Entries Tagged as 'college life'

This aggression will not stand, man

September 22nd, 2007 · 163 Comments

As a little weekend bonus, I bring you this screed from the Smith Daily Jolt’s alumnae forum. Yes, it’s long.

dailyjolt1.jpg [Read more →]

Tags: bathroom · college life · e-mail · garbage · just an asshole · martyr complex · money · not wrong · posted online · rebuttals · roommates · sig o · smoking · that's a fire hazard · TL;DR

She slipped the registrar 30 pieces of silver

September 14th, 2007 · 180 Comments

This note, from the science library of Washington & Lee University in Lexington, Virginia, has a bit of a backstory.

Explains our anonymous submitter: “Here, you can reserve a carrel for the entire school year, with two students to a carrel. Our honor system is such that people leave their books and belongings at their carrel basically all the time.” Our submitter caught sight of this little exchange and sneakily made a photocopy to share with us. (Oh, and FYI: “A&P,” our submitter says, refers to Anatomy and Physiology — a popular course that generally only seniors get into.)

To the Judas who is sharing my carrol [sic],  As if it were not enough that you betrayed me & took the A&P class that I could not get in; You have also decided to flaunt the forementioned [sic] book on my carrol [sic]. You may be heartless. Heart, Your carrol (sp?) mate!

Tags: college life · library · martyr complex · rebuttals · sharing is caring · signed with love · spelling and grammar police · Virginia

I think it’s going to be a long long time

August 20th, 2007 · 194 Comments

Today’s tasteless gross-out is brought to us by Christina in Irvine, California. (My apologies in advance.)

Here's my new decree: Everyone with rocket pubes has to put a fucking hairnet over their balls before entering the showers/bathrooms in the dorms. I was in the shower today, lathering, rinsing, a little repeating — and I look over at the plastic shower curtain. To my fucking amazement there is a pube at about shoulder level.

Tags: all clogged up · bathroom · California · college life · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · group bitchfest · hair · Irvine · most popular notes of 2007 · shower · that's disgusting

Cleaning party!

July 30th, 2007 · 32 Comments

Justin in Winston-Salem, N.C. spotted this classic mom note on the fridge at his friends’ house — with a bonus roommate note, to boot!

Says Justin: “I love the magnet — not sure if it’s supposed to be a letter grade or not, but I prefer to think that it is. If they get an F, I’d get a negative B or so.”

You Boys need to have a Cleaning Party! :) Love, Mom

(Wings, corn dogs, taquitos AND mac & cheese? Ah, college.)

Tags: cleaning · college life · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · Moms & Dads · North Carolina · roommates · signed with love · smiley · spelling and grammar police

Passive-aggressive free-for-all

July 8th, 2007 · 78 Comments

During his fourth year of college, Andrew from Waterloo says he lived with some seriously passive-aggressive roommates. The following three notes all went up within a 48-hour period:

NOT for household use

very unsanitary (2 of 4)

VERY unsanitary (3 of 4)

Andrew couldn’t resist adding one of his own…

ooh! (4 of 4)

(It was promptly taken down.)

related: The post-it wars


Tags: college life · dishes · excessive underlining · rebuttals · roommates · stealing · that's unsanitary · Waterloo

Please help! My roommate is a passive-aggressive!

June 19th, 2007 · 26 Comments

“Apparently I was violating some building rules that annoyed my roommate,” says Alex in Waterloo, Ontario. “Rather than asking me in person, he wrote this on our front door for all to see.”

Please help! I am an imbecile! I am completely oblivious to others and have no regard for rules! Need help. (Will S.D. for money)

Tags: Canada · college life · roommates · Waterloo

The first thing I did when I woke up

June 16th, 2007 · 137 Comments

The third paragraph of the first e-mail is the brilliant part…though I’m gonna have to side with Michelle’s roommate on this one.

eating my outback bread

no excuses

Adds Michelle: “that bread was fucking delicious.”

Tags: bread · CAPS LOCK · Charlottesville · college life · e-mail · food · more aggressive than passive · most popular notes of 2007 · not-so-veiled threats · p.s. · Virginia

Letter from a narcotic

June 12th, 2007 · 52 Comments

This ranks right up there with the notice from an aspiring personal-injury lawyer as one of my favorite roommate notes of all time.

Gillian in Albany, New York points out that the malapropism here (“I am the narcotic one”) was actually deliciously appropriate, because “she cleaned exactly like cocaine.”

Obviously things have been weird with us lately and I have a hard time talking to us and I don't know the right way to approach you or how to say what I want to say to you without hopefully not hurting your feelings. But we're both mature individuals, so I figured the best way for me to communicate what I have to say to you would be through a letter.

related: This room is protected by the Constitution

Tags: cleaning · college life · fun with malapropisms · garbage · money · New York · roommates · runaway run-on sentences

And the Coco-Pops weren’t even yours.

June 9th, 2007 · 15 Comments

Vici lives in London with five flatmates — all guys.

milkgit.jpg

(If you don’t have a house full of cereal-stealing warcraft players like vici and don’t get the “orly?” thing…wikipedia to the rescue!)

related: cereal killer

Tags: college life · food · London · rebuttals · roommates · shameless meme-mongering · stealing

This room is protected by the Constitution

June 7th, 2007 · 75 Comments

This isn’t just a note — it’s a work of art. And it’s about 100 shades of amazing.

I’ll let Rich explain: “I had a party at my house once in college, and one of our roommates who was going to be gone was really scared that someone was going to sleep in his bed. so, instead of, you know, telling us not to use his room, he decided to post this hilarious note that only an aspiring personal injury lawyer could produce.”

This room is protected by the Constitution

I don't care if you just want a place to sleep STAY OUT. This is room is protected as later defined from trespassing. There is privileged information contain within.

Being in this room may be a violation of some or all of the following

Penalties Defined - per Iowa code + Federal law

related: CARE — it makes a difference

Tags: "helpful" advice · college life · excessive underlining · Iowa · more like crazy · not-so-veiled threats · questionable logic · roommates · TL;DR · touching