma, Washington: “I’m old!”
Yet while this group certainly helps make reading the “letters to the editor” page entertaining, Charity in Westfield, Wisconsin says the “grumpy old crank” routine isn’t quite as amusing when you have to live with one of them.
“I’ve been staying with my grandmother for two months,” Charity says, and “she tells me daily that I stink.” She woke up one morning to find this slightly more polite message….which was not-so-politely attached to toilet seat with packing tape.
related: A day in the life of a crank
Tags: Grandma · old folks
Daniel is Montreal says his dear grandmother sent him this card in the mail for his birthday. The front of the card (which didn’t scan very well) says: It is not what is visible on the surface but what is deep inside that sustains us.
Well, says Daniel, “that and guilt.”
related: Dear Grandma — thanks, I guess; How I “did” my grandma
Tags: birthday · Grandma · guilt trip · Montreal · old folks · signed with love
“We’ve had trouble with our downstairs neighbors since we moved in,” says Sara in Madison. “Well, really just one of them, a woman in her fifties.” This neighbor’s most recent dose of crazy appeared in the mailbox Sara shares with her roommate (“Little Buddy,” in crazy lady-speak).
I kinda prefer this note without any explanation whatsoever, but if you’re still craving more, Sara explains…sort of. “I had, in fact, bought and put a nozzle on the outside hose so I could spray down an animal cage. We do not, needless to say, have parties in the laundry room. In fact, we’ve never had a party, ever, because we’re too afraid of her.”
related: sheena is a paintballer
Tags: CAPS LOCK · crazypants · neighbors · noise · old folks · Wisconsin
Writes our anonymous submitter: “This was sent to my six-year-old step daughter by her grandma. The birthday present in question was a pack of writing paper and $5 American. We live in Canada.”
(The “did you get…” pretense combined with the oh-so-subtle post script is so classic “passive-aggressive grandma” that I cannot even handle it. Bonus points for the repurposed note paper!)
Meanwhile, Toni spotted this grandma’s thank-you note on a closed booth at a flea market in Lakewood, Ohio.
related: But…but…I didn’t forget!
Tags: birthday · Canada · Grandma · martyr complex · Ohio · old folks · p.s. · thanks (but not really) · xoxo
This note — spotted by Erik in a break room at Northwestern‘s Medill School of Journalism — takes me back to my days as a bright-eyed young reporter cheerfully slaving away at my college daily, where the grizzled old alumni “mentors” working at the Times or the Globe always seemed to have the same advice: if we were smart, we’d get the hell out of journalism before it was too late. (“Ha ha,” we’d laugh, awkwardly.) It’s somehow reassuring to know that kids today (“kids today!”) are still blithely ignoring their elders to pursue a degree that just might be the most unnecessary in higher education.
But seriously now. At this point, you’re like, “What is this biotch rambling on about? Doesn’t she know I don’t read text longer than 140 characters at a time? Show me the picture, dammit!” And that, young j-schoolers, is the topic of next week’s lecture.
related: the silverware segregationist
extra credit: the twitter explosion [american journalism review]
Tags: Chicago · college life · kids today · thanks (but not really) · xoxo