Entries Tagged as 'Texas'
First of all, the disclaimer: Our anonymous submitter in Houston lives in an apartment complex with very limited parking for residents. “When I come home from work late at night,” she explains, “the handicapped parking spot is typically the only one available.” That excuse, however, doesn’t seem to cut it for one of her neighbors.
As you’ll see from the note left on our submitter’s windshield, this eagle-eyed neighbor perhaps isn’t what you’d call “book-smart,” but — gosh darn it — what she lacks in basic spelling and grammar skills she more than makes up for with raw gumption and a steely sense of self-righteousness!
[Rough translation, from our anonymous submitter: "I see that you are not handicapped, but you park in the handicapped parking spot in our apartment complex. I am not handicapped, and I don't know anyone in the complex who is, but I feel entitled to tell you to stop parking there. Furthermore, I feel entitled enough to have your car towed if you park there again."]
related: Mahvelous, just mahvelous
Tags: "helpful" advice · Houston · kinda creepy · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · parking · smiley · Texas · that's illegal
Our defendant, Lee in Austin, was just finishing off a travel-sized toothpaste from a recent business trip when Lee’s roommate — apparently oblivious to this small change in routine — became convinced that Lee was mooching off her tube of Advance White.
“My roommate told my boyfriend that she had left me ‘a note,’ and about a week later he asked me if I had seen it. I had not, because, in fact, I had never touched her damn toothpaste. But now, every time I reach for my toothpaste, I see this.”
And by the way, adds Lee, “She [said roommate] is currently out of shampoo.”
related: Oh, please. Do I look like someone who uses drugstore shampoo?
Tags: Austin · hygiene · meta · roommates · sharing is caring
I hereby declare the writer of the second note in this exchange (from a college art studio in Texas) the winner of the season’s official “oh, snap!” award.
(Sure, the original note-writer might have a case — but just like those pesky BCS rankings, style points count, baby!)
related: i before e except after c ftw
Tags: art · Austin · college life · garbage · oh snap · Texas
September 30th, 2008 · 88 Comments
“My dear, sweet grandmother lived a long, full life and passed away recently at the age of 88,” writes Mark in Denton, Texas, but he still has the valentine his “Memaw” sent him back in 2005, during his freshman year of college.
Before the cockles of your heart get too warmed, however, take note: says Mark, “What appears at first glance to be an innocent, heartfelt valentine turned out to contain a message that pretty much sums up how she felt about me going to college a whole hour-and-a-half away, rather than the crappy local college…because apparently, that was my way of saying that my home and family just weren’t important to me.”
On behalf of Jewish grandmas everywhere…Happy Rosh Hashanah, everyone!
related: Why is it on this night we’re like, allowed to eat carbs?
Tags: college life · family · Grandma · guilt trip · Say wha? · signed with love · Texas
Tags: confusion??? · family · food · office · Ontario · signed with love · Texas
I recently returned from a few days in San Antonio, Texas, where my friend Matt and I amused ourselves on the Riverwalk with a competition to find the tackiest souvenir possible in each store within three minutes or less. (My first win: a “pooping armadillo” keychain.) When we entered this fine establishment, however, I had to call a time-out.
I didn’t even get a chance to take photos of all the signs at this one store — including some amazing ones taped to the register — before I started getting the stink-eye from the manager. (I generally try to stay out of trouble in states that allow their teachers to come to class armed.) I’m telling you, Alamo, Schmalamo: this store was the highlight of my trip.
related: Tourist traps have the best signs
Tags: "customer service" · blitzkrieg approach · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · heart · high on highlighter · San Antonio · Texas · touching · tourists
Jesse says he spotted this sign at a great Mongolian restaurant in the Dallas area. “They recently changed their name from Ton’s Mongolian Grill to Tao’s garden, but apparently they haven’t figured out how to spell it yet.”
related: Best. Potluck. Theme. Ever.
Tags: "customer service" · CAPS LOCK · Dallas/Fort Worth · food · restaurant · spelling and grammar police
Three U.S. cities where nature-lovers might want to keep their hands to themselves:
1. Austin, Texas
2. Macon, Georgia
3. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
(Thanks to Don in Austin, Elizabeth in Macon, and Jasmine in Pittsburgh for risking the wrath of some devoted gardening/second amendment enthusiasts to document these warnings.)
related: No “questions” asked
Tags: Austin · blame it on the crackhead · CAPS LOCK · exclamation-point happy!!!! · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · Georgia · Macon · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · Pittsburgh · spelling and grammar police · stealing
You say you’re politically engaged, but do you know where your candidate stands on…vanity license plates? Are they:
a) a bombastic example of the first amendment in action
b) a potent symbol for the reductive nature of America’s two-party political system
c) unwise at any speed
Still undecided? Take a look at the tags Rachel has on her car in Austin, Texas:
And the note she found recently on her windshield:
Meanwhile, in blue-state land…
Which led to this note posted in the office parking garage, and documented for us by Melissa in Long Beach:
related: The audacity of theft
extra credit: License plates and the first amendment [nytimes.com]
extra extra credit: Rock the vote!
Tags: Austin · California · car · Long Beach · parking · politics
When Sheena in Austin spotted this note on her neighbor’s front door, she couldn’t help but wonder: “If your doormat has sentimental value, maybe it should be hanging on your wall instead of sitting on the ground?”
related: Wrath mat
extra credit: Sentimental value: clothing stories from eBay
Tags: Austin · eBay · excessive underlining · grow up · neighbors · stealing