Entries Tagged as 'North Carolina'

A bitter pill to swallow

December 17th, 2009 · 123 Comments

“To the best of our knowledge,” writes our submitter from Raleigh, North Carolina, “the bottle in question is one of those $0.79 plastic Deer Park water bottles.” You know, the special kind carried in just about every gas station, 7-11, and grocery store in the state.

To the one who tossed my bottles while I was on vacation - Shame on You! The small bottle I used to dissolve my medical pills after lunch. Today I could not take them because my bottle was gone.

Moral of the story? Just another example of how taking it upon yourself to clean out the ol’ office fridge can OMG KILL PEOPLE.

related: Your BBQ = 9/11

Tags: cry me a freaking river · guilt trip · North Carolina · office fridge

P.S. You’re not invited to my birthday party, either!

October 16th, 2009 · 215 Comments

Brett in Raleigh, North Carolina had to move out at the end of last semester after his lease ran out, and while he didn’t want to have to resort to a finding a random Craigslist roommate, that ended up being the case.

Brett’s mea culpa: “Being a grad student, I am not home much and have responsibilities to take care of on campus, but obviously some of my other responsibilities were being overlooked at home.” (Lucia, by the way, is the name of his cat.)

passiveaggressivenotes.com - survivor: craigslist roommates edition

on passiveaggressivenotes.com: page 2 of i'm not here to make friends

related: i can hear everything

extra credit: “i’m not here to make friends” reality show mashup [youtube]

Tags: college life · North Carolina · roommates

One can only hope you won’t be giving the wedding toast

June 28th, 2009 · 85 Comments

At a recent wedding that Allison in Ealeigh, N.C. attended, the bride asked that, instead of signing a guestbook, wedding guests write their wishes for the couple on fabric squares that would later be made into a memory quilt. When Allison saw this one sitting on top, she couldn’t resist snapping a photo.

One can only hope you saved yourself for your wedding night

related: Taboo, the game of unsolicited douchebaggery

Tags: love & marriage · North Carolina · sex sex sex · unsolicited feedback

And those Cheetos were my baby’s yellow dye #6

June 26th, 2009 · 90 Comments

This all-staff e-mail is like a fetus-sized version of one of my favorite self-righteous masterpieces. (How this one got buried in my inbox for so long, I have no idea.)

It comes to us courtesy of Jennifer in Chapel Hill, N.C., who notes: “In this instance, ‘local users,’ is everyone in our corporate HQ — including the president, vice presidents, directors, legal counsel, etc., who don’t typically utilize the refrigerator in the staff break room.”

You are welcome!

related: It must have been a pretty big bite

extra credit: STFU, Parents

 

Tags: all-staff e-mail · Moms & Dads · North Carolina · office · office fridge · preggers · runaway run-on sentences · stealing · yogurt

Is your babysitter trying to get in your kid’s pants?

May 15th, 2009 · 337 Comments

So, I pretty much have a policy of not posting notes submitted by the people who wrote them. I made an exception for this one because I think the really passive-aggressive part of the story is the behavior that inspired it. You might disagree. Nonetheless — on to the backstory, from an anonymous dad in Cary, North Carolina:

My daughter attends a friend’s house for child care two days a week.  For the past few days, the lady watching her has been checking my daughter’s clothing tags and telling her she needs to wear “the size of her age.” (“Since you’re 4 years old, you need to wear size 4,” etc.)  This person has never said anything to me or her mother — just the child.

This was making my daughter worry unnecessarily about her clothes, so I decided to step in. When I asked my daughter if she had her tags checked that day, she said yes — but we’ve never had another incident of tag-checking since.

NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

related: you’re toast

Tags: Moms & Dads · MYOB · North Carolina

I’m calling your bluff on this one, Mom

March 4th, 2009 · 78 Comments

Amy spotted this attached to a mailbox in Monroe, North Carolina. Writes amy:  “I have no idea which flower it was (there were many that were still left on the porch), but I was impressed by the effort the victim took with this note — it was written on poster board and left up for quite a few days.”

To the person who STOLE my flower...It was a birthday gift from my little girl, paid for with her own money. I hope you're enjoying it as much as I did... (I would have it it to you if you had asked.) :(

(And the posterboard…was a birthday gift…purchased with her own money!!!)

related: “no” questions asked

Tags: birthday · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · guilt trip · martyr complex · Moms & Dads · North Carolina · sad face · stealing

To have and to hold

March 2nd, 2009 · 104 Comments

To be honest, I find this note — from an anonymous submitter in Raleigh, N.C.. — to be kind of depressing. So let me just say this: if you’ve recently broken up with a significant other and have been thinking, “Hmm, maybe a heartfelt note is the way to win him/her back!” — JUST. SAY. NO.

Anyway, our submitter writes: “When my husband unpacked his belongings from his ex-wife’s house, he kept finding little ‘surprises.’ For example, although they did not go to high school together, she had signed his senior yearbook, and little notes and reproductions of wedding pictures were stuck in books and in pockets of his clothes. Our favorite was this note we found in his camera case.”

Never to be Replaced! Always #1 Your one and only Wife #1 To have and to hold

(Yes, yes, it looks like “to have anal to hold.”)

related: some dating advice

Tags: crazypants · ex drama · North Carolina

“That’s what she said”

November 18th, 2008 · 201 Comments

Spotted by Randi in Charlotte, North Carolina, this one’s straight out of the Michael Scott playbook.

Do not forget to say hello to our special employee of the month Janet G. She may be slow, but she trys.

related: to the victor goes the bile

Tags: faint praise · most popular notes of 2008 · North Carolina · now that's management · oh no you didn't · spelling and grammar police

“It wasn’t me”

May 13th, 2008 · 93 Comments

As far as post-coital “littering” goes, I’m guessing most dorm bathrooms have seen a lot worse than a pink t-shirt, no?

While we certainly appreciate the fact that you got laid last night, we don't appreciate your girlfriend's clothes on the bathroom floor. Please keep littering to a minimum.Thanks, Everyone Else Who Uses This Bathroom

(And we certainly appreciate Matt in Greensboro for snapping the photo.)

related: Humbleshag-brag

Tags: bathroom · college life · double-entendre alert · Greensboro · on behalf of everyone · sex sex sex

When nature calls

January 2nd, 2008 · 128 Comments

I thought it was pretty crazy when Jessie sent in this sign from a thrift store in Wilmington, North Carolina a few months years back…

PLEASE DO NOT USE DRESSING ROOMS AS A RESTROOM IN CASE OF AN EMERGENCY ASK FOR MANAGER. No utilice por favor los cuartos de preparacion como banos. En caso de que una emergencia, pida encargado.

Then Ashley sent in this eerily similar note from a thrift store in Barnegat, New Jersey. “The first time I noticed it, there was only one note,” Ashley says. “Weeks later, when I came back to photograph it, they had added a second. Obviously, just the one note on the door wasn’t getting the point across. How do they know that the perp doesn’t only speaks French? That could be the reason for the recurring problem.”

This is NOT a restroom. If you have an urgent necessary JUST ASK. You can use our restroom.

And still, it continues!

Alice saw one at a thrift store in Tennessee…

When I catch the low life piece of trash (And I will) using my dressing room to urineate in, instead of the bathroom, I will have you arrested. You are a vile, disgusting person and if you don't like this message, Come See Me! Owner Mangr

Caity in New Orleans spotted another at Goodwill in Covington, Louisiana…

THIS IS NOT A RESTROOM.  Ask cashier for directions to restroom.  DO NOT use fitting room to use for restroom.  Management

And now this, from Stephanie in Wichita, Kansas. Says Stephanie: “For years at our neighborhood DAV thrift store there’s been a dressing room that has smelled like pee. Turns out we weren’t imagining it!”

Please Don't Use Our Dressing Rooms As A Bathroom....Thank You

Seriously, what is it about thrift store fitting rooms?

related: This is why your postal worker is disgruntled

Tags: Kansas · Louisiana · New Jersey · North Carolina · piss · retail hell · shit · Tennessee · that's disgusting · Wilmington · WTF?