Entries Tagged as 'tourists'

Vintage Snobs ‘R’ Us

June 23rd, 2010 · 92 Comments

Mark from Liverpool spotted this sign in the window of a vintage clothing store in the center of Rome. Please, someone go take a dump in their fitting room.

No Aliens No Visitors No Stingies No Miserables ONLY BUYERS! ONLY VINTAGE LOVERS! NO TOURIST

Meanwhile, as Tyler and his pals discovered, this vintage store in Madison, Wisconsin is apparently only obnoxious to its actual customers. “The changing rooms were covered in notes,” Tyler says, “and the old woman behind the counter had a continuous look of disdain on her face. It took us a while to realize that was just the way she rested her face.”

Rather than, say, passing judgment on the sizes of their potentially TOO LARGE waists.

STOP. Check the tag. Is it too small? Then don't try it on and please us all!

related: Yo, sweaty beasts!

What does “fashion forward” mean to you?

Tags: "customer service" · attire · blitzkrieg approach · Italy · Madison · tourists

Warnings for the altruistic tourist

June 13th, 2010 · 84 Comments

Juliet from Los Angeles came upon this sign near the summit of a 12-km hike up Turrialba Volcano, in Costa Rica. “As I stared down into giant crater of the active volcano, dotted with sulfur pools, I realized the sign was right. Swimming in those pools probably wasn’t worth the expense.”

It is costly to take an injured or dead person out. Avoid unnecessary expense.

The dryly practical approach seems to be a popular one at tourist locations around the world — especially zoos, such as this one on Langkawi Island:

PLEASE BE SAFE - Do not stand, sit, climb or lean on the fences. If you fall, animals could eat you and that might make them sick. Thank you.

Meanwhile, this resort in the Bahamas adds its own whimsical twist:

PLEASE DO NOT DROP CIGARETTE BUTTS ON THE GROUND. THE FISH COME OUT AT NIGHT TO SMOKE THEM AND WE ARE TRYING TO GET THEM TO QUIT.

related: You don’t need a cell phone to talk to God

Tags: Americans abroad · animal welfare · Bahamas · Costa Rica · Espanol · Malaysia · most popular notes of 2010 · smoking · that's irresponsible · tourists

As Davy Crockett once said…

September 8th, 2008 · 146 Comments

I recently returned from a few days in San Antonio, Texas, where my friend Matt and I amused ourselves on the Riverwalk with a competition to find the tackiest souvenir possible in each store within three minutes or less. (My first win: a “pooping armadillo” keychain.) When we entered this fine establishment, however, I had to call a time-out.

as davy crockett once said...

as davy crockett once said...

as davy crockett once said...

as davy crocket once said...

as davy crockett once said...

as davy crockett once said...

as davy crockett once said...

as davy crockett once said...

as davy crockett once said...

I didn’t even get a chance to take photos of all the signs at this one store — including some amazing ones taped to the register — before I started getting the stink-eye from the manager. (I generally try to stay out of trouble in states that allow their teachers to come to class armed.) I’m telling you, Alamo, Schmalamo: this store was the highlight of my trip.

related: Tourist traps have the best signs

Tags: "customer service" · blitzkrieg approach · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · heart · high on highlighter · San Antonio · Texas · touching · tourists

It’s not food, mister — it’s ice cream!

November 29th, 2007 · 100 Comments

Tourist traps have the best signs. More proof? This exercise in subtlety is from Provincetown, Mass., where it was spotted by intrepid vacationer Teresa from Boise.

Ice cream: apparently no longer a food

Exhibit b) is from Washington, D.C., in a store Sam says sold “all sorts of crap, from Nixon and Michael Jackson pins to African drums and sweaters.”

No Food No Drink No Smoking No Ice Cream

And in Las Vegas, even “the ice cream of the future” doesn’t get a special exemption.

But...it's the ice cream of the future!

Tags: beverages · blitzkrieg approach · Cape Cod · CAPS LOCK · D.C. · food · ice cream · Massachusetts · questionable logic · smoking · tourists