Entries Tagged as 'Queens'

Tony Q69: Never Forget

January 26th, 2012 · 48 Comments

Jen in Astoria takes the Q69 bus to work every morning, so she’s quite familiar with the infamous Tony. “I hadn’t seen them in some time,” she says, until catching a glimpse of this beauty just a few days ago. (“Apparently,” she adds, “the chick is still pissed.”)

Tony Q-69 Tony Q69 Tony Q69 You Tony Q-69, are the only one who should feel guilty and sorry over what happened!!!! You are the Married Man who was only looking to get SEX from me without any strings attached!!! This was your only intentions! You Don’t know how to give a Woman any Real friendship either!!!!! You use Your Q-69 job to flirt with Woman all Day long and everyday! You cannot be trusted and you don’t deserve any attention at all!!!! I won’t forget your famous line how you say that, “Married Man are lonely too”. Then it looks like all you need is a Prostitute Tony!!!! I was not looking for any one night stands with a Married Man fool!!!! But you are for sure Mr. one-night stand and used many Woman! You Married Men are all Garbage and are worth absolutely nothing!!!! What Woman needs a Married Man? I am a single woman and I deserve a trusting, loyal,Sincere, Man in my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Astoria…

Tony Q69

related: The Tale of Tony Q-69

Tags: blitzkrieg approach · ex drama · public shaming · public transit · Queens

The tale of Tony Q69

July 26th, 2011 · 77 Comments

Janine in Astoria was at a stoplight next to a Q69 bus stop in Queens when she noticed signs reading “TONY Q69″ taped all over the outside and inside of the bus shelter. “I made my boyfriend pull over so I could read it,” she says — and got a photo, so she could share Tony Q69′s shameful story with the rest of the world.

TONY Q69. YOU TONY are the only one who should feel sorry over what happened!! YOU ARE THE MARRIED MAN who was only looking to get sex from me without any strings attached!! You don't know how to give a woman REAL attention, or to call, or to have a real friendship because this is not your intentions to do so! You also use your Q-69 JOB to flirt with all the woman every day!! You are also a smooth talker & a flirt on the phone! And how dare you blame me for anything, especially for wanting attention! I am a single woman & deserve a trusting man in my life!

UPDATE: Greg in Astoria has spotted another note to Tony Q69…

TONY Q69: You Tony, are the only one who should feel guilt over what happened!!! You are the married man who was looking to get sex from me without any strings attached! You can't give a woman real attention or call her to have a real friendship because this was not your true intentions! You were looking for sex period! And you use your job to flirt with women all day on the Q69!!!

As has Adam…

TONY Q69: You Tony are the only one who should feel guilty and sorry over what happened! You are the married man who was looking to get some from a woman!!! Your agenda was to have SEX with no strings attached!!! You can't give what a woman needs which is attention, to be called + to have a real friendship/relationship!!!!!! You were out to satisfy yourself period and then walk away like they all do!! And how dare you blame me for anything especially for wanting attention! How Could You!

And Rebecca!

TONY Q69. YOU TONY are the only one who should feel sorry over what happened!! YOU ARE THE MARRIED MAN who was only looking to get sex from me without any strings attached!!

UPDATE: The Tony Q-69 Saga Continues!

Tags: ex drama · excessive capitalization · exclamation-point happy!!!! · public shaming · public transit · Queens

Toto, I have a feeling we’re not at band camp anymore

October 20th, 2010 · 126 Comments

Michael is a music teacher in New York, and one of his students, Aleks, a clarinet player with 15 years experience, recently moved to the city to start his master’s degree. “Coming from Ohio, he had no idea what he was getting into when practicing clarinet in his apartment in Queens,” says Michael. “Now he knows.”

Dear Friend, Take take the flute and shove it up your ass. You have NO talent. Give your neighbors a break. if not we are going to break your hand's [sic]

related: Buskers & broomsticks

Tags: apostrophe catastrophe · CAPS LOCK · excessive underlining · most popular notes of 2010 · music · neighbors · noise · not-so-veiled threats · Queens

Toilet Paper Poetry Slam

September 20th, 2010 · 46 Comments

Which is your favorite ode to replacing the roll?

Entry #1, from Baltimore?

Toilet Paper Haiku: Quietly I sit. Waiting silently. Drip dry. The roll is missing.

Entry #2, from New Orleans?

THE TOILET PAPER THEIF [sic]: The toilet paper theif [sic] is at it again! This is so frustrating I don't know where to begin...You would think that for people so grown...That they would not steal toilet paper for reasons unknown...It is always the brand new roll and never the old...Also, the can of Lysol disappeared, or so I was told... My plea is simple, please do not disregard...Stop stealing the toilet paper you Fucking Retard!!

or Entry #3, from Long Island City?

DOUCHE!

related: Scatological poetry slam

Tags: Baltimore · bathroom · ellipses-crazed · excessive capitalization · New Orleans · pure poetry · Queens · spelling and grammar police · toilet paper

Is this chicken, what just hit me in the head, or is this fish?

March 12th, 2010 · 64 Comments

This week’s “WTF? Friday” contribution comes from Carey in Brooklyn, who spotted this warning taped to a telephone pole at a busy intersection in Long Island City, Queens. “I looked around carefully,” Carey says, “but there were no flying missiles to be seen.”

WARNING: Cans of tuna fish are being thrown out of windows on this corner. This is not a joke. Cans of tuna fish are being thrown out of windows on this corner. This is not a joke. A can of tuna fish was launched at a friend and I as we stood on the corner of 47th Avenue and 11th Street. Be careful you don't get hit in the head by one of these mysteriously flying cans! The culprit is a little coward, so keep your eyes open.

related: Passive-allergic

Tags: New York · Queens · visual aids · warning · WTF?

Movin’ Out (Anthony’s Song)

August 14th, 2007 · 202 Comments

Mary saw this collection of missives while visiting friends in Long Island City, Queens last spring.

movin' out (anthony's song)

Anthony left a note on the door…

left a note on the door

Saving his pennies for someday…

savin' his pennies for someday

You oughta know by now

You oughta know by now

Workin’ too hard can give you a heart attackackackackackack

working too hard can give you a heart attackackackackackack

And it seems such a waste of time

You should never argue with a crazy mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mind

You should never argue with a crazy mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mind

And it seems such a waste of time

But she’s not movin’ out.

You can pay Uncle Sam with the overtime

Tags: landlords and property managers · money · more aggressive than passive · more like crazy · most popular notes of 2007 · moving/not moving · Queens · questionable logic · rebuttals · spelling and grammar police