I’ll start with the moral of the story first: “It just goes to show you that passive aggressive notes are funny but not effective.” That observation comes courtesy of Janell in San Francisco, who admits that she penned the following note after her third coffee mug went missing from the office kitchen.

Explains Janell: “While a lot of people commented on the note, my mug never appeared. After six months passed, my boss bought me an identical mug just so I would take the note down. A year later, one of my co-workers quit. We found the mug in his office.”

related: Justice, with a side of fries

extra credit: The Anti-Theft “Plug Mug”

This is not a passive-aggressive note, this is not a joke — this is a public service announcement, brought to us by Sarah in Seattle.

(No, it’s not as crazy as this, but darn, those tomatoes are cute.)

related: To the tomato thief: YOU WIN

extra credit: Tomato thief, busted

Travis in Minnesota says this note was dropped in his mailbox by some anonymous neighbor who had apparently been fixated on watching him build his backyard deck.

“I was surprised that anyone noticed, let alone went through the trouble to write a full-page complaint,” Travis says. “However, he’s right in that, as one person working on the occasional free night and on weekends, it did take me a full year to complete the project.”

Adds Travis: “I think the strangest part of the note is the challenge to my masculinity. I’m glad that someone finally told me that it’s more manly to pay for someone to do a job for you than to do it yourself. Here I was, all this time, thinking it was just the opposite. Boy, is my face red!”

P.S. If you’re curious, here’s a photo of the deck. I think it’s quite nice.

related: (Don’t Fear) The Creeper

Writes Karin in Michigan: “I found this note taped on the window above the sink after I left a cup on the counter rather than putting it in the dishwasher. I guess my dad thought this approach would be easier than yelling.”

related: The Wrath of the Ancients

extra credit: This is how my son does the dishes [youtube.com]

Recognizing its greatness, Kori in San Diego says her neighbor had this letter framed; it’s now held a place of honor in the garage for more than a decade.

(Just click the photo to enlarge.)

related: Some advice on holding a Garage Sale

Visiting her friend’s apartment for the first time, Kristin in New York City couldn’t help but notice that the entryway was completely covered with ALL CAPS notes from the building’s landlord. Among her favorites was this meta-monstrosity.

Says Kristin: “I love how his tone is over-the-top aggressive, but his actual threat isn’t that scary, given that, as far as I could tell, he’s the only one putting up signs.”

Another of Kristin’s favorites was this one, about water usage. “I’m not sure how overuse of water in New York impacts people in Haiti, but OK!”

related: Love, the Landlord

These two different approaches to the same problem were submitted within minutes of each other.

Exhibit a) From Hipsterville, Brooklyn, Like a Sir, as spotted by Kaitlin:

Exhibit b) From Niceville, Minnesota, Killing you with Kindness, as spotted by Bitsy:

related: All the news that’s fit to steal

This Sunday’s scatological sermon comes to us from Heather in Denver, Colorado:

With a special reading from Lisa in Houston, Texas:

related: A nasty twist on “Man bites Dog”