Entries Tagged as 'office'

The “beep it all” approach

May 13th, 2015 · No Comments

Our submitter in Austin calls this “the result of a slowly escalating office disagreement.”

The "beep it all" approach

The "beep it all" approach

related: No cackle zone

Tags: noise · note wars · office · office fridge

Well, that’s legitimately creepy.

March 3rd, 2015 · 48 Comments

I don’t typically like to post notes submitted by the person who left them, but I made an exception for this note by Geoff in New Zealand.

Writes Geoff:  ”Someone actually threw out my lunch (still in its container) within an hour of putting it in the fridge at work. It was a really nice lunch., too. I thought someone had stolen it, then, for some reason I looked in the garbage can…it was covered in coffee grounds and snotty looking tissues. I was mad. Next day I brought lunch again. I wanted to be sure no one would even think of doing it again so I wrote the note, photographed it so my picture would accompany the note, and wrapped it around my lunch with elastic bands. No one has ever thrown my lunch out again.”

This is my lunch for thursday December 17. If you throw it out, I will destroy you. That is all.

related: With some fava beans and a nice Chianti

Tags: kinda creepy · New Zealand · not-so-veiled threats · office fridge · stealing

Some office fridge requests

February 12th, 2015 · 87 Comments

(via reddit)

related: Do you pocket like it’s hot?

Tags: office fridge

Yours Truly, The Skid Marker

February 3rd, 2015 · 147 Comments

Our submitter says this note (and the accompanying response) was posted in the ladies restroom of a busy medical complex in Florida.

Yours Truly, The Skid Marker

related: POEP!

Tags: Florida · office · rebuttals · shit · toilet

Citation: Copier Abuse

December 15th, 2014 · 26 Comments

Alice in Fresno says that since this sign went up, she’s made a point of greeting the copier every time she passes it. The coworker who wrote it was apparently tired of hearing people cursing out the (stupid!) machine when it screws up (all the damn time!).

PLEASE REFRAIN FROM TALKING TO, OR ABOUT, THE COPIER.

related: The printer doesn’t appreciate your tone.

Tags: anthropomorphism · Fresno · office · the printer

So that’s what they mean by “makes mouths happy”

November 16th, 2014 · 32 Comments

Karen in Council Bluffs, Iowa spotted this unsigned note taped to the vending machine in the office breakroom. It sounds like somebody certainly got their 75 cents worth, no?

with regard to the twizzlers nibs...I opened the package and gnawed on the first three I put in my mouth and, as expected, they were chewy. But there was more. There was this strangle tingly sensation in my mouth that I have never quite encountered before. That wasn't so bad though as it was countered by the euphoric high with brilliant colors swirling about. Unfortunately, the comedown was bad.

related: Raging against the (vending) machine

Tags: candy · Iowa · office · vending machine drama

Candy rationing is now in place!

October 21st, 2014 · 40 Comments

Previously, our submitter says, bowls of candy sat in an area of the office most commonly populated by waiting customer and potential hires.

“Now, instead of candy, most of them get to see this note. It provides them with things to think about as they wait, such as: How many Jolly Ranchers, Starlight Mints, and other candies which are neither chocolate nor caramel may one take from each bowl?”

STOP and READ!  Attention Candy Lovers!  Due to the sudden interest in candy the FCA has asked me to start RESTRICTING the amount of candy we consume daily. Candy will only be available between 1:00pm-3:00pm Monday-Friday!  Only take one piece of caramel or chocolate candy from each bowl if necessary!  Thank you for your cooperation!

recently: More office candy bowl drama

Tags: candy · office · office cop

Last time I checked, my mother didn’t work here

October 7th, 2014 · 62 Comments

“My husband and I eloped in Maui last week because we thought it’d be more fun that way,” says Sarah in Seattle.At least one of her husband’s coworkers — apparently — took this as a snub. (But, you know, in a “Hahahahaha, JUST KIDDING!” clenched-teeth sort of way.)

Congrats to Paul!!! (Apparently)
related: Aaand…the honeymoon’s over.

Tags: love & marriage · office

Don’t leave a kitchen sucker punch

September 24th, 2014 · 29 Comments

Suzanne’s office in Chicago is filled with lots of so-called “creatives” — you know, the types who are too busy working on BIG IDEAS to deal with the banalities of, say, dirty dishes. Finally, someone decided it would take a real heavyweight to draw some attention to the problem.

Hi! I'm George Foreman.

related: Right/wrong justified

Tags: Chicago · kitchen · office

Let’s split!

August 19th, 2014 · 31 Comments

Up next, on Bananas with Low Self-Esteem

Up next, on Bananas with Low Self-Esteem...

 

And on the inside…

sad banana

Seriously, what are you waiting for?

Let's split!

 

(Thanks to Josh in Vancouver and John in NYC for submitting!)

related: Yes, we have no inflatable bananas

Tags: bananas · office