Entries Tagged as 'college life'

A spoonful of sugar might help this lesson in Newtonian physics go down

June 14th, 2011 · 47 Comments

This physics lesson was posted in the communal kitchen of Oxford University’s department of psychiatry.

“You would think that these people would be masters of communication,” our submitter says. “Evidently, not so much.”

A lesson in Newtonian Physics: If a spoon is washed in water, something it is very right and proper to be done, it still has residual water on it, unless dried.  If the spoon is placed on the draining board concave side up, gravitational force causes the water to sink into the concavity forming a puddle that is dependent on evaporation to remove it. If a male (it could only be a male) uses the bepuddled spoon to make himself coffee, water may get into the coffee tin and cause aggregation of the grounds which are hygyroscopic. This is given by these equations which are examples of a chaotic system (a Henon map) [equations] The solution to this problem is possibly too complex for members of this Department, but requires people to leave spoons convex side up.

In Australia, meanwhile, it seems they prefer not to beat around the bush* — at least when it comes to wet spoons.
DO NOT PUT WET DIRTY SPOONS IN SUGAR

related: The Ph.D’s approach to air conditioning units

*bad pun intended

Tags: a little patronizing · Australia · coffee · college life · note wars · office · spoons · U.K.

Meow, purr, RAWRRR!

May 31st, 2011 · 51 Comments

Our submitter at a university in Canberra spotted this first note while getting his morning coffee. “Pat (a professor in the department) has been complaining for weeks that her coffee mug seems to disappear and reappear spontaneously. Her mood varies with its presence.”

To the person who KEEPS taking my mug (it is this shape & has cartoon cats on it & says meouw purr) please STOP taking it away. I don't care if you use it but you must leave it in the tea room so I can also use it. Next time it is missing, I will track you down and stab you in the face with a bread knife. Pat

Several days later, our submitter spotted this addendum, written by another professor sympathetic to Pat’s cause. “Since the mug hasn’t turned up in over a week, I’m pretty sure the culprit is too afraid to return the mug at this point.” (Could you blame him?)

Also I can add the to the damage by grinding pepper into the wound. HK

related: Not to name names, but…

Tags: "accidental" "borrowing" · Australia · beverages · Canberra · cats · college life · not-so-veiled threats

Dear parents: this is what you WON’T be hearing from your newly minted college grads

May 22nd, 2011 · 39 Comments

(After all, once they’ve moved back home into their old bedrooms, they can just raid your liquor cabinet and sneak bills from your wallet, just like old times!)

Meanwhile, this note/social critique was spotted by James in downtown Iowa City, “amid dozens of bars and thousands of over-privileged young suburbanites.”

Dear dad, please stop sending me your money; I'll just use it to buy booze.

If, however, your entrepreneurial kiddos do decide to strike out their own, you might want to keep tabs on the Sudafed in the medicine cabinet. (Especially if “on their own” means “the room above the garage.”)

I don't have a meth lab (Never ever) LEAVE ME ALONE

related: Your daughter is a substance abuser and a PLAYER!

Tags: art · beer · college life · drugs · graffiti · Iowa · Moms & Dads · money

Why climb when you can RIDE?

May 17th, 2011 · 47 Comments

As it happens, our entire technical staff (a.k.a Eric) recently completed a Ph.D in computer science and took a job at the newly formed Max Planck Institute for Intelligent Systems in picturesque Tübingen, Germany. (That’s right kids, if you work hard, and get your doctorate in computer science, you too may one day be qualified enough to host a found-content blog!)

Upon arriving at MPI’s Tübingen campus, Eric immediately felt at home. Specifically, he spotted some encouraging signage right next to the second floor elevator in one of MPI’s buildings.

Why don't we take the Healthy Stairs

Besides being a powerful testament to Southern Germany’s deep love of hiking, this health conscious posting also highlights the institute’s international reach. As you can see, the note itself is actually a photograph of a sign that was originally posted at (by?) Korea University*.

Of course walking down a single flight of stairs is hardly an inconvenience, particularly since the stairs in question are literally across from the elevator and lead directly to the building’s main entrance. The folks on the third floor, however, have a different perspective on the situation. Posted next to the third floor elevator is this rather charming reply.

WHY CLIMB STAIRS WHEN YOU CAN RIDE...with the finest in home elevators

Finally, from across the Atlantic, students at the University of Virginia have brought to light an additional concern surrounding the classic elevator vs. stairs debate. The following note, spotted by Trisha, was placed by the stairs of her UVA apartment building…along with an entire box of fat-free vanilla pudding.

Please Do Not Heave Up and Down the Stairs Like a Herd of Diseased Buffalo. Utilize the Elevator if you Have a Fat Ass.

Needless to say, the pudding was gone by the end of the day.

* Perhaps you, dear reader, can keep this transcontinental chain alive. Please consider printing out your own copy of the above photo and posting it at your place of business and/or learning.

related: You’re not even wearing designer shoes, so there’s no reason why you should be taking the elevator one floor.

Tags: Charlottesville · college life · elevator · Germany · hey fatty · rebuttals

So, you were hoping to get an A for “asshole-like entitlement”?

May 4th, 2011 · 199 Comments

Our submitter in North Dakota, an instructor at one of the state’s institutions of higher learning, found this note left behind by a student in one of her English Composition classes. “We had begun meeting in a computer lab two classes prior,” she writes, “something which had been announced at the beginning of the classes leading up to the room switch as well as on the syllabus.”

But you know, “nobody likes to have to dig your syllabus out.” That’s like, a total drag, dude!

[Prof. redacted],  I showed up to class today and no one was there. Where was class?!?! You need to make announcement when you are changing the location of the class!!! No one likes to have to dig your syllabus out every day or check their e-mail for your last minute changes. I DID show up today and you have to count my paper as ON TIME. Please email me with an explanation.

Seriously, kids today(!!!)

related: The “feeling of failing” debacle

extra credit: “In the Basement of the Ivory Tower,” by Professor X [theatlantic.com]

Tags: college life · confusion??? · exclamation-point happy!!!! · most popular notes of 2011 · North Dakota · spelling and grammar police · that's disrespectful

Ikea’s Danegr chair, never a bestseller, has since been recalled

April 29th, 2011 · 45 Comments

“Smooth move, Ferguson!” he said with a snort, his laughter echoing down the empty hallway. He started to walk on, then stopped short. That tuna-salad sandwich can wait, he thought. This was the English Department, after all — someone should be keeping up appearances! With that, the graduate student made an abrupt about-face, scurrying back to the tiny office he had just left to compose a suitable caps-locked rejoinder.

This, he could already tell, would be the highlight of his week.

Ikea's Danegr chair, never a bestseller, has since been recalled

Author’s note: The chair above was spotted by Ben in a hallway of the English Building (oh, the shame!) at the University of Cincinnati. Adds Ben: “I don’t know how you write a note with only a few words on it, all of them huge, and mess one up so badly.”

related: Childrens can learn!

Tags: CAPS LOCK · Cincinnati · college life · rebuttals · smartass · warning

Thank you for your “constructive criticism”

April 19th, 2011 · 38 Comments

When it comes to comment cards and suggestion boxes, it’s not necessarily hard to get the last word. But as Maggie noticed while leaving a dining hall at the University of Denver, it takes a skilled passive-aggressive to turn a totally neutral, boilerplate response into an obvious “up yours” without so much as an exclamation point.

COMMENT: "Stop serving shitty cheap food, I got sick of it a year ago!" RESPONSE: "Thank you for your constructive criticism and your suggestions on how to improve our operation! -Nelson Dining Team."

related: The Great Egg Salad Ban of ’08 at the Conde Nast cafeteria

extra credit: College Cafeterias Get Bad Grades from the Health Dept. [nytimes.com]

Tags: "helpful" advice · college life · Denver · food · thanks (but not really)

The Accidental Communist

April 18th, 2011 · 78 Comments

“The crayon note showed up about two months before the response,” says Monica at Goucher College, “but both have been a source of great entertainment.”

Goucher College is a COMMUNITY. In communities we share. We do not steal other people's things like corporate America. Share share, that's fair. Go watch an episode on Barney, learn some manners, AND STOP STEALING!

related: Comrades, take notice!

extra credit: A lesson from Barney! **********

Tags: a little patronizing · Baltimore · college life · food · questionable logic · rebuttals · sharing is caring · stealing

Technological Warfare

April 13th, 2011 · 69 Comments

First off, hat tip to the cranky guerilla artist who plastered the bus stops at Rachel’s college campus yesterday with these posters.

(Of course, like the good citizen and PAN-ista that she is, Rachel promptly snapped and sent this pic to us using her BlackBerry.)

NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN THAT ALL CITIZENS MUST EVERYWHERE EVERYDAY CONSTANTLY FIDDLE WITH THEIR CELL PHONES. AT NO TIME IS IT PERMISSIBLE TO SIT IDLE AND OBSERVE THE POETRY OF LIFE OR LOOK INTO TEH EYES OF ANOTHER PERSON. THE ARRIVAL OF A SNIPPIT OF TRIVIAL TEXT HOLDS THE PROMISE OF UNIMAGINED PLEASURE. HONOR THY RINGTONE AND JIGGLING HAND-HELD DEVICE ABOVEL ALL OTHER GODS. REMEMBER ALWAYS

But speaking of art on campus…how’s that for a segue? —  I can’t look at this piece from Matt’s dorm in Reno without hearing it as a Daft Punk song. (That’s probably thanks to far too much time spent playing around with iDaft…time which I do not regret one bit.)

Shit's broken/I'm pissed/Might start/A riot

Okay everyone, let’s get this riot started. Go text this post to all your friends!

related: Daft Flush

extra credit:  iDaft: une vidéo funny [dailymotion.com];

Daft Hands [youtube.com]

Tags: art · cell phone · college life · laundry · most popular notes of 2011

If you’re not going to pay attention in class, please do so in a way that doesn’t distract me from not paying attention either.

March 23rd, 2011 · 92 Comments

So, Claire in Canada was sitting in Psych class and — shame on her — “talking quietly with a friend” when she noticed this guy’s screen in the row ahead of them. After they stopped talking, she says, “He then went on Skype chat with someone for the rest of the class.”

Adds Claire: “Don’t worry, I leaned in and whispered an apology for interfering with his Skyping.”

Please stop whispering behind me!

related: “The hair pulling debackle of lecture”

Tags: Canada · college life