Entries Tagged as 'Virginia'

Save the earth…kill the kids?

March 3rd, 2010 · 163 Comments

“I have no traces of child paraphernalia in my Mini Cooper,” says our submitter from Alexandria, Virginia — and she didn’t buy her car for environmental reasons. (“I bought it because I’m a Mini fan,” she says, “regardless of the global impact.”) So, as you might imagine, she was more than a bit puzzled to find this note under her wiper blade.

I hope you don't put Children in This Thing. Save the earth?) Kill the Kids!? Brilliant!

related: Herbie Goes to Washington

Tags: car · Northern Virginia · pure poetry · The Earth · unsolicited feedback · WTF?

Snowed in? Come meet your neighbors! (Unless you’re like, old.)

February 11th, 2010 · 84 Comments

Erin in Arlington, Virginia says this sign appeared in every elevator in her building during the D.C. area’s Snowmaggedon of 2010. “Apparently cabin fever requires drinks…and only people in their 20s and early 30s.”

Snowed In? Come Meet Your Neighbors! Let's mingle :) Bring Your Own Drinks. Please be in your 20s or early 30s

related: no girls allowed

Tags: neighbors · Northern Virginia · old folks

Dirty, dirty bridesmaids

January 21st, 2010 · 77 Comments

“I was forced to go wedding dress shopping with a total bridezilla I know,” writes our submitter in Fredericksburg, Virginia. “Another girl with us is also engaged to be married, and she wanted to try on dresses too. Bridezilla just smiled sweetly and pointed to the sign posted in the dressing room. Her exact words: ‘Sorry, only the bride is allowed, and today is my day.’”

There will be a $75 cleaning fee for wedding gowns being tried on by anyone other than the bride.

Apparently you’d better keep an eye on those shifty bridesmaids when they’re shopping for the bachelorette party, too. (Or else…cow them into submission with more threats of an unenforceable nature?)

Yeah, good luck with that

(Spotted by Molly at “Kitty House” boutique in Irvine, California.)

related: What say you, Emily Post?

Tags: California · stealing · Virginia · weddings and bridezillas · WTF?

Vindictive much?

December 19th, 2009 · 105 Comments

Writes James in Chesterfield, Virginia: “Poor Fayette didn’t know that you must remove staples before feeding paper into the copier. Even though she is 70 years old and always brings fresh brownies on Fridays for everyone in the office, someone still felt the need to publicly (and anonymously) humiliate her.”

You know, because a simple “the copier is broken” would leave just too many unanswered questions.

Yes, Fayette broke the copier. You will need to place the paper on the glass until the feeder can be repaired.

related: Graham, this means you

Tags: office · oh no you didn't · Virginia

Thanksgiving Pride & Passive-Aggression

November 25th, 2009 · 106 Comments

Writes Rebecca in Staunton, Virginia:  “My college dining hall is pretty awful. The food isn’t very good and the lines are always incredibly long.  So, when we had our Thanksgiving dinner a couple days ago (one of the few meals where the food is actually good and we can serve ourselves), naturally people got over-excited and took more food than the dining hall expected.  The next day, we found this little ‘apology’ taped over the menu suggestion box and on every single table.”

Thanksgiving Pride & Passive-Aggression

related: don’t blame us

Tags: college life · don't blame us · holiday spirit · non-apology apology · Thanksgiving · Virginia

Miss Place is SO SERIOUS

October 15th, 2009 · 239 Comments

Ashley in Richmond, Virginia says this e-mail was sent to every single employee at her office. Then, “after thirty minutes, the sender attempted to recall it six times.” (That’s how you know she was SO SERIOUS.)

passiveaggressivenotes.com: funny, spelling-and-grammar-challenged e-mail to office about missing boost mobile cell phone

related: the classic all-staff e-mail

Tags: all-staff e-mail · CAPS LOCK · cell phone · Richmond · spelling and grammar police

Takashi Murakami meets Lilly Pulitzer meets “no cuts, no buts, no coconuts”

September 22nd, 2009 · 127 Comments

Dee Dee in Virginia says her five-year-old daughter, Lilly, presented her with this card after Kindergarten last week.

“At first it seems like the usual ‘I love mommy’ card,” Dee Dee says, “but the back clearly addresses her irritation with the neighboring copycat whose use of hearts, stars, and flowers were infringing on my daughter’s copyrighted design. (Coming soon to a overpriced handbag near you!)

five year old's i love mommy card width=

five year old's do not copy me card

related: startin’ young

Tags: kids · Virginia

Thanks for not asking

July 16th, 2009 · 140 Comments

Let me stop you right there. Before you say anything else, have you consulted this sign, as spotted on the door of a souvenir shop by Angie in Seattle?

No, we do not have change for the meter. Thanks for not asking

Or this one, as seen by Meghann outside a bar in San Francisco?

NO, I DON'T HAVE AN EXTRA CIGARETTE!

Well, then your questions will certainly be answered by my personal favorite, spotted by Jessie at a sandwich shop in Charlottesville, Virginia:

YES, WE WASH OUR LEMONS!!! NO, THERE ARE NO PRESCRIPTION DRUGS IN OUR FILTERED WATER!!!

related: Listing in NOW Magazine’s adult classifieds? $70. Revenge?

Tags: "customer service" · Charlottesville · exclamation-point happy!!!! · San Francisco · Seattle · thanks (but not really) · Virginia

That personalized “missing jelly jar” stationery finally comes in handy…

June 10th, 2009 · 132 Comments

Extra P in Charlottesville, Virginia found this note in his office break room. He draws our attention to two sections in particular: “the ‘let there be closure’ line, which seems more appropriate for a break-up note, and the ‘mark an X if you threw it away’ part, which reminds me of grade school mash notes. Besides, what did our local kleptomaniac want with a jelly jar full of water, anyway?”

Missing jelly jar please return

related: Next time, go for the Fiji?

Missing jelly jar please return. The night before last I put a kelly jar on the dish rack full of water, to soak. It has a water tight lid. I know it doesn’t seem like something important, but I would like it back. If you have it, please bring it back. If you threw it away, please let me know so there can be closure. Thank you.

Tags: Charlottesville · office · stealing · Virginia

Anyone for “Heart and Soul”?

November 24th, 2008 · 90 Comments

“There are several common rooms in my dormitory at Indiana University, and most of them have pianos available for the students to play,” writes Jain in Bloomington.

“While I can empathize with this anonymous student’s frustration, possibly after hearing the third or fourth broken attempt at ‘Chopsticks’ in a single day, I’ve personally found the exit to be a more successful coping strategy than leaving bitchy notes on a baby grand. But hey, different strokes…”

Please DO NOT play the piano unless you are actually good. Thanks!

Meanwhile, Dan spotted a supermarket in Sterling, Virginia that took the above note-writer’s sentiment just a half-step further.

Piano is for entertainment only. Please do not play. Thanks

related:  I used to be your biggest fan

extra credit: pearls before breakfast [washingtonpost.com]

Tags: college life · Indiana · music · noise · Northern Virginia · Virginia