PassiveAggressiveNotes.com » office

The printer doesn’t appreciate your tone.

Kerry — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 19:51:33 +0000

If only there were a simple solution to this problem…

related: PC Load Letter?!

Signed, The Doorman Freezing His Ass Off

Kerry — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 02:30:42 +0000

Thanks to Kenny from San Francisco for introducing me to the work of my new favorite doorman.

Hey, I was saving that for later!

Kerry — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 01:13:04 +0000

…because if you are saving the contents of your nose for an afternoon snack, feel free to use to office walls for that purpose!

It’s not a chore; it’s a date!

Kerry — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 02:58:38 +0000

Spotted by Kathy at her office lunchroom in Seattle:

The real sad reality?

related: You sure nag like my mother…

Short on New Year’s resolutions? The janitor has a few suggestions for you.

Kerry — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 19:29:16 +0000

From the ladies’ room…

And the men’s room…

And the men’s room, one day later…

related: And a Happy New Year to you!

Welcome to “Real America”

Kerry — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 20:41:33 +0000

Reports Barb in Las Vegas: “A woman in our office, originally from the Philippines, just got her citizenship. Our often inappropriate receptionist wrote this note on her card.”

Yes, that really does say “no more climbing over barbed wire in the nite.” Adds Barb: “She also printed lyrics from West Side Story in giant font and hung them in the area where we had celebratory cake. So odd!”

related: America the not-so-beautiful

Hover & Flow(chart)

Kerry — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 06:58:34 +0000

Writes Erica in New York: “I don’t think this woman is aware that the aggressive automatic flush makes water splash all over the toilet seats…but she’s obviously very angry.”

related: Coffee pot flowchart

From the Manager’s Book of Quotes for Inspiring Workplace Paranoia

Kerry — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 02:59:38 +0000

Writes our submitter in Madison, Wisconsin: “This note appeared in the staff bathrooms the day after a meeting I had with my boss…a meeting that included some discussion about how large parts of my day involve looking for things to do. So…I guess I’m ‘uninteresting’?”

Why can’t I turn this toaster on?

Kerry — Wed, 09 Nov 2011 03:48:06 +0000

Instead of letting the Facilities Dept. know that the toaster was broken, the folks in Catherine’s office opted to collaboratively solve the problem Apollo-13 style, using only the paper products found in the office supply cabinet.

The major difference? This time, failure was an option.

Happy National Sandwich Day!

Kerry — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 00:10:36 +0000

Would you care to furnish the last line of this haiku?

related: Sandwich guilt

Please don’t treat the stapler like you treat your farm animals

Kerry — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 00:18:18 +0000

This brilliantly understated little note comes to us from a campus library at the University of Auckland, where submitter Louise says the staplers do seem to get jammed into disrepair on a fairly regular basis.

(I have to admit that I kinda love this one. Hat tip to you, librarian!)

extra credit: A rocket-powered detaching device

What am I, the office sugar mama?

Kerry — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 19:43:52 +0000

Writes Heather in Kentucky: “I keep a basket of candy on my desk, but after having my candy basket completely cleaned out during the night shift on several occasions, I started locking it in my boss’s office overnight.”

A few mornings later, she arrived at her desk to find this oh-so-thoughtful note from one sugar-deprived night-shift worker.

The very delicate elevator

Kerry — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 23:39:00 +0000

Apparently the “this will damage elevator” meme is the most exciting thing to happen around this Cincinnati cubicle farm in a long time.

(According to our submitter, the photos below represent only a fraction of the variations that have popped up all over the office.)

related: Death by a Thousand Puns

God may love you, but I can’t speak for the rest of the office

Kerry — Mon, 17 Oct 2011 00:02:12 +0000

Various religious-themed notes have been popping up all over our submitter’s workplace in Phoenix, Arizona. “Several co-workers have found these messages in their offices, stuck in between papers, and written on whiteboards,” she says, but so far no one has come forward to claim authorship.

One of most recent notes showed up in the office kitchen one morning.

Another note turned up beside it sometime after lunch.