Entries Tagged as 'Portland'

Law & Order: Special Dishes Unit

November 16th, 2008 · 114 Comments

“These are the results of your typical no-one-washes-their-dishes-at-the-office situation,” says our submitter in Portland, Oregon.”There used to be a note above the sink that said “NOT YOUR MAMA,” but it was replaced with these gems, both of which sort of creep me out (and neither of which has ameliorated the dirty dish issue).”

Do your dishes - It's the Law!

I didn't get out of bed and go to work just to clean up after you princess!!!   I promise I will do all of my dishes here at [redacted] as soon as I finish eating!

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Oregon

Tags: dishes · kinda creepy · office · office cop · Portland

Three things your health teacher didn’t tell you about herpes

June 18th, 2008 · 109 Comments

(A Passiveaggressivenotes.com public disservice announcement)

1. From Portland, Oregon…

FYI - a recent study at Harvard Medical School linked a rare, disfiguring and painful form of genital herpes to leaving dirty dishes in the sink. Be careful out there.

2. From Williamsburg, Virginia…

Stealing ice cream gives you herpes. :)

3. From Miami, Florida…

Surgeon's General Warning Entering Starbucks now greatly increases your chance of contracting herpes.

related: Come get some

extra credit: Herpes: it’s got New York by the balls [nymag.com]

Tags: college life · FYI · Miami · not-so-veiled threats · now that's not true · Portland · roommates · smiley · Starbucks · stealing · Virginia · warning · whiteboard · Williamsburg

The overly friendly coworker: ruining your day since you held the elevator for her that one time

April 21st, 2008 · 137 Comments

Homero in Portland had just finished heating up his lunch in the office microwave when he returned to his desk to find this “helpful” note — attached to an ad from the local alt-weekly — waiting on his chair. Though it’s unsigned, he says he’s pretty sure he knows which coworker left it for him. “She’s kind of socially stunted, but seems to think that a) she’s very funny and b) we’re BFF,” Homero says. “Um…no.”

I saw this ad and thought u might find his services helpful :P

related: WoW, indeed

Tags: "helpful" advice · office · Portland · smiley

WoW, indeed.

November 22nd, 2007 · 64 Comments

You might think a hermit-like Warcraft addict would make the ideal roommate (no noisy sex, no hogging the remote…) but as this little piece of passive-aggressive gold demonstrates, there are some other issues to contend with. Like, say, the stench.

While I am happy for you, in that you have found new "friends" by play[ing] World of Warcraft, I am concerned

(From an anonymous submitter in Portland, Oregon.)

related: Let me help you out

Tags: "helpful" advice · CAPS LOCK · gaming · get a life · hygiene · odor · Portland · roommates

Sophisticated dryers use silverware when they eat your socks

September 19th, 2007 · 151 Comments

Our anonymous submitter spotted this note on a resident’s door in an apartment complex in Portland, oregon. Oddly, she says, this resident lives alone.
Now I realize that you may have temporarily lost your conscious sense of things, however, please return my socks and my large spoon with the silver end. Thank you

Meanwhile, James’s roommate found in the laundry room of his Sacramento apartment complex.

Thank you got taking (stealing) my towel and dryer sheets! Because of YOU I will never feel comfortable doing my laundry - I don't know if you are going to steal my clothes. YOU SUCK.

Tags: excessive underlining · laundry · neighbors · Portland · Sacramento · spoons · stealing · thanks (but not really)

Dear Vandal

September 13th, 2007 · 169 Comments

“Random people seem to have a lot of fun vandalizing Portland’s many bus stops,” says Kathryn. “Several of the stops I use frequently have had their schedules removed, which is oh-so-helpful. The other day when I went to the stop in front of my office to go home, I noticed this little note. They even took the time to laminate it!”

Dear Vandal, It's not my fault that Mommy didn't love you, and I never touched your pee-pee as a child. Why take your anger out on my bus schedule? Kill yourself. It's cooler.

Tags: die bitch die · Portland · rhetorical question · vandalism