Entries Tagged as 'smartass'
Hannah spotted this warning (and the accompanying Fire-Marshal takedown) posted at the University of Alaska art building in Juneau. On the ground floor.
“It’s the ground floor; only an idiot would use the stairs to escape a fire. There’s a door over there -> - if it’s on fire – <-There’s a door over there.”
“WHERE’S YOUR IMAGINATION?”
“DUH, HE SOLD IT TO PAY FOR COLLEGE.”
“What are you talking about? I’m imagining students cramming into the stairwell per this sign’s advice, just to get upstairs and see an identical sign directing them back down into the flames.”
Adding to the sign’s absurdity, Hannah says, is the fact that “the building is only two stories, and built at the base of an embankment. The upper floor can be accessed by the street on the upper level, and the lower level can be accessed either by stairs from the upper level or by at least four exit doors on the lower level.”
Tags: Alaska · college life · elevator · questionable logic · saga · smartass · that's a fire hazard
“Our receptionist is uber-paranoid about her stuff getting stolen, despite the fact that we are one of the rare offices where fridge theft isn’t a problem,” writes our anonymous submitter in South Carolina. “Though I’d be too scared to do it myself — the woman has a very nasty, underhanded side — I love that someone else decided to have a little fun with her.”
related: Who’s the smartass?
Tags: most popular notes of 2011 · office cop · office fridge · smartass
“I’m sure they didn’t actually paint the toilet seats,” says Brett in Syracuse. And yet, he says, when he saw this sign posted by a former co-worker, “I couldn’t stop laughing about the idea that that’s what got her.”
Perhaps a few signs like this (as spotted by Madeline at her university’s art studio) would have made for a proper rebuttal?
related: Ceci n’est pas une note passif-agressif
Tags: bathroom · college life · meta · office · sarcasm · smartass · thanks (but not really)
“My office just got a new style of paper which has caused quite the stir,” says our submitter in Seattle. “It’s made from forested trees, or something like that, so obviously we can’t wait to use it.”
related: Nothing fosters community like shared network printers!
Tags: blitzkrieg approach · meta · Seattle · smartass
Based on this example — spotted by Erin in the employee restroom of an AT&T Store in Los Angeles — I think the Kiwis have a clear edge over us Yanks…at least when it comes to smartass bathroom snark.
related: The bathroom-stall booger epidemic
extra credit: National stereotypes according to Google Autofill [buzzfeed.com]
Tags: art · bathroom · nose-picking · retail hell · smartass
Today’s dose of bathroom humor is brought to you by our submitter, Johnny in New Zealand, with the contributions of two anonymous would-be Conchords.
related: The yogurt’s expired. Run for your lives!
Tags: all clogged up · New Zealand · smartass · toilet
Elana in North Rustico, Canada spotted this tart exchange inside her friend Shannon’s fridge.
Shannon, no doubt hoping to avoid getting called out for interfering with her roommate’s yogurt supply, wrote the first note. Her roommate Michael, perhaps taking issue with the note’s mildly patronizing tone, fired back with his own written retort. And as for the yogurts? Yup, still in the fridge.
related: Who’s the smartass?
Tags: Canada · fridge · most popular notes of 2010 · rebuttals · roommates · smartass · yogurt
“My next-door neighbor has some problems with controlling her rage,” says Guy in Austin. So when the apartment manager wouldn’t force her upstairs neighbors to take down their bird feeder — on the grounds that the resulting bird crap from above constituted plant harassment — she wasn’t about to let the issue drop quietly.
Meanwhile, Lucas brings us this report of a uncontrollable botanophile on the loose at his office in Toronto.
Tags: Austin · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · neighbors · rebuttals · smartass · Toronto
Most office fridge notes — especially when they pertain to specialty “diet” items like, say, a Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwich — read something like this one (from a cubicle farm in Burbank, California).
Not so at Rocky‘s office in Austin, Texas…but office drama is never too hard to find in the shared fridge.
Of course, you don’t even have to be a sentient being to fall into a similar trap.
If you’ve shopped online at Amazon.com lately, you might have noticed that they’ve starting suggesting using a custom “PayPhrase” to speed up express checkout. After placing a recent order, Rosalie in Seattle did a double-take when she saw the phrase Amazon picked for her.
related: Sweet & Lowdown
Tags: food · kinda creepy · office fridge · smartass · stealing · WTF?
We can’t all be Banksy, but sometimes all it takes is a small, well-placed bit of vandalism to brighten your day. Take this example from Emily in Philadelphia:
Or this one, spotted by Scott at a certain tech company headquarters in Mountain View, California:
Which leads me to wonder…are there really no smart-mouthed vandals in Portsmouth, New Hampshire (where Ian spotted this sign) ballsy enough to challenge this proclamation from the local ice rink?
related: who’s the smartass?
Tags: oh snap · smartass