Entries Tagged as 'United States'

Switch to tea

May 31st, 2007 · 9 Comments

This note is like the teenager who manages to contain themselves long enough to grudgingly recite a lengthy mandated apology, but then can’t resist turning around and giving the finger afterwards…or the perky flight attendant who finally cracks when the drunk fat guy hits the call button again at the end of a long flight. Mmm, feel the repressed rage!

Coffee Etiquette: Please be courteous to your fellow employees. If you drain a pot or leave very little left, make a new pot. Don't simply turn off the burner and walk away. If there is less than a full pot between the 2, pour one into another and make a fresh pot. It only takes 30 seconds to put the coffee into a filter and push a button. If that is too difficult, maybe you should switch to tea.

(Thanks to Jenn in Hudson, Ohio for submitting!)

RELATED:

Rage against the coffee machine

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · coffee · etiquette · office · Ohio

Visual aids always help

May 30th, 2007 · 18 Comments

From Lars in San Francisco.

Please get yourself a pair of slippers so the person downstairs from you could get some sleep. Try to lift the chair, not dragging it.

Tags: neighbors · noise · San Francisco · sleeping · visual aids

Boston: a place for friends

May 30th, 2007 · 39 Comments

In her defense, Eeka says there were three to four empty spaces available in front of her house when this note was left — two of which she shoveled out herself.

YOUR [sic] PARKED IN MYSPACE!

Tags: Boston · excessive underlining · parking · spelling and grammar police · your/you're

Yeah, I got fired…but that Hot Pocket sure was worth it.

May 30th, 2007 · 14 Comments

This exercise in redundancy is brought to us by Erika in Los Angeles. It’s like the note-writer couldn’t decide which tactic would be most effective and just opted for all of the above.

REMEMBER!

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · excessive underlining · food · guilt trip · high on highlighter · Los Angeles · not-so-veiled threats · office · office fridge · pleasantries as afterthought · spelling and grammar police · stealing

Killing you with cuteness

May 30th, 2007 · 25 Comments

Michele in Jasper, Indiana says she doesn’t actually expect to see her digital camera again, “but I at least wanted to inflict some guilt on the person who took it.”

If you are the person who stole my digital camera, I hope you enjoy the pictures of my little girl; her name is Ella. Also, you left the USB cable - you're going to need it.

Tags: guilt trip · Indiana · office · stealing

Four legs good, two legs bad

May 29th, 2007 · 33 Comments

After reading apt. 10′s response, I can’t help but side with the defendant — especially after Melissa in Omaha revealed that this particular neighbor posts notes like this quite frequently. Because really, that shit is disrespectful.

Dear Lazy Filth Pigs in #10, Since your little boy is too small to get bags into the dumpster, we now have a bag of your trash, diapers and all, lying spread on the ground in front of the dumpster. Not like anybody in this building has any hope that you will, but would you clean up you garbage?

OK first of all I did not now [sic] that. That had happen my son did not tell me.

Tags: garbage · more aggressive than passive · neighbors · oh snap · Omaha · p.s. · rebuttals · spelling and grammar police

Gentrification is insanit(ar)y

May 28th, 2007 · 21 Comments

This sign (spotted by Seamus in Noe Valley, San Fran) is sort of a West-Coast version of this, no?

Liberal loonies take notice. Please do not spit on my windows because your liberal looney views are different than mine. It is not the American way, also it is insanitary [sic] to spread your radical germs in Looney Valley.

Tags: California · crazypants · excessive underlining · more aggressive than passive · more like crazy · politics · San Francisco · spitting

You left evidence.

May 28th, 2007 · 19 Comments

Don’t be fooled by the smiley: this is the kind of note that really throws you off balance. (It’s been more than a month since she received this note, and Kiki from Boston says she’s still shaking in her boots a little.)

Hey You! Look — I know you ate some of my Smart Balance. You left evidence. Stealing is rude! Next time — ask. I'm ok with sharing y'know. :) Amy

related: I Can’t Believe It’s Not (My) Butter

Tags: Boston · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · office · office fridge · smiley · stealing

Microwaves for Dummies

May 27th, 2007 · 7 Comments

I agree with Katrina in Ann Arbor, Michigan — the last  ”…etc.” bullet point is what makes the sign totally genius. And, apparently, effective.

Katrina adds, “Our microwave is a pristine fucking sanctum suitable for storing, say, the Dead Sea Scrolls, so maybe people are leaving the shrink wrap on their Lean Cuisines.”

REASONS YOU SHOULD NOT USE THIS MICROWAVE

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · cleaning · Michigan · microwave · odor · office

CARE: it makes a difference

May 25th, 2007 · 21 Comments

This girl is like the archetypal freshman roommate, no?

I'm sick & tired of leaving nice little notes

From Megan in Charleston, who was not the slob that this note might suggest.

Tags: college life · dishes · excessive underlining · garbage · not-so-veiled threats · rhetorical question · roommates · South Carolina · whiteboard