Entries Tagged as 'Texas'
A busy working mom in Austin, Texas got this little love note on her BlackBerry from her sixteen-year-old son. (Michael is his friend, by the way, not the craft store.)
In the end, our submitter adds, he didn’t take the bus after all. Total bluff!
related: friends don’t lie 2 friends
Tags: Austin · e-mail · kids today · Moms & Dads · schools & teachers · signed with love · spelling and grammar police
Alec in Houston found this little work of art on his desk, he says, “after I went out for lunch and didn’t do the dishes like they had asked.” With gritted teeth, he goes on: “They have ‘too much work’ and I have ‘none’ so I might as well wash them!”
related: Al Gore knows you drove when you could have taken your new bicycle
Tags: a little patronizing · dishes · Houston · office · thanks (but not really) · The Earth
Writes Tim in Berkeley: “Although this note is over 17 years old, I think it’s still worth submitting, at the very least as an example of notes from a bygone era. I received this note from the apartment manager when I was a senior at Rice University, living in an off-campus apartment. Admittedly, I wasn’t the cleanest tenant — but what 20-year-old college kid living alone in a studio apartment is?”
Adds Tim: “The really sad thing was that I had cleaned my apartment before this note — she should have seen the place before!”
related: be informed, homeland security will be
Tags: cleaning · college life · Houston · landlords and property managers · Texas · that's disgusting
What to do after you’ve already written your daily letters to the editor, congressman and the local weatherman and you’ve still got hours to go before the early bird buffet? Well, you turn to the classifieds!
related: Cloudy with a chance of hate mail
Tags: awk abbrev · comma diarrhea · excessive underlining · garage sale · Houston · old folks · unsolicited feedback · You call that punctuation?
Our submitter, Glenn, says this all-staff e-mail “just kinda sucked the life out of us” around his office. “It was like a Mom saying ‘Guess what, kids?” in a really excited voice, and then saying ‘You’re going to the dentist!!!‘”
But the best part of this note — besides the pitch-perfect forced jollity — is the fact that at the time this message was sent, only one person in the office (Glenn) happened to have long sideburns and a “fun” faux hawk. So, gosh darn it, life is still good!
related: the classic all-staff e-mail
Tags: a little patronizing · all-staff e-mail · now that's management · office · rhetorical question · Texas
Our anonymous submitter found several copies of this notice posted around her McMansion-filled neighborhood in Leander, Texas, just five charmingly rustic miles north of Austin proper. (If you’re a little short in the 4-H ribbon department, that’s your cue to shake your head and mutter “Pshaw, city folk!”)
related: If your grandma wrote PSAs
Tags: "helpful" advice · CAPS LOCK · horses, cows, & chickens · most popular notes of 2009 · MYOB · neighbors · Oops? · Texas · thanks (but not really)
First of all, the disclaimer: Our anonymous submitter in Houston lives in an apartment complex with very limited parking for residents. “When I come home from work late at night,” she explains, “the handicapped parking spot is typically the only one available.” That excuse, however, doesn’t seem to cut it for one of her neighbors.
As you’ll see from the note left on our submitter’s windshield, this eagle-eyed neighbor perhaps isn’t what you’d call “book-smart,” but — gosh darn it — what she lacks in basic spelling and grammar skills she more than makes up for with raw gumption and a steely sense of self-righteousness!
[Rough translation, from our anonymous submitter: "I see that you are not handicapped, but you park in the handicapped parking spot in our apartment complex. I am not handicapped, and I don't know anyone in the complex who is, but I feel entitled to tell you to stop parking there. Furthermore, I feel entitled enough to have your car towed if you park there again."]
related: Mahvelous, just mahvelous
Tags: "helpful" advice · Houston · kinda creepy · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · parking · smiley · Texas · that's illegal
Our defendant, Lee in Austin, was just finishing off a travel-sized toothpaste from a recent business trip when Lee’s roommate — apparently oblivious to this small change in routine — became convinced that Lee was mooching off her tube of Advance White.
“My roommate told my boyfriend that she had left me ‘a note,’ and about a week later he asked me if I had seen it. I had not, because, in fact, I had never touched her damn toothpaste. But now, every time I reach for my toothpaste, I see this.”
And by the way, adds Lee, “She [said roommate] is currently out of shampoo.”
related: Oh, please. Do I look like someone who uses drugstore shampoo?
Tags: Austin · hygiene · meta · roommates · sharing is caring
I hereby declare the writer of the second note in this exchange (from a college art studio in Texas) the winner of the season’s official “oh, snap!” award.
(Sure, the original note-writer might have a case — but just like those pesky BCS rankings, style points count, baby!)
related: i before e except after c ftw
Tags: art · Austin · college life · garbage · oh snap · Texas
September 30th, 2008 · 88 Comments
“My dear, sweet grandmother lived a long, full life and passed away recently at the age of 88,” writes Mark in Denton, Texas, but he still has the valentine his “Memaw” sent him back in 2005, during his freshman year of college.
Before the cockles of your heart get too warmed, however, take note: says Mark, “What appears at first glance to be an innocent, heartfelt valentine turned out to contain a message that pretty much sums up how she felt about me going to college a whole hour-and-a-half away, rather than the crappy local college…because apparently, that was my way of saying that my home and family just weren’t important to me.”
On behalf of Jewish grandmas everywhere…Happy Rosh Hashanah, everyone!
related: Why is it on this night we’re like, allowed to eat carbs?
Tags: college life · family · Grandma · guilt trip · Say wha? · signed with love · Texas