Entries Tagged as 'New York'

…and then there’s the glass half-full approach.

February 1st, 2012 · 47 Comments

There’s the typical New York City note…

"Please do not unplug the coffeemaker" "PLEASE DO NOT USE WHIMSICAL FONTS"

And then there’s the Willamette Valley way…

Well, at least it's not Papyrus.

related: Completely valid rebuttals

Tags: Comic Sans Alert · New York · Oregon · smartass

Tony Q69: Never Forget

January 26th, 2012 · 47 Comments

Jen in Astoria takes the Q69 bus to work every morning, so she’s quite familiar with the infamous Tony. “I hadn’t seen them in some time,” she says, until catching a glimpse of this beauty just a few days ago. (“Apparently,” she adds, “the chick is still pissed.”)

Tony Q-69 Tony Q69 Tony Q69 You Tony Q-69, are the only one who should feel guilty and sorry over what happened!!!! You are the Married Man who was only looking to get SEX from me without any strings attached!!! This was your only intentions! You Don’t know how to give a Woman any Real friendship either!!!!! You use Your Q-69 job to flirt with Woman all Day long and everyday! You cannot be trusted and you don’t deserve any attention at all!!!! I won’t forget your famous line how you say that, “Married Man are lonely too”. Then it looks like all you need is a Prostitute Tony!!!! I was not looking for any one night stands with a Married Man fool!!!!  But you are for sure Mr. one-night stand and used many Woman! You Married Men are all Garbage and are worth absolutely nothing!!!! What Woman needs a Married Man? I am a single woman and I deserve a trusting, loyal,Sincere, Man in my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Astoria…

Tony Q69

related: The Tale of Tony Q-69

Tags: blitzkrieg approach · ex drama · public shaming · public transit · Queens

Do I detect a note of hostility in your hospitality?

December 1st, 2011 · 77 Comments

As someone with a small bladder, Becky of Apostrophe Catastrophes says she’s peed in many a hotel lobby bathroom, but this was the first time she’s encountered a passive-aggressive note in the process.

“Ironically,” she says, on this occasion, “I actually was staying in one of the rooms they hint at in the note.”

There's [sic] 1,015 other bathrooms just waiting for you upstairs.

related: The best bathrooms in Fairbanks, Alaska

Tags: bathroom · motels & hostels · New York

Hover & Flow(chart)

November 15th, 2011 · 131 Comments

Writes Erica in New York: “I don’t think this woman is aware that the aggressive automatic flush makes water splash all over the toilet seats…but she’s obviously very angry.”

When you pee, do you squat and hover over the toilet seat?

related: Coffee pot flowchart

Tags: etiquette · flow chart · most popular notes of 2011 · New York · office · piss · toilet

While My Magnadoodle Gently Weeps

October 25th, 2011 · 64 Comments

Dave‘s eight-year-old daughter is a huge of the Beatles…and at this moment, a not-so-huge fan of her father.

I wish cute George Harrison was my Daddy instead of you!

Dave, perhaps in a few years she’ll appreciate that, if nothing else, at least you spared her the unibrow gene?

related: Abbey Road idiots

extra credit:
passive aggressive notes to your toddler via magnadoodle

Tags: Father-daughter notes · kids · most popular notes of 2011 · New York

Perhaps your boss is due for a little chat with HR?

September 28th, 2011 · 31 Comments

The sign to the left was posted by the boss at an office in Oneonta, New York. (Adds our submitter: “He claims the spelling was autocorrected by Word.”)

Without even getting into the finer points of what might constitute a “hostile work environment,” I think it’s safe to say that encouraging your employees to commit suicide isn’t the best management technique.

IF YOU ARE NOT INTELLEGENT [sic] ENOUGH TO RINSE OUT THE EMPTIES, PLEASE KILL YOURSELF NOW.  [response:] What about not being able to spell

(Of course, some managers might disagree.)

You don't call retarded people retards. You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded.

related: Signs you might be stuck in a soul-sucking job

Tags: a little insensitive · crazy boss · die bitch die · more aggressive than passive · New York · now that's management · rebuttals · recycling · spelling and grammar police · that's irresponsible

Playing the terrorism card to justify your late-night karaoke dance party? Really?

September 25th, 2011 · 58 Comments

If it wasn’t obvious, Lorah in NYC says the response note here was most definitely a total lie. (The residents of 4B are musical theater actors, and sing-and-dance-a-thons are not uncommon events in their apartment.)

Please respect your neighbors. Any singing/dancing/noise after 11pm, management & police will be notified. -The Tenants

So sorry for all the commotion last night. We meant no disrespect by singing/dancing. A dear friend returned from overseas, fighting the war on terror. We had a celebration for his return. It would be a shame if you do not support our soldiers overseas. Please come see our apartment. It's red, white, and blue. NOW WHO'S THE TERRORIST?! <3 the residents of 4B xoxoxo

related: If you don’t read this, the terrorists win! Do you hate America?

Tags: heart · neighbors · New York · noise · non-apology apology · oh no you didn't · smartass · that's disrespectful · xoxo

Hello Kitty says: “Unconditional love can be complicated!”

September 23rd, 2011 · 59 Comments

Melody in Schenectady, New York says her 7-year-old daughter, Emma, is constantly writing little stories and whatnot, which inevitably end up all over the house. As Melody was picking up some of Emma’s latest scraps, she found this note addressed to her 4-year-old sister.

Hay Addison, I thingk you sud be niser to me i still love y(ou) but your driv me crase. Love, Emma

related: S is for sibling rivalry

Tags: kids · New York · siblings · signed with love

Couplets for the Commode

September 13th, 2011 · 44 Comments

You might think that the writer of nearly a dozen couplets on toilet etiquette would include at least one variation on the sprinkle/tinkle theme, but apparently the poet at work in this Nassau County government building doesn’t go for in that sort of cliché.

But wouldn’t you know it? As Nicole from New York City reports, “The toilet seat in question was covered in ‘sprinkle‘ and absolutely disgusting.”

When you are done and it's time to flush/Please be kind and do not rush. Just look behind you and be aware/That if you can see it, it's really still there. Please flush again and maybe once more/You are really mean if you walk out that door. You share this room with other women/Who don't need to see your deposit swimmin'. Just one more thought before you go/To wash your hands, but that you know. If you don't wash those germs away/Don't touch your food or face today. It's such a shame to write this note/To people old enough to vote. In other words, please be considerate of everyone sharing this room with you. Let's keep it clean. Don't be mean! Thanks!!

When you are done and it's time to flush/Please be kind and do not rush. Just look behind you and be aware/That if you can see it, it's really still there. Please flush again and maybe once more/You are really mean if you walk out that door. You share this room with other women/Who don't need to see your deposit swimmin'. Just one more thought before you go/To wash your hands, but that you know. If you don't wash those germs away/Don't touch your food or face today. It's such a shame to write this note/To people old enough to vote. In other words, please be considerate of everyone sharing this room with you. Let's keep it clean. Don't be mean! Thanks!!

related: Toilet Paper Poetry Slam

Tags: etiquette · hygiene · Long Island · New York · pure poetry · toilet · washing your hands

 
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