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Entries Tagged as 'southern charm'

Wild as a mink but sweet as (broken bottles of) soda pop

March 28th, 2013 · 53 Comments

This interesting counterpoint to yesterday’s “multi-offensive” North Dakota screed was spotted by Amanda in the mountains of good ol’ East Tennessee. It was posted near a rope swing across a river, a popular place for swimming, breaking beer bottles, and, apparently, educating the next generation of foul-mouthed note-writers.

Hey asshole yeah you, you dumb redneck. Instead breaking glass bottles where my kids swim, can't u screw ur cousin instead? They have about the same entertainment value...I'm told. Or do us all a favor & screw a broken bottle. Fukn jerks

related: Roadside Intervention

Tags: small town living · southern charm · spelling and grammar police · Tennessee · that's trashy

Southern Comfort

January 18th, 2009 · 121 Comments

Though the issue might not be top of mind for sophisticated and urbane readership of this website, let this serve as your warning: Should you find yourself in, say, Fayetteville, Arkansas (like Melissa, a California expat currently attending the U of A) you’ll soon realize how important it is to lay down the law with regard to proper cud disposal.

I know that we live in Arkansas, and we like our tobacco, but the water fountain is not a spit cup for you're [sic] chewed tobacco. It is clogging up the drain. Please refrain from using the water fountain for this purpose.

Of course, when you live as far north as Baltimore and notice that your boss has taken to spitting chaw in your trash can, the situation becomes that much more dire.

Spit in my trashcan and I'll take a dump in yours :)

related: evidently, yes

Tags: all-staff e-mail · Arkansas · Baltimore · garbage · southern charm · spelling and grammar police · spitting · your/you're

I can has guilt trip?

April 2nd, 2008 · 112 Comments

Writes Jake in Los Angeles: “At home for Christmas (in Greenville, South Carolina) I mentioned in passing that I would ‘try’ to make it home for Easter, which is what most southern refugee children with guilt complexes tell their doting mothers even though both sides know said child has no intention of showing up to hide eggs and eat ham.”

Jake’s mom, bless her heart, didn’t get the memo.

I am a sad cat wearing bunny ears.

Wish you were coming home but I understand. Love, M

related: Too many

Tags: guilt trip · holiday spirit · Moms & Dads · South Carolina · southern charm