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Entries Tagged as 'Washington state'

And your mosaic sucks

May 19th, 2010 · 77 Comments

Anybody else in the mood for a no-holds-barred, batshit-crazy tirade? ’Cause I sure am! Pretty much the only thing remotely “passive” about this message — which Jared in Seattle found taped to the front entrance of his share house  — is the fact that it was delivered by note, rather than say, by fist.

The note writer takes a little while here to build up steam, but manages to get in at least one solidly below-the-belt jab before spiraling into a CAPS LOCK-induced rage blackout.

related: Worst secret admirer ever?

Tags: fuck fuckity fuck fuck · money · sarcasm · Seattle · spelling and grammar police · thanks (but not really) · WTF?

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got Call of Duty 4 on pause

March 22nd, 2010 · 88 Comments

Jack and Sarah in Tacoma, Washington both spotted this note taped to the window of a coffee shop outside the Fort Lewis military base in Tillicum. While I particularly enjoy the slow crescendo of this note, I’m not sure the manager of the H&R Block across the street would feel the same.

Dear Tillicum Thieves, While I appreciate your initiative and hard work I'd like to suggest you not break our window. There is an H&R Block across the street and I'm certain their computers are much newer and nicer than ours. I live in the neighborhood and would appreciate you not stealing from a local non-profit that provides services to soldiers and veterans. Also, I will shoot you in the fucking face. Thanks! The Management

related: Raging against the little guy

Tags: most popular notes of 2010 · not-so-veiled threats · stealing · vandalism · Washington state

Which is more despicable?

November 30th, 2009 · 206 Comments

Exhibit A, as seen by an anonymous submitter in Seattle?


…or exhibit B, as spotted by Mitch in Goldendale, Washington?

I'm sorry Tobby was stoled.

related: And God knows what

Tags: CAPS LOCK · comma diarrhea · confusion??? · exclamation-point happy!!!! · guilt trip · karma's a bitch · Seattle · spelling and grammar police · stealing · Washington state

Waiting for the rapture (and/or a thank you note)

November 5th, 2009 · 159 Comments

Writes Ben in Snohomish, Washington: “We visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don’t do so daily. She took the occasion of my son’s 11th birthday to take a shot at us.” birthday card - waiting for the second coming (and/or a thank you note)

related: my condolences on your birthday

Tags: birthday · family · guilt trip · Jesus · most popular notes of 2009 · old folks · Washington state

An evening of congenial abnormality

August 17th, 2009 · 136 Comments

Alexandra in Renton, Washington received this invitation from a former supervisor at a hospital. “Rumors had been circulating that she and another supervisor had a personality clash, and then recently an e-mail was distributed indicating that her position had been terminated.”

The invitation gets off to a roaring start with the mention of “12 years, the first ten of them terrific,” and the “come hear all about it” seems to portend some seriously juicy trash-talking.  Says Alexandra: “I wouldn’t miss this party for the world.”

congenital conversation and memories will be served

related: You were warned never to push Carrie to the limits

Tags: farewell letter · fired · fun with malapropisms · Washington state

Thanks for not asking

July 16th, 2009 · 140 Comments

Let me stop you right there. Before you say anything else, have you consulted this sign, as spotted on the door of a souvenir shop by Angie in Seattle?

No, we do not have change for the meter. Thanks for not asking

Or this one, as seen by Meghann outside a bar in San Francisco?


Well, then your questions will certainly be answered by my personal favorite, spotted by Jessie at a sandwich shop in Charlottesville, Virginia:


related: Listing in NOW Magazine’s adult classifieds? $70. Revenge?

Tags: "customer service" · Charlottesville · exclamation-point happy!!!! · San Francisco · Seattle · thanks (but not really) · Virginia

In other words…the butterflies are passive-aggressive

June 17th, 2009 · 106 Comments

Writes Dan in Seattle: “I work at a hospital and often ride my motorcycle to work. There is another hospital employee that also does so, and we usually park in the same area. Space is at a premium —especially around this woman and her self-proclaimed 10-foot-wide protected parking bubble. Another time she left me a note asking me not to block her in (when I hadn’t blocked her in!) but this latest note from her is the best encounter by far. I parked behind her about a foot back, leaving plenty —and I mean plenty — of room for her to pull out, but apparently that wasn’t enough for her.”

This time, Dan says, “for the safety of my motorcycle (and obviously, out of spite), I told the police.” Lucky for us, he scanned a copy of the note first. It’s the totally “biker chick” stationery that makes it, of course.

The next time you park your bike directly behind me I'll roll it back into the middle of the street!

related: Hello kancer!

Tags: heart · motorcycles · nice stationery · not-so-veiled threats · parking · Seattle

Another unexpected consequence of global warming

June 5th, 2009 · 241 Comments

Writes Mike in Seattle: “I work in a large in-house call center for a giant of the aerospace industry. My office has 50 to 75 technical support folks, many of whom can be somewhat…less than hygienic. Following a rash of uncharacteristically hot days, this note showed up in the mens’ room, accompanied by a bottle of Axe.”

Complimentary Body Spray

related: There are only ten types of people in the world…those who remember to bathe regularly, an those who don’t

Tags: hygiene · odor · office · Seattle

So…you guys take AmEx, right?

May 31st, 2009 · 196 Comments

If you’re still a little confused about the forms of payment accepted at this shoe repair shop, Kate in Seattle says that while she could only capture four signs in this picture, there’s a fifth sign further to the right as well. (That’s the one that clears it up.) guys take AmEx, right?

related: as Davy Crockett once said…

Tags: blitzkrieg approach · Seattle

Ain’t that the gospel truth?

March 11th, 2009 · 102 Comments

Chris says this note was slipped under his apartment door  by one of his “typically passive-aggressive Seattle neighbors.” And no, he adds, he hadn’t noticed. Perhaps because the door was lacking in aggressively punctuated parenthetical statements!! (Homeowners dues??)

Hey Neighbors! Notice the front door isn't closing on its own? (It's been a few weeks!!) Anyone can walk in off the street! (Rape, Burgle, Murder!) Maybe somebody should have it looked at!! (homeowner's dues...) Can we please try to make sure the door stays closed??

Personally, I am just luuurving the nice little call-and-response rhythm this note has got goin’ on. I eagerly await the OutKast “Rape Burgle Murder” remix!(!!)

related: Everyone: shut it

Tags: confusion??? · exclamation-point happy!!!! · irregular capitalization · neighbors · opening/closing · Seattle · You call that punctuation?