Entries Tagged as 'heart'

On Wednesdays we wear pink

June 5th, 2014 · 74 Comments

Our submitter in Chicago found these notes were in her son’s 8th grade autograph book. “Only a few other students are going to the same high school that my son will be attending,” she writes. “These two girls are part of that group and seem eager to get on to the next year of flame-throwing. I thought the heart was a nice, passive-aggressive touch.”

Adds our submitter: “The weird thing is that these girls both appear to be so nice and docile in person.”

I don't really like you much so don't really have much fun in high school. Hope I don't see you at L.P. -Jessie   We are both going to L P so I am glad you didn't choose drama. I hope you are different in high school. Then maybe we could be friends. -Ileana

related: So much for “Have a nice summer, see you next  year”

Tags: Chicago · heart · mean girls · schools & teachers · way harsh

I love you…but I love you more when you’re skinny.

February 11th, 2014 · 101 Comments

Writes Joshua in Salt Lake City: “This past year I’ve been trying to lose weight. It’s been up and down. Apparently my mother knows that.”

Happy Valentine's Day Josher! 'Skinny Josh Bag' Proud of you! What's the day without the candy bag...just 'Chew & Spit'

related: Mom is my favorite passive-aggressive Valentine

Tags: heart · hey fatty · Mother-son notes · Salt Lake City · signed with love · Valentine's Day · xoxo

Every once in a blue moon…

July 7th, 2013 · 40 Comments

Here’s something we rarely see around here: a happy ending!

Explains Amanda in Fort Collins, Colorado:  “Last week, the trailer that lives outside the Food Co-op had its wheel stolen, and they weren’t able to do the food drop-off. Disgruntled, Karen put this sign on the sad, one-wheeled trailer.”

TO THE PERSON WHO STOLE THE WHEEL FROM THIS TRAILER...this is used to bring food from the co-op to the hungry people of the rescue mission & the Matthews house. Thanks to you we can't do this anymore. Please consider how your actions affect the community. ? Fort Collins Food Finders

Then, Amanda says, “Three days ago, a man came into the co-op. He walked up to the register and, without saying anything, put a BRAND NEW trailer wheel on the counter. ‘I saw your sign,’ he said. ‘I used to eat at the Mission, but now I don’t need to. I wanted to bring you this.’” Then he walked out.

related: The Good Samaritan

Tags: Colorado · guilt trip · heart · most popular notes of 2013 · stealing

Señor Tapatío gets told.

March 3rd, 2013 · 47 Comments

Writes Randahl in Boise, Idaho: “I love me some Tapatío, and sometimes I forget to put it back in the fridge. My wife thought Mr. Tapatío should know his place.”

Mr. Tapatío

Dear Mr Tapatio, I hate your face. No matter how many times I put you back in the fridge you always reappear on the counter, kitchen table, dining table. You sir, are the herpes of my life. <3 Nicole XXOO

related: Eat it; love it. Got it?

Tags: fridge · heart · Idaho · love & marriage · xoxo

I know who’s not getting a merit badge for sharing…

February 27th, 2013 · 84 Comments

Now that Girl Scout cookie season has ended — here in Texas, anyway — shit’s starting to get real.

i know how many are in each box exactly...you eat. you die. ;) have a great day! ? cc

related: Killer cookie dough

Tags: die bitch die · food · heart · most popular notes of 2013 · sharing is caring

This Valentine’s Day, give the gift of honesty

February 14th, 2013 · 32 Comments

Rachel in New York City says one of her students proudly presented her with this card, adding, “I think it speaks for itself.”

Dear Rachel You are the 2nd best teacher Ever ? Love You

related: Happy Valentine’s Day to the groaner upstairs

Tags: heart · kids · most popular notes of 2013 · New York · schools & teachers · signed with love · Valentine's Day

The female of the species

February 13th, 2013 · 31 Comments

All alone this Valentine’s Day? Well…more Cheetos for you!

Dear Brodie, If you forget to put an elastic band or bag clip on the crackers again, I will strangle you in your sleep. Love, Kelsey xoxo

 

Dear sweet sweet AJ, Drink all of my Sprite again and I'll rip your f*cking head off. xoxo, E

(Thanks to Brodie in Nova Scotia and redditor ajbollom. May they rest in peace.)

related: That’s just [sic]

Tags: heart · not-so-veiled threats · signed with love · xoxo

The Boy Who Drank All the Milk: A first-world fable

January 23rd, 2013 · 60 Comments

Marcel in Montreal begins his story with the moral: “There are just some things you don’t mess with — vipers, rabid dogs, king cobras, black widows…and my mom.” His younger self, however, was far less wise. This is his tale.

For a long time, Marcel and his siblings had the irritating habit of drinking all the milk in the house late at night so that there was none left when their mother went to pour herself a bowl of cereal for breakfast the morning.

One day, Marcel and his siblings came home from school to find a batch of “the richest, most delicious brownies ever” sitting on the counter. Of course, they dug in immediately. But just as he was about to head to the fridge to pour himself a cold, tall glass of milk to wash down all that chocolate-y goodness, Marcel noticed this note from Mom hiding underneath the crumbs.

Maybe next time you'll think before you drink all the milk and don't replace it!! xoxo ? Mom

“Sacre bleu!” he cried, for sure enough, there was not a drop of milk to be found in the house. Leaving a trail of brownie crumbs behind him, he ran as fast as he could to the nearest dairy farm, where, shortly before hitting send on this submission, he was eaten by a very hungry wolf.

“Both Marcel and the brownies,” the wolf wrote, “were fucking delicious.”

related: The Boy Who Forgot to Clear His Browser History

Tags: heart · milk · Moms & Dads · Montreal · Mother-son notes · signed with love · xoxo

The City of Brotherly Littering

January 7th, 2013 · 18 Comments

“Understand,” writes Beck in Philadelphia, “I love this city. Filth and all.” But he also had to give props to this guerilla PSA — done in the style of the Philly Tourism Board’s “with love” ad campaign — adding, “I regret not actually being able to photograph all the trash that really was on the ground.”

Dear Citizens, Thanks for expecting everyone else to clean up your litter. With Love, Philadelphia xoxo

related: People of Philadelphia, these tomatoes are not for you!

Tags: heart · littering · Philadelphia · signed with love · xoxo

When frenemies attack

April 17th, 2012 · 90 Comments

Well, girls, I’d say you have at least few things in common…unfortunately for the rest of us.

ATTN Roomies: You are jerks for locking me out of the room while I was in the shower. I hate you all. We have nothing in common anymore, and are officially no longer friends. That is all. -Caley

Dear Caley, We did that on purpose. We all secretly hate you. We have nothing in common. -Ayesha :) P.S. We're gonna do it again...

related: Yes, this is from a college campus.

Tags: college life · heart · mean girls · roommates · smiley · Texas