This bit of poetry is brought to us by Alex in Vancouver, an innocent observer on the scene.
Entries Tagged as 'thanks (but not really)'
July 7th, 2008 · 239 Comments
June 26th, 2008 · 240 Comments
After messing up his back, Clay in Knoxville figured he’d give a chiropractor a shot. But when the doc he saw refused to show him the x-rays he’d taken until after a “seminar” about payment plans — oh, and treatment options — Clay decided to take his aching back elsewhere. A few days later, he got this caring follow-up letter in the mail.
UPDATE: Too good to be true, you say? Clay clarifies: “The reason I didn’t block out the “Woodacre” is that it was wrong — it was wrong on my charts and I pointed it out to the receptionist. One page even had a “verified by” signature on it and ALL my information was wrong. I have no idea how they got the address right on the envelope and wrong on the letterhead (the same as on the paperwork I pointed out to them), but they did.”
related: Happy to be of service
June 12th, 2008 · 116 Comments
Writes an anonymous submitter in Peterborough, Ontario: “This past year, my roommates and I had a stranger rent the extra room in our house, and he turned out to be a socially oblivious slob we spent the entire year picking up after.” As frustrating as the situation was, his roommate Andrew can’t seem to fully distance himself from his inborn Canadian niceness, even in this final send-off.
related: 2 good 2 be 4gotten
May 28th, 2008 · 212 Comments
Spotted by Anna on the wall of an apartment complex in Phoenix…
Meanwhile, in Ottawa…it’s comforting to know that even when Mom isn’t there to do your laundry, she can still help you guilt-trip your neighbors.
May 25th, 2008 · 62 Comments
The word “newsflash,” like the phrase “no offense,” is an early indicator that what follows is probably going to be something pretty bitchy. Unless, of course, you’re watching TV news, in which case the word “newsflash” more likely heralds the announcement of a hard-hitting segment about the household product in your kitchen that could be killing your children. Either way: proceed with caution.
Exhibit a) from roommate to roommate, Chicago
Exhibit b) from mother to daughter, Irving, Texas
Exhibit c) the pointed use of song lyrics in a Facebook status update
Exhibit d) stating the obvious
April 15th, 2008 · 99 Comments
“Not long before I left my previous job writing reviews of video games, I got this little gem from someone involved in the production of a game I didn’t exactly care for,” Alex says. “Game-makers bitching about reviews is nothing new, but rarely do they do it with as much sarcastic flair as this one does.”
March 3rd, 2008 · 96 Comments
The “Thanks for forgetting my birthday, asshole” thank-you note: Because the only thing that would have made this e-mail from Rebecca’s (32-year-old) brother any better is a midi file soundtrack and a dancing elephant or two.
Adds Rebecca: “My resulting apology just yielded more hate-filled e-mails from him — nevermind that I was camping and he lives in another country which I can’t call from my cell phone! I should have taken the advice of another contributor to this site who said there is no correct way to respond to a passive-aggressive note.”
related: two birds with one snowman
January 5th, 2008 · 139 Comments
related: WoW, indeed
December 3rd, 2007 · 69 Comments
Derek and his bandmates in the Grand rapids, Michigan rock/metal band Charles the Osprey were in the middle of a post-set smoke when the club’s bartender came outside, grinning ear-to-ear, and handed them this note.
Unlike the unwilling participants in Improv Rverywhere’s “best gig ever,” Charles the Osprey seem to be taking the attention in stride. Writes Derek: “The funniest part is that she says nothing about the songwriting, which is obviously what she really hated, but rather talks about our lack of talent!”
(Sorry, would-be prank callers: it’s a non-working number.)
November 19th, 2007 · 104 Comments
One loverly lady in Illinois found this note on the door of her dorm room after a long day of classes. (The identity of the note-leaver is still a mystery, as is the meaning of the phrase “dollar sign flower slams easily.”)
Adds our submitter: “When we had our next floor meeting, I did the not-so-passive thing of calling out ‘whoever wrote the note,’ saying that we were trying our hardest to keep her ‘lovely.’”
related: We hear you, man