Entries Tagged as 'Detroit'
“My dad has six older, very Italian sisters,” writes Kristina in Detroit, in what sounds very much like the setup for a sitcom. “They’re all very opinionated, and will take a stab at you whenever possible.”
A few weeks ago, she says, “My dad — out of the kindness of his heart — lent a hand by fixing his oldest sister’s virus-riddled computer.” Of course, Aunt Marie was well-warned that wiping her (un-backed-up) hard drive to get rid of the viruses would also erase her other downloaded programs, music and whatnot, but true to form, Aunt Marie wasn’t about to let a good deed go unpunished.
Even in her thank you note, Kristina says, “she just had to mention her ‘programs’ (which have no chance of coming back, and she knows it!)”
related: Best wishes, godless heathens!
Tags: a little patronizing · Detroit · family · signed with love · thanks (but not really)
In a brief moment of silence at a Christmas celebration, 7-year-old Madyson happened to let one rip. “We all laughed and told her to say ‘excuse me,’” says her cousin, Carrie in Detroit, but instead, the mortified girl ran out of the room. A few minutes later, she returned to fling this note in her family’s general direction.
Well, Madyson, you learned a valuable lesson this Christmas: parents are mean. But getting the hell out of Detroit? That’s actually not a bad idea. (Make a break for it now, and that passing of gas could be the best thing you never did!)
related: From the Mixed-Up Files of Joan Jett; When you can’t blame the dog
Tags: a little insensitive · Christmas · Detroit · family · flatulence · kids · p.s.
Trixie found this morally and grammatically curious note pinned to clothesline in her boyfriend’s Detroit neighborhood. So, uh, if you’re looking for a safe house after a prison break…
related: I know where she lives.
Tags: CAPS LOCK · Detroit · stealing · your/you're
Our anonymous submitter in Detroit tells us his roommate is a repeat offender when it comes to passive-aggressive note-leaving. This time around, he went with a note AND a text message. (“And it’s not even my fault!” our submitter protests.)
related: Text me at work if you want to talk!
Tags: and that's an order · blitzkrieg approach · Detroit · kitchen · oven · roommates · text message · that's a fire hazard · turning on/off