Entries Tagged as 'United States'

Get Rich or Die Tryin’

March 14th, 2013 · 49 Comments

Ashley spotted this notice in the community room at her grandma’s senior living community in Minnesota. Says Ashley: “Apparently acting like a grown up is still hard when you’re over 80.”

Concerning Bingo Days: Many of you have come into my office complaining about each other from people yelling or giving orders or how many cards you should be able to have or coming in late! I will address the yelling and being disrespectful first. Everyone here is adults. There should be no reason why you can't be respectful to each other. Please try and refrain from opening your mouth and making it miserable for the people that are down here playing for fun and enjoyment! Next how many cards can I have? Well that's easy too. You can have as many that you can handle without infringing on your fellow players. So that means if you can't keep up and have to keep asking them to repeat the number then guess what? you have too many cards. Or if you take too many that there are not enough for everyone than guess what? You have too many cards. And third but not least please respect your fellow players and try to be down stairs and in your seat by 1:30. Remember Bingo is fun not to try and get rich or cut throat your neighbor. It's to get out of your apartment and see your neighbor and visit and enjoy the game. Enough said! Try acting like grown ups and set an example for each other. Thank you. Manager

related: The Rules for Strip Bingo

Tags: Minnesota · most popular notes of 2013 · old folks · spelling and grammar police · that's disrespectful

Anarchy in the Pre-K

March 13th, 2013 · 101 Comments

Our submitter in Washington, D.C. says that a parent recently sent this e-mail to her daughter’s preschool teacher…and cc’d it to the parents of every kid in the class. “Clearly, she thinks her kids are getting screwed out of their God-given right to show-and-tell,” our submitter marvels. “I wouldn’t want to mess with this woman come college application time!”

I have a question about show & tell. How many items are the children supposed to bring? It was always my understanding that each child brought one thing to

related: Pre-K parent public shaming

Tags: D.C. · Moms & Dads · schools & teachers

Well, that was a missed opportunity.

March 11th, 2013 · 18 Comments

Forget Tupperware parties — who could resist a Nasty Crap Container™?

This refrigerator will be cleaned out on Friday March 8th Please take the time to remove your items prior to the 8th. I will have an ice chest to put your lunch bags in. On Monday March 11th I will have a food container sale. Please visit my web page www.nastycrapcontainers.com

related: Don’t be such a miserable sod

extra credit: Fred and Friends “Bug Bags” Lunch Bags

Tags: office fridge · Seattle

You’ve (still) got mail!

March 6th, 2013 · 55 Comments

We’ve received another report from our Back Bay informant, and it seems the stalemate with the tenant in 2D continues!

2d: The extreme pressure on the glue on the postal envelopes & fliers in your densely packed mailbox has reached .017421 isobars, which, in a few days, if not relieved by EMPTYING the box, will result in a horrible BRACKRAKATOA explosion here in the Bay, enough so that even the legions of beggars on Boylston  & Dartmouth streets will have to evacuate, so please empty the box. Thank you. Sincerely, Stephen Hawing. United States Postal Scientist, USPS. P.S. and If you could empty the box every month or so it would be appreciated.

related: You’ve got mail!

Tags: Boston · going postal · public shaming · smartass

Why do you ruin each day of my life?

March 5th, 2013 · 48 Comments

Belinda in Tennessee says her six-year-old daughter wrote this note “after I refused to let her try to glue a bouncy ball back onto the elastic of the paddle toy it had broken off of.”

Mom (sigh) I really love you but why do you ruin each day of my life. I'll be on the front porch if you want to talk with me.

Translation (for those who don’t speak six-year-old):
Mom (sigh) I really love you but why do you ruin each day of my life. I’ll be on the front porch if you want to talk with me.

Meanwhile, redditor thinkboxutah’s 7-year-old son put this together after getting grounded.

I hate my life

related: Just…poop.

Tags: kids · most popular notes of 2013 · Mother-daughter notes · Tennessee

Señor Tapatío gets told.

March 3rd, 2013 · 47 Comments

Writes Randahl in Boise, Idaho: “I love me some Tapatío, and sometimes I forget to put it back in the fridge. My wife thought Mr. Tapatío should know his place.”

Mr. Tapatío

Dear Mr Tapatio, I hate your face. No matter how many times I put you back in the fridge you always reappear on the counter, kitchen table, dining table. You sir, are the herpes of my life. <3 Nicole XXOO

related: Eat it; love it. Got it?

Tags: fridge · heart · Idaho · love & marriage · xoxo

You’ve got mail!

February 28th, 2013 · 63 Comments

Writes our submitter in Boston: “Our mailman always finds the most creative and effective ways to convey his thoughts to those who neglect their mail.”

Congratulations 2d — You must be proud of the fact that you have accumulated the most mail ever in Back Bay history for someone who has not left the country, enough in fact that it now completely fills a 2nd unused mailbox here. Celebrate!! Be proud! Revel in the glory

related: Apartment D is NOT vacant!

Tags: Boston · going postal · public shaming

…but don’t do that.

February 26th, 2013 · 41 Comments

Slow clap for this building manager in Boston, anyone?

Do anything you want with the paper towels! It's an arts neighborhood: make a sculpture. Winter's coming: make a neck ruff. Roll your own: and smoke away from the building. But please don't put them in the toilet!! Put them in the trash...throw them out the nearest window...adopt them...send them to reform school...but don't put them in the toilet! Our staff and the people downstairs are very tired of the overflow floods.

related: Things to do this summer

Tags: bathroom · Boston · toilet

Gee, thanks for the advice.

February 20th, 2013 · 66 Comments

Steve in Los Angeles says his dog has been having some separation anxiety, typically crying for about 30 minutes to an hour after Steve leaves for work. He recently found this oh-so-helpful advice taped to his front door. (His response: “WTF?!”)

Hello, I'm not sure if you're aware but your dog barks almost non stop when you're gone. He seems very unhappy. I had a similar problem but finally worked it out. Good luck.

Steve, just to put things in perspective, you might want to take a look at the Chicago approach:

To the inconsiderate asshole on the third floor who's dog won't shut the fuck up. If you don't start closing your window, the dog is gonna take a bullet. You've been warned.

related: My bite is work than your bark

Tags: "helpful" advice · Chicago · dogs · Los Angeles · neighbors · noise · warning

Do you hear the people sing?

February 18th, 2013 · 53 Comments

Cynthia in San Francisco says she was about to check the class schedule at her gym when she saw that their website was no longer operational. “There is so much YES going on here,” she says, of the screenshots she was able to grab. “I barely make it to the gym anyway and this is a great excuse to quit altogether. I’m more of a yoga person anyhow!”

Fitness SF preferred to ignore our invoices instead of paying them. As a result this website is no longer operational.

Fitness SF preferred to ignore our invoices instead of paying them. As a result this website is no longer operational.

related: The Mad Bomber

extra credit: Burger King Twitter Hacked, Turned into McDonalds [gizmodo.com]

Tags: gym · money · posted online · San Francisco