Entries Tagged as 'United States'

Thank You, Merry Terry!

December 19th, 2011 · 24 Comments

It’s a PAN miracle! After reaching a hilltop on a holiday hike, Mary in Phoenix found this decorated desert tree.

A gift from Merry Terry of Phoenix

Upon closer inspection, Mary noticed this (only slightly cranky) message from “Merry Terry.”

Merry Terry says enjoy this tree. I expect some help next year.

Altogether now, everyone…

related: Thank You Terry!

Tags: Christmas · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · holiday spirit · Phoenix · WTF?

Public Displays of Long-Distance Affection

December 18th, 2011 · 46 Comments

Ryan came home from work tonight and found this taped to the front door of his Chicago apartment building.

It could be worse, of course. Adds Ryan, “At least she plays nice guitar.”

To the guy who lives at the south end of the building and skypes his girlfriend every night at 3am: Hey man, I know you and your girlfriend are in different time zones, and I understand you have to talk to her EVERY NIGHT AT 2-4 AM, but could you please keep your voice down, and maybe use a headphone instead of the speaker? It's nice that your girlfriend has a beautiful singing voice and plays nice guitar, but I really can't appreciate her performance at this ungodly hour. I've been waken [sic] up three nights in a row by you guys and I sincerely hope it won't turn into a full season of your personal American idol show. PLEASE USE A HEADPHONE! Thank you. Someone who only gets 4 hours of sleep these days.

related: Toto, I have a feeling we’re not at band camp anymore

Tags: Chicago · neighbors · noise · sleeping

In the spirit of the holidays…enjoy the pipe bomb!

December 16th, 2011 · 36 Comments

My friend Amy and her husband recently had a UPS package stolen from their front porch. Thanks to the wonders of a home security camera, they were able to see that the thieves were actually their next-door neighbors. After a few rounds of “WHAT? WHO DOES THAT? REALLY?” they called the cops and had the fools arrested. (Score: Technology – 1; Humanity – 0.)

Meanwhile, the residents under siege at this Denver apartment building seem to be taking the vigilante approach to justice. Somehow, unless Batman shows up, I just don’t see this ending well.

Dear Grinch Stealing Packages from His and/or Her Neighbors, In the Spirit of the Holidays, I am choosing to let you know that I have sent myself (and a cooperating neighbor on another floor, from whom you have also stolen) one or more extra special presents, JUST FOR YOU! I really hope that you like them! I spent a lot of time and care on them as I wanted to make sure you know just how special you are to me!

related: Creative approaches to food thievery

Tags: Christmas · Denver · holiday spirit · kinda creepy · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · stealing

I did the dishes! Where’s my cookie?

December 14th, 2011 · 53 Comments

Explains our submitter in Ohio: “Before leaving for winter break, the chronic dish-neglecting roommate of the house tried her hand at washing dishes for the first time.” Not content to pat herself on the back, she then posted this rationalization for why she shouldn’t have to feel guilty about the dirty dishes she’s left in the sink all year.

You can pretty much guess how that went over with the roomies…

Guess What?? I cleaned the dishes — even the ones that were NOT mine... and guess what again? It did NOT kill me and I did NOT magically transform into your MOTHER. You want to know what it felt like? It felt like a person that lives in this house understanding that her ROOMMATES have been extremely busy recently and she had some extra time to be able to help out. You want to know how much time it took out of my day? About ten minutes!!

related: Because of you, the shower I was looking forward to all day was RUINED!

Tags: Did you know? · dishes · Ohio · roommates · Your mother doesn't...

Christmas lights manufactured by a particularly hardcore Elf on the Shelf

December 13th, 2011 · 48 Comments

Angela and her father were poking around the local dollar store in Metuchen, New Jersey when we they came across these boxes of Christmas lights.

“We originally thought these vaguely ominous messages were meant to harken back to the ‘true spirit of Christmas’ but these threats don’t exactly engender goodwill toward men,” Angela says. “I don’t know for whom these vaguely ominous messages are really intended, but s/he must have seriously pissed off the manufacturer.”

PEOPLE ARE WRONG TO FOCUS NARROWLY ON THEMSELVES

PEOPLE ARE WRONG TO FOCUS NARROWLY ON THEMSELVES

IF YOU SACRIFICE OTHERS FOR YOURSELF, YOU WILL SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES.

 IF YOU SACRIFICE OTHERS FOR YOURSELF, YOU WILL SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES.

related: Subliminal self-esteem killers

extra credit: Evil Elf on the Shelf

Tags: Christmas · most popular notes of 2011 · New Jersey · WTF?

Sunday night laundry room showdown

December 12th, 2011 · 114 Comments

Emily in Michigan happens to go to the university with the largest residence hall system in the U.S., and the Sunday-night scene in the dorm laundry room can be, well, a bit of a shit show.

This is the scene Emily came across one such Sunday:

Sunday night laundry room showdown

And underneath…

Whoever took my clothes out of this dryer: It takes me HOURS to do laundry. I sanitize every washing machine + dryer with Lysol before I use it, + take great pains to not let my clothes touch anything in this room

ESPECIALLY the floor or table. By dumping my clean laundry on the table, you have completely disrespected my property + privacy (seriously, don't touch someone's underwear?!?) Please don't touch other people's shit again.

(Adds Emily: “The laundry room is very clean, but I guess some people need a little extra.”)

The saga continues when an innocent bystander jumps in to make nice…

While I understand and respect where you're coming from, I do not understand why you would let your clothes sit in the dryer for 15+ minutes when the laundry room is clearly backed up. In other words, be respectful and promptly take care of your shit. :)

Meanwhile, the instigator of all this is not the smiley face type.

To the person who left their clothes in the dryer forever

(just click the image above to enlarge it)

related: To whoever violated my laundry…

Tags: college life · guilt trip · laundry · Michigan · non-apology apology · note wars · rebuttals · smiley · that's disrespectful · touching

Merry Christmas…with an emphasis on the “meh”

December 11th, 2011 · 43 Comments

In Joe’s Tuscaloosa neighborhood, a lot of folks go all-out with their Christmas decorations. While driving around the other night admiring the various Griswold-style scenes, Joe was especially amused to stumble upon this outlier.

MEH

Perhaps they took inspiration from the house below on the right?

<---- DITTO

related: Providing a “friendly holiday spirit”

Tags: Alabama · Christmas · most popular notes of 2011 · smartass

So…atheists shop for free?

December 8th, 2011 · 43 Comments

Spotted by Analee at Houston’s annual Nutcracker Market, “a holiday shopping wonderland“…

This business belonds to God. If you steal from us you are stealing from Him. It's much cheaper to pay our price than His. Thanks!

related: No, He uses Vaseline.

Tags: God · guilt trip · Houston · retail hell · stealing

DON’T STOP (being old and cranky)

December 7th, 2011 · 49 Comments

Kids today!!!

[STOP] That means YOU young man in the blue Subaru and turn the music down

(Thanks to Robyn from Durango, Colorado for the submission.)

related: Roommate wanted…NO OLDS!!!

Tags: Colorado · driving · kids today · most popular notes of 2011 · old folks

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion

December 5th, 2011 · 45 Comments

Welcome to the set of Mean Girls: Orlando!

The initial note:

This apartment needs Christmas spirit! Let me know if you want to chip in so we can get decorations! —Steph

And the response…

This apartment needs cleaning spirit! Let me know if you want to help out a[nd] clean up your mess! —Angel

related:  Oh sweetie, I love it when you talk dirty!

Tags: Christmas · cleaning · holiday spirit · nice stationery · Orlando · roommates · sarcasm