margarita spotted this note in the window of a laundromat in san francisco. honestly, she says, “i’m more afraid of a vindictive, threatening neighbor than a laundry ‘theif.’”

related: no, that’s not the british spelling

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(and much love to robin in sydney!)

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“we really don’t hate the holidays,” says our anonymous foreign-policy elf in washington, d.c., “just passive-aggressive coworkers.”

related: perhaps a committee to assess the health of the committee?

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thanks to sarah for capturing this delicious little slice of life from her christian college in illinois. (delicious like a quart of starbucks coffee almond fudge, not one measly little low-fat frappucino bar.)

related: but He took the wheel

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our anonymous submitter saw this note posted on the door to the walk-in cooler at a convenience store in boerne, texas. “the clerk told me that the red bull delivery person had been drinking red bull and leaving the empty cans on the floor of the walk-in,” our submitter says. “in her words, ‘he was [...]

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casey from shreveport, louisiana spotted this on the coke machine in the office break room. she clarifies: “henry g.’s comment is in reference to the increase in price, not katie’s wanting more coke zero.”

meanwhile, breanna in l.a. saw this baffling note in a liquor store on the corner of hollywood and vine. (“did someone pee [...]

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writes deanne: “because orlando prides itself on being a friendly city, we tend to do most of our dirty work via passive-aggressive notes and signs. this one is from the front door of a tacky tourist shop on international drive. i can get past the reference to ‘plane rude’ but the ‘macdonalds’ analogy is a [...]

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writes tessa, who works at a restaurant in albuquerque: “the day manager left this note for the night cook, who does spend all night smoking, watching TV and calling his girlfriend on the business phone.” (i’m sure this note will absoutley set him straight.)

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lisa in berkeley says she was doing laundry in her dorm building when someone pointed out this amazing note to her. “according to that person, who knew the note-poster through a friend, ‘the towels were actually nice. they were from kohl’s or something.’”

lisa says the note has since been taken down. “i guess an ra [...]

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aarwenn from seattle found this note in her office’s cafeteria, which she says is a hot spot for bad writers with passive-aggressive issues. “of course,” she says, “here at Large Aerospace Company, a lot of us have ‘issues.’”

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this exercise in how not to get a job is brought to us by an anonymous submitter in kansas city. the worst part: before sending this e-mail, this guy was actually in the top five.
(i think steve might have watched in good company one too many times.)

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this delightful note comes to us from the wilds of suburban orange county, california. “there is a door at my school (a private college) that is constantly propped open,” explains amy, a grad student. “up until yesterday, the note on the door said, ‘please close door.’ i have NO idea about the microwave [...]

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those troublemakers requesting more crazy apartment notes can thank our anonymous submitter, a GM at a property management firm in springfield, missouri for today’s masterpiece. “one of our resident managers delivered this letter to 115 units at her property, then e-mailed me a copy because she was REALLY proud of it,” our submitter writes. “i [...]

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when our saga begins, our anonymous submitter’s girlfriend was living in a tiny apartment in sydney, australia. due to space constraints, she was temporarily sleeping on what our submitter admits was “possibly one of the world’s shittiest sofabeds.”

but while the mailbox notes were presumably written first (based on the tone) they weren’t actually discovered until [...]

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our anonymous submitter dutifully passes along this company-wide farewell e-mail, but says: “i have no idea what’s he’s talking about. holla!” (i know, i know, he’s no jason.)

related: the farewell email to end all farewell emails 

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long-simmering roommate issues comes to a head in toronto…
(green ink is being kicked out by black ink.)

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a staff-all email from an anonymous submitter in seattle…

what’s muscle milk, you ask? well, say its makers, “muscle milk is arguably america’s favorite protein.” apparently because unlike, say, chicken, muscle milk comes in flavors like “egg nog,” “chocolate banana crunch” and “root beer float.”
related: try a bite 

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“you know when you drink so much that you can’t remember what you did the night before?” asks our anonymous scottish pizza bandit. “sometimes we’re lucky enough to encounter certain things which trigger memories of our alcohol-fueled rampage. i was lucky enough to come across this the next day.”

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attention: corporate emergency in the chicagoland area!

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this note, from the science library of washington and lee university in lexington, virginia, has a bit of a backstory.
explains our anonymous submitter: “here, you can reserve a carrel for the entire school year, with two students to a carrel. our honor system is such that people leave their books and belongings at their carrel [...]

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