Entries Tagged as 'spelling and grammar police'
As a Valentine’s Day gift to you all, I present you with this epic love story (which Teddie in Minneapolis discovered pinned to the bulletin board in his apartment building).
Teddie’s love note to this love note: “I love that this person (he? she?) used commas, ellipses, and possibly a semicolon, but no periods. I also love how the all-caps rant in the middle segues into a plea to be Myspace friends again with an offhand ‘anyway.’ Also, what happened to her dad?”
Oh, Charles. You are so SUPER ATTRACTIVE I can hardly help myself. Deseray doesn’t know what’s she missing!
related: perfect for each other
Tags: ex drama · Minneapolis/St. Paul · p.s. · runaway run-on sentences · spelling and grammar police · spurned lover · TL;DR · WTF? · xoxo · You call that punctuation?
“Our department head thought we should be be bringing in doughnuts more often,” says our anonymous submitter in Illinois. One of the department’s “severely underpaid” underlings, meanwhile, thought otherwise.
UPDATE: For those of you asking “But where’s the ridiculous clip art?!” I bring you this rather dashing toreador/sheriff (as spotted by Mel in the break room of her Ithaca, New York office).
While Mel doesn’t disagree with the sentiment behind the note, “It’s a bit off-putting to be presumed guilty of theft before the fact,” she says. “Also, there seems to be a degree of randomness to the number of exclamation points at the end of each line.” (And of course, that dandy of a sheriff.)
related: Straight out of the Michael Scott Playbook
Tags: bold underlined italics · bullet points · coffee · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · Illinois · now that's management · office · raging against the machine · rebuttals · spelling and grammar police
Filching someone’s McDonald’s coupons…the “aggressive” flipside of the passive-aggressive offering of coupons for fitness DVDs?
“The person who sent this e-mail is actually a great and very well-liked individual at my place of work,” our submitter says. (Assuming, I guess, that one doesn’t come between him and his Egg McMuffins.)
related: sympathy for the devil
extra credit: Shaking things up at Dairy Queen
Tags: all-staff e-mail · Canada · ellipses-crazed · guilt trip · sarcasm · spelling and grammar police · stealing · thanks (but not really)
The curious note was posted in the women’s bathroom of New Orleans City Hall…leaving many unanswered questions behind.
Mad Libs, anyone?
related: Blame it on Dayton
Tags: CAPS LOCK · malapropisms · New Orleans · spelling and grammar police · toilet
Writes our (only slightly embittered) submitter in Connecticut: “My coworker works the receiving department in a car parts warehouse. Even though he works in a warehouse he likes to pretend he works in an office by sitting at his workstation all day working on ‘problems.’ He put this up because apparently people actually doing work were drowning out his Rush Limbaugh broadcast.”
related: just sayin’
Tags: bold underlined italics · noise · spelling and grammar police
As this note from Columbus, Ohio demonstrates, ’tis the season to be hilariously self-righteous!
related: All I want for Christmas
extra credit: Baby Jesus Theft [Wikipedia]
Roundup of stolen Baby Jesus reports [Wonkette]
Baby Jesus found! [FOUND Magazine]
Tags: Christmas · Columbus · holiday spirit · i before e · Jesus · office fridge · rhetorical question · spelling and grammar police · stealing · TL;DR
Our submitter in Dublin, California was leaving her apartment for work one morning when she found this syntactically-challenged note stuck to the door. “I assume my anonymous complaining neighbor has the wrong apartment number because A) My husband and I do not have children and B) For all but one of the dates listed no one was home to make any noise.”
She adds: ” We do, however, have other neighbors next door who are quite loud, and I’ve often been woken up to the sounds of moans, grunts and something heavy slamming into an adjoining wall.” (You know, just like that part in Big where they play pinball and jump on the trampoline!)
“When my husband saw this he laughed pretty hard and wondered aloud weather ‘kids jumping on the bed‘ was a euphemism for loud sex.”
related: Down and dirty down under (dear)
Tags: California · neighbors · noise · sex sex sex · spelling and grammar police
Exhibit A, as seen by an anonymous submitter in Seattle?
…or exhibit B, as spotted by Mitch in Goldendale, Washington?
related: and god knows what
Tags: CAPS LOCK · comma diarrhea · confusion??? · exclamation-point happy!!!! · guilt trip · karma's a bitch · Seattle · spelling and grammar police · stealing · Washington state
Who needs a water cooler? Nothing fosters “community” like shared networked printers! Need proof?
First up, an anonymous submission from a cubicle farm in Rochester Hills, Michigan. (Not pictured, our submitter says: two additional copies of the same “Pomptly” note to the left and right of the original.)
And from Illinois…
From Omaha, Nebraska…
(And from Brooklyn…and just about everywhere else, from Glastonbury, Connecticut to Geneva, Switzerland.)
Meanwhile, Melissa from San Francisco was recently at the D.C. bureau of a news magazine for a press meeting, but being a devoted PAN-ista, she managed to sneak out of the conference room while the coast was clear to make sure she could capture this shot for us. (So please excuse the blurriness.)
related: this is not positive communication
Tags: note wars · office · oh snap · rebuttals · spelling and grammar police · The Earth · the printer
Kellye from Huntsville, Alabama spotted these notes posted on boarded-up diner during last month’s G20 summit in Pittsburgh.
Explains Kellye: “The broken windows were caused by a few rowdy anarchists/drunk college kids from Oakland who apparently missed the mark in their defiance of the man. Since the vandals represented only a very small cross-section of protesters involved, other more local-friendly civil disobedients apparently saw fit to apologize for in their stead and offer their respectful patronage.”
related: silent protest
Tags: heart · note wars · Pittsburgh · raging against the machine · spelling and grammar police · Starbucks