Entries Tagged as 'Pennsylvania'

Passive-aggressive mad libs

July 30th, 2008 · 132 Comments

This note from a “friendly neighbor” was put through the mailslot of Dan’s apartment in the heart of South Philly. Says Dan: “I wanted to put ‘thanks for the advice!’ on the door in response, but thought better of it.”

passive-aggressive mad libs

As infuriating as the note was, “I do love how they phoned in the underlining on ‘of’ and ‘the,’ then went to town with ‘curb,’” Dan says. “Thank you, friendly neighbor, for the best piece of bulletin board material I’ve ever gotten.”

related: two birds with one snowman

Tags: excessive underlining · garbage · gloriously redundant · neighbors · Philadelphia

The womb that would birth a thousand excuses

July 8th, 2008 · 214 Comments

The most irritating part of finding this note propped on her keyboard, says Jackie in Philly, is that she wasn’t the person who requested dark chocolate in the office vending machine. “In fact, I can’t stand the stuff!” (In that case…hello, baby shower gift?)

Hi Jackie, Since you requested the dark chocolate, please eat it. The pregnant person needs chocolate & your bars are taking up valuable space for GOOD TASTING chocolate. :)

related: Bun — er, — pizza in the oven

Tags: office · Philadelphia · preggers · smiley · vending machine drama

Stop! In the name of clip art.

April 15th, 2008 · 80 Comments

Like this phrase, there are a few irritating little pieces of clip art that keep popping up in submissions over and over again. Hovering somewhere near the top of most-wanted list is this pouty little white-gloved dandy.

From the factories of Pittsburgh…

STOP TAKING OTHER PEOPLE'S FOOD OUT OF THE REFRIGERATOR FREEZER IF IT DOESN'T BELONG TO YOU!

…to the cube-farms of Virginia, this perspiring misanthrope has been spreading his message of intolerance with impunity.

But, once again, it’s a note from a church bathroom (this one spotted by Jess in Boston) that really pushes things to a whole new level of divine didacticism.

No! Stop!

Can I get a witness?!

related: clip art crimes

Tags: bathroom · Boston · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · exclamation-point happy!!!! · gloriously redundant · most popular notes of 2008 · neighbors · office fridge · Pittsburgh

This is why your postal worker is disgruntled

January 14th, 2008 · 75 Comments

Amanda spotted this on the door of the post office in Milford, Pennsylvania. (Confidential to the fecal matter general: Dude, I know recycling can be a hassle sometimes, but this seems like a little much.)

Please help us catch the customer that is depositing FECES in our lobby trash cans lobby trash is only for paper trash

Perhaps the Brooklynites who issued this poetical preemptive warning knew what they were doing all along…

a legionnaire's idea of epigrammatic wit

related: this is why your server is cranky

Tags: CAPS LOCK · garbage · going postal · more like crazy · Pennsylvania · shit

Eats, shoots and leaves

November 18th, 2007 · 165 Comments

Joey in Pittsburgh spotted this one on the campus of Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh. Now that’s the thanksgiving spirit!

that's the thanksgiving spirit

Meanwhile, a different version of this photo floating around shows what appears to be a copy-edited version. ain’t punctuation grand?

nosoul.jpg

Tags: college life · garbage · Pittsburgh · You call that punctuation? · you're like so going to hell

A fancy feast

September 4th, 2007 · 126 Comments

Joshua brings us this amazing pair of notes from his apartment building in Philly.

The backstory: “A bulk package of cat food (probably 20 or so cans) was delivered and sat in the hallway for about 4 or 5 days.  We could see what it was because the sides of the package were cardboard, but the top was clear plastic. (Like what you’d find at Costco).  On day 3 or 4 of the cat food being left in the hallway, the plastic had been torn back and a few cans were taken.” The next day, the package was claimed, and this note appeared…

Many thanks to whoever opened up a package that was addressed to me, and stole $19 worth of cat food. Opening up someone else's mail is a federal offense. I hope your cat chokes on the food. :)

Two days later — luckily, after Joshua snapped a photo — the note disappeared. In its place…

To whomever put up the note wishing death upon something's cat over $20, I (ZF) took the note down. I didn't steal your cat's food. I don't have a cat. Did you consider the evil felon who stole your cat's food doesn't live here? There have been a number of workers in the building lately and the food sat there for days. Anyway, I found the note irritating and a little weird (wish cats dead and all) and took it down.

A day later, the response note was torn down, too.

Tags: cats · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · Philadelphia · rebuttals · smiley · stealing · thanks (but not really) · that's illegal

Is this what a post-post-feminist looks like?

August 15th, 2007 · 106 Comments

Brandy in York Haven, Pennsylvania forgot to put water back in the fridge, she says, “and my boyfriend likes his cold water.” Yikes.

Brandy! Put some fucking water back in Fridge so there is cold water for other that are in the house that might want cold water Thanks Management :)

Also note the list of tasks for Brandy and her boyfriend at upper right. Um, so much for challenging gender stereotypes at home, huh?

Tags: battle of the sexes · exclamation-point happy!!!! · heart · Pennsylvania · sig o · smiley · water · whiteboard

 
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